No Bullies

 

“Kindness is love in action.”

Another school year is starting. For many students, it can be very exciting and challenging. For others, it can be filled with anxiety and trepidation. Many of us remember the cruelty of fellow students. I know that I do. Yet, every student can make a difference for good in another student’s life as the following story illustrates. 

  At the end of last year, a 12-year-old Colorado student left school heartbroken after going home with an unsigned yearbook. Brody Ridder struggled to make friends all year at school. He was bullied, teased…you name it, it's happened to him. Brody tried to put himself out there to make friends. He’d get kids' phone numbers to try to text them, but they’d never respond to him. Or they'd say, “I don't want to talk to you.”

  At the end of May, students were given their yearbooks. While many students went home with signatures and kind notes, Brody’s yearbook remained virtually empty. When he got home, he became emotional and started to tear up, his mom shared. His classmates told him that they were too busy and that he wasn't important. And then, when she looked through the book, she recalled seeing two names. There were no notes beside them, either, she said. But that's not all. “I saw that Brody had signed it himself. And he wrote: ‘I hope you make some friends,’ It really broke my heart.”

  His Mom, Cassandra, shared her son’s heartbreak on social media and then it went viral. Brody began getting an overwhelming number of encouraging notes from people around the world. Individuals from all walks of life wrote him letters, reassuring him that he isn't the only one who’s struggled with bullying. Over the course of several weeks, hundreds of letters written in various languages filled the Ridders’ mailbox. People not only offered advice and words of encouragement. They shared their own personal experiences with bullying. They came from all ages. One was from a 3-year-old who told his mom what to write. But wait, there’s more.

  Several parents from Brody’s school messaged her. They asked her what class Brody was in, so their kids could stop by and say hello on the last day of school. Before Brody left for the last day of school, Cassandra reminded him that "Ridders aren’t quitters" and handed him his yearbook. On May 24^th, during the school's end-of-year celebration, dozens of students from other grades lined up to sign this young man’s yearbook and send him off with warm messages for the summer. But wait, there’s more.

  Somehow actor, Paul Rudd of Ant-Man fame heard of Brody’s plight and sent the 12-year-old a gift. At the time of the article Brody had already gotten at least 600 letters, and they were still coming. His Mom said, “I cry with the majority of them I read because these people are just…they relate. They've been through it, too.” She plans to make a book out of all the letters one day so whenever Brody is having a tough day, he can pull out it out for some encouragement. And when in doubt, he also has Ant-Man’s personal phone number too. 

  For many students, bullying is an everyday issue that they have to deal with at school. According to the American Medical Association, by the time students finish school, nearly half of students have been bullied at one point or another.

  What is bullying? People usually know what bullying is when they see it, but sometimes it’s hard to put it into words. Researchers who study bullying cite three common characteristics of what makes an act bullying: It’s intentional and tries to cause harm or distress to the victim. It occurs between two students who have different degrees of power. It happens repeatedly over a period of time.

  In a sin-contaminated world bullying is a sad reality. Yet, Christians are to be the difference makers in this depraved world. We need to model and then encourage our children to be difference makers.

  Cruelty and bullying will continue and even increase if Christian students are more concerned about being accepted or popular than doing what is right and pleasing the Lord. Fear and apathy are fertile soil for meanness. Jesus has called us to be salt and light (Matthew 5:13-16).

  But what if your child is the one being bullied? First, realize that there are no accidents with God and He has allowed this to happen. On some level, many of the heroes in Scripture were bullied from Joseph to David, even the Lord Jesus. God uses uncomfortable and even suffering for our good. Joseph would never have been the man of God he became apart from his terrible suffering. Every child needs to learn to persevere even in difficulty. They also need to learn to stand up for themselves. These are life skills and character traits that they will need for the rest of their lives.

  Then, ask questions. Choose to respond biblically and wisely. Sometimes a child (or a parent) is overly sensitive. Sometimes the child is part of the problem. They are giving it out and are surprised when they are receiving return fire, even to a greater extent than they gave out.

  If you need to, do some research. Pray for wisdom and then inquire with those in authority over your child (a teacher or coach) for their perspective. Attempt to problem-solve. Yet, if you need to, depending on the situation move your child to a different class or team. Most schools and teachers do much better at stopping bullying than in the past.

