Do you need a Social Media Diet?

“Social Media demands a lot of us on top of our already demanding lives. There’s a difference between interest and commitment. So let’s connect as we need to and renew our interest and ourselves.”    Simon Mainwaring

Pastor Jay Y. Kim in his book, Analog Church, shares of an experience at a local restaurant after being convicted about the overuse of his own smartphone at home, keeping him from being present with his family:

  “I was having lunch alone. The restaurant was near a local high school which has an open campus policy, so shortly after I sat down to eat, several students began to file in together for a quick bite before heading back to class. Once again, I’d been on my phone—this time actually checking email. But when I saw the students walk in, I decided to people watch for a while, paying special attention to how they would interact while sharing a meal. What I saw saddened me but did not surprise me. In total, fourteen students ate at that restaurant during the lunch hour, all of them sitting in friend groups, not a single one of them alone. And in total, thirteen of them had a phone in their hands for the vast majority of the time, occasionally looking up to chat with one another, but for the money ost part, losing themselves to their digital content, all while sitting so tantalizingly close to other actual human beings. They were, in the words of Sherry Turkle’s aptly titled book, “alone together.” Entranced by the endless sea of digital possibilities, these kids were missing out on the very unique gift of analog presence surrounding them. While they were busy communicating with the digital world (many of them sending texts and Snapchat messages), they were squandering the opportunity to commune with the real people in their midst. This is what community often looks like in the digital age. Lonely individuals falling prey, over and over again, to the great masquerade of digital technology—the ability to lull us into a state of isolation via the illusion of digital connection.”

  Smartphones are ubiquitous and if we’re honest, they’re very addictive.  Imagine for a moment though if you went to your refrigerator to find all of the  same things that you look at your phone for. Along with food stored there, you opened the door for a friend’s contact information, your stereo system, to post a picture, etc. Would you be very tempted to overeat?

  Part of the victory over poor eating is not having those options readily available. Our smartphones are filled with lots of “junk food” that’s filling us up, taking the place of true life. It’s very easy to overindulge on social media. Like continually grabbing junk food, it becomes a bad habit. Some suggest a complete social