  Encourage your child to be a Good Samaritan.” Luke 10:25-37 has Jesus’ wonderful story of what it means to love your neighbor, even at risk. Your child is going to see other children being bullied. Just as you as an adult would, encourage them to reach out to those being bullied. One of the best ways they can do this is to befriend them and invite them to hang out with them. It’s an opportunity to be Jesus by making someone else feel loved, accepted, and less alone. It also acts as a deterrent to bullying. Bullies are much less likely to pick on someone if they are in a group of friends than if they’re alone. Another helpful thing they can do is comfort and encourage them. Even little things like spending time with them and including them make a much bigger difference than any of us realize.

  In a cruel world walk through the life of Jesus with your child and note how many times Jesus reached out to the ones that others rejected like Zacchaeus or the woman at the well. While we can’t solve all of the world’s problems, we can all make a difference in our own world. It’s what the Lord has called us to do. Determine to make a difference in the life of the next Brody Ridder.

 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

In a world of lies, We must be people of truth

 

“A lie is a snowball; the further you roll it, the bigger it becomes.” Martin Luther

   It was like a real-life scene out of George Orwell’s classic, 1984. The Department of Homeland Security launched a new initiative called the Disinformation Governance Board. This board's stated function was to protect national security by combating “misinformation, malinformation, and disinformation.” It’s not enough that Facebook tells us what’s true and untrue, now we’re to trust the government to do that because we all know politicians and the government never lie. 

  Just during the last century, Joseph Goebbels headed the Nazi propaganda effort. He’s credited with coining the term “The Big Lie” which means that if you tell a lie often enough, people will believe it’s true. 

  Japan blasted propaganda at American forces through several women called “Tokyo Rose.” Their messages were aimed at demoralizing troops by claiming they were losing the war. Most soldiers who listened on their radios treated it as entertainment. 

  Stalin employed newspapers, Pravda and Izvestia, and TV “news” shows to lie to his citizens. He and his successors used jamming devices to block signals from Voice of America, Radio Free Europe, and Radio Liberty. Soviet leaders didn’t want the truth to reach Russian ears.

  But why would anyone believe the U.S. government—or any government—could be an arbiter of what is true and what is false? A brief trip down recent memory lane should dispel such misplaced faith.

  Eisenhower lied about U-2 flights over Russia. Kennedy lied about a “missile gap” between the United States and the U.S.S.R. Johnson lied about the Gulf of Tonkin incident that got us more deeply into Vietnam. Nixon lied about Watergate. Reagan lied about aid to the Contras in Nicaragua. George H.W. Bush lied about not raising taxes. Clinton lied about his relationship with Monica Lewinsky. Obama lied when he said, “if you like your doctor you can keep your doctor.” The Washington Post calculated Trump made more than 30,000 false or misleading claims over four years! They can’t all be “fake news.” And now we have President Biden, who lies about how well the economy is doing and whose Secretary of Homeland Security lies about the southern border being secure.

  While government and unbelievers may be able to rationalize lying, Christ-followers cannot. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 8:44). The 9^th commandment is, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.”

  Because our Lord is the God of truth, a command that saturates Scripture is that Christ-followers are to be committed to truth. “Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another” (Eph. 4:25). “Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices” (Col. 3:9). Yet, lying is so enticing and tempting. Here are the spheres in which we most commonly lie.

  We lie to ourselves. It goes all the way back to the Garden. Rather than taking personal responsibility Adam lied and blamed both God and Eve. Eve blamed the serpent…and self-deception was born.

  Some become very good at lying to themselves. In fact, there is no one who is better at deceiving you than you. It often begins by convincing ourselves that we’re victims. We wouldn’t do ____ if we’d had better parents, or a better environment. A lost world and much of pop psychology have taught us to live in a state of perpetual victimhood because if we’re victims, then we’re not responsible, yet the Bible teaches personal responsibility (Romans 14:12).

  Self-deception becomes part of our daily dialogue with simple statements like, “I’m irritable because I had bad a day at work.” That’s a lie.

  First, it means that temptation is irresistible. Second, it means that God’s grace is not sufficient. Third, it means our behavioral choices are uncontrollable when we encounter adversarial circumstances.

  We lie to our spouses. Foundational to a healthy marriage is trust. There cannot be trust if there is not honesty. If you’re mate believes that they need a “fact-checker,” your marriage is in trouble.

  We’re most tempted to lie when we’re afraid. For example, a wife may lie about how much money she spent or how she truly feels because she fears her husband’s reaction. Husbands may lie about sexual temptation or to avoid conflict.

  While it is acceptable to ask for time to process and share the truth, there is never an excuse for lying. For example, when someone just gets home from work and is tired, that’s not usually a good time for a candid conversation but that conversation still needs to happen.

  We lie to our children. It’s not a sin to not tell everything that you know yet it is always a sin to lie. For example, a parent with a child facing surgery doesn’t have to go into all of the details of what the surgery will entail or the pain that comes with recovery.

  There are times that we withhold truth from our children because of their age. Corrie ten Boom shares a wonderful story of how her father handled the sex questions that illustrates this.

  “So the line had stuck in my head. “Sex,” I was pretty sure, meant whether you were a boy or girl, and “sin” made Tante Jans very angry, but what the two together meant I could not imagine. And so, seated next to Father in the train compartment, I suddenly asked, “Father, what is sex sin?” He turned to look at me, as he always did when answering a question, but to my surprise he said nothing. At last he stood up, lifted his traveling case from the rack over our heads, and set it on the floor. “Will you carry it off the train, Corrie?” he said. I stood up and tugged at it. It was crammed with the watches and spare parts he had purchased that morning. “It’s too heavy,” I said. “Yes,” he said. “And it would be a pretty poor father who would ask his little girl to carry such a load. It’s the same way, Corrie, with knowledge. Some knowledge is too heavy for children. When you are older and stronger you can bear it. For now you must trust me to carry it for you.” Too often by being “honest,” we ask children to carry loads far too heavy for them.

  While the government may get away with a “department of disinformation,” Christ-followers must be committed to truth. Are we those others can trust? Are we honest in all of our dealings? Does our walk match our talk? Do we keep our promises? Are we those whose word is our bond? It’s what God has called us to be. Will you be that person?

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

We Are Family!

 “Racism isn’t a bad habit; it’s not a mistake; it’s a sin. 

The answer is not sociology; it’s theology.” Tony Evans

 What are some of the memorable movies that you remember from childhood? A few that I will never forget were The Wizard of Oz, Sound of Music, Old Yeller and Brian’s Song. 

  If you’ve never seen it, Brian’s Song is based on the true story of a wonderful and what was then a nearly unheard of deep friendship between Chicago Bears running backs, Gale Sayers, who was black, and his fellow running back, Brian Piccolo, who was white.

  These two men met at pre-season training camp. During practice, Piccolo struggles while Sayers shines. Eventually, the two are placed as roommates, a rarity during the racial strife of the era. Sayers encourages Piccolo who is scared he didn't make the team, “if you didn't make the team, we wouldn't be placed together as roommates.”  

  Their friendship flourishes, both in football and in life, quickly extending to their wives, Joy Piccolo and Linda Sayers. Sayers quickly becomes a standout player but injures his knee in a game against the San Francisco 49ers. To aid in Sayers’s recovery, Piccolo brings a weight machine to his house. In Sayers’ place, Piccolo rushes for 160 yards in a 17–16 win over the Los Angeles Rams and is given the game ball. Ultimately, Piccolo wins the starting fullback position, meaning both he and Sayers will now be on the field together. Both men continue to excel in their roles.

  But then Piccolo unexplainably begins to lose weight and his performance declines. He’s sent to a hospital to determine the cause. The diagnosis reveals that he has cancer and must have part of a lung removed. In an emotional speech to his teammates, Sayers states that they will win the game for Piccolo and give him the game ball. When the Bears’ players later visit the hospital, Piccolo teases them about losing the game, laughing that the line in the old movie wasn’t, “Let’s blow one for the Gipper.”

  Tragically, Brian Piccolo’s cancer continues to grow and he must have another surgery. After Gale Sayers is awarded the “George S. Halas Most Courageous Player Award,” he dedicates his award to Piccolo, telling the crowd that they had selected the wrong person for the prize and saying, “I love Brian Piccolo, and I'd like all of you to love him, too. And tonight, when you hit your knees, please ask God to love him.”

  Brian Piccolo succumbed to cancer at age 26. He’s remembered, not for how he died, but for how he lived. This friendship that crossed racial lines is a model for us all. Brian Piccolo and Gale Sayers, though from different races, were closer than brothers. Their bond was football.

  You and I as Christ-followers have a much greater bond than football. We’re blood brothers and sisters because of Christ’s cross. Christ-followers have more in common with other believers than any other human bond, even that of family if our relatives are not believers.

  Our bond begins in that we all have the same problem – sin, yet all have the same Savior. Because of the cross, we will be united for all eternity. As heaven’s choir sang of Jesus, “Worthy are You to take the scroll and to open its seals, for You were slain, and by Your blood You ransomed people for God from every tribe and language and people and nation” (Rev. 5:9). God wants unity and sacrifices His Son to heal human hatred and division.  

  Racism is a sin against God. The Bible tells us that we’re all Imago Dei, “made in the image of God” (Gen. 1:27). Pastor John Piper offers this definition of racism: “Racism is an explicit or implicit belief or practice that qualitatively distinguishes or values one race over other races.” Thus, racism is a sin whether it’s white toward black, or black toward white, Asian toward black, etc.

  Growing up in Atlanta I thought racism was a black-and-white problem. I was shocked when I worked in West Texas to learn that racism poisoned relationships between whites and Hispanics. While in Taiwan I learned that racism poisoned relationships between Taiwanese and immigrant Malaysians. Racism is a rampant cancer that permeates humanity.

  The only hope for conquering racism is the cross and the Church of Jesus Christ. Laws, education, government programs…the list is endless None of these can change sinful hearts to bring about repentance from racism or produce racial unity. Only redemption can bring about heart change so we obey God’s commands to love our neighbor as ourselves.  Jesus said that loving God is the greatest commandment, but then He said that the commandment to love your neighbor is like the first one.

  Jesus connected the command to love God and love your neighbor. One of the main ways that we demonstrate our love for God is by loving our neighbor as we love ourselves (Matt. 22:37-40). Jesus went on to illustrate this love with the parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37). We’re never to limit the idea of a neighbor only to people like us. We are to love all others without discrimination or prejudice. Everyone is my neighbor.

  Loving your neighbor whatever race they are from can begin with something as simple as a conversation, seeing life from their perspective, and truly seeing those around you. These conversations don’t have to be complicated. They can be as simple as inviting someone to lunch. Pursuing racial unity isn’t about diversity, it’s about loving others the way that Jesus loves them.

   Because Jesus died for all, racism is a sin against the gospel. The book of Romans tells us that we’re united not only by creation but also by the fact that we’re all sinners. But just as we’re all sinners, Jesus died for everyone. 1 John 2:2 says of Jesus: “He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.” Racism is a sin against the gospel because Jesus died for all.  

  Racism is a sin against the gospel because Jesus died to make us one. Galatians 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Colossians 3:11, “Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.” These two New Testament verses were absolutely staggering in that day. Greeks and Jews were divided by ethnicity, religion, and culture. The reference to barbarians and Scythians refers to how cultured Romans and Greeks viewed anyone whose speech, manners or habits were foreign and to them uncouth and unrefined. Slave and free is a reference to the deepest divisions of class. Wonderfully, by God’s grace, family and unity, are the terms that replace these divisions.

  Today we’re privileged to have in our pulpit my friend and brother in Christ, Pastor Brian Kenner. To paraphrase, Gale Sayers, “I love Brian Kenner and I’m so glad that God loves both of us and gave Jesus for us.” I’m confident that my brother, Brian, will be a blessing to you today!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

$3 Worth of God

God is our greatest treasure, and our lives will count on earth

only when we invest them in His kingdom for eternity.”  David Platt 

Some years ago Wilbur Rees wrote the following convicting description of the average Christian’s view of the Christian life:

I would like to buy $3 worth of God, please.  

Not enough to explode my soul or disturb my sleep, 

but just enough to equal a cup of warm milk

or a snooze in the sunshine. 

I don’t want enough of God to make me love a black man 

or pick beets with a migrant. 

I want ecstasy, not transformation. 

I want warmth of the womb, not a new birth. 

I want a pound of the Eternal in a paper sack. 

I would like to buy $3 worth of God, please.

  It’s disturbingly familiar, isn’t it? If we’re honest, we find it very convicting. I know that I do. We want to believe that there is a good and gracious God who loves and accepts all people. But then, suggest that this same perfect Being might also be moral, holy, righteous, and pure; or that He may ask something of us in return and suddenly our enthusiasm to know and serve Him begins to wane.

  Yet, as we read the New Testament, it’s clear that what the Lord Jesus has called us to is not to just get “our ticket punched for heaven.” Being a Christ-follower is a surrendered life. Jesus, Himself told us what the cost is: “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me” (Matt. 16:24; Luke 9:23). The call of salvation, the call of God for each man and woman is to a surrendered life. He calls us to come to Him, to embrace Him – all of Him and then having been with Him to go from His presence to be an agent of change in the world.

  When Jesus carried His cross up Golgotha to be crucified, no one was thinking of the cross as symbolic of a burden to carry. It wasn’t jewelry or wall decoration. To someone in the 1^st century, taking up your cross was a one-way trip. It meant one thing – death by the most painful and humiliating means human beings could develop.

  Two thousand years later, Christians view the cross as a cherished symbol of God’s love, atonement, forgiveness, and grace. But in Jesus’ day, the cross represented nothing but torturous death. Because the Romans forced convicted criminals to carry their own crosses to the place of crucifixion, bearing a cross meant carrying their own execution device while facing ridicule along the way to death. “Take up your cross and follow Me” means total surrender. It means being willing to die to self in order to follow Jesus. It’s a call to absolute surrender.

  A hen and a pig saw a church sign announcing the sermon: “What Can We Do to Help the Poor?” The hen suggested that they feed them bacon and eggs. The pig thought about it and replied, “There’s one thing wrong with your idea: for you it requires only a contribution, but for me it requires total commitment!” That’s what Jesus has called us to – total commitment.

  After each occasion that Jesus commanded cross bearing, He said, “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for Me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?” (Luke 9:24-25). Though the call is costly, the reward, both in this life and in eternity is incomparable.

  Read the Gospel accounts and you’ll find that Jesus often sought to discourage would-be followers by pointing out the high price of being a Christ-follower. How different from the typical gospel presentation of today. How many people would respond to committing their life to Christ if it was also shared, “Come follow Jesus, and you may face the loss of friends, family, reputation, career, and possibly even your life”? The number of false converts would quickly decrease. Yet, that’s exactly what the Lord Jesus meant when He said, “Take up your cross and follow Me.”

  If you wonder if you’re ready to take up your cross, consider these questions: Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing some of your closest friends? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means alienation from your family? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means the loss of your reputation? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing your job? Are you willing to follow Jesus if it means losing your life? Because that’s what it meant for believers throughout most of the history of the Church. In many places in the world, those consequences are still true.

  Notice the question is phrased, “Are you willing?” Following Jesus doesn’t necessarily mean all these things will happen but are you willing to take up your cross? If there comes a point in your life when you’re faced with a choice—Jesus or the comforts of this life—which will you choose?

  Commitment to Christ means taking up your cross daily, giving up your hopes, dreams, possessions, even your very life if need be for the cause of Christ. Only if you willingly take up your cross can you be called His disciple (Luke 14:27). Yet, the reward is worth the price. Jesus followed His call of total sacrifice and death to self with the gift of life, eternal life, in Christ: “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for Me will find it” (Matt. 16:25-26).

  When we read Jesus’ words we have a hard time understanding the word “lose.” We live in a culture that’s programmed into us that winning is good and losing is bad. When athletes lose a big game or a salesman loses a big account. they lose sleep as a result. Have you ever seen a car with a bumper sticker that says, “My child is a loser”?

  Our world’s attitude is: “Winner Takes All.” Jesus’ words fly straight in the face of this obsession with winning. He says instead that, “The real name of the game is ‘Loser Takes All.’” His statement about losing and gaining is a paradox. To help us understand this we should substitute some other words and phrases for the word “lose.” Jesus said, “Whoever wants to save (play it safe) his life will lose (waste) it, but whoever loses (surrenders) his life for Me will find it (be rewarded).”

  Instead of talking about losing, it’s really about the wasted life versus the surrendered life. The bottom line is that those are the only two ways you can choose to live – take up our cross or $3 worth of God. My friend, which one will you choose? 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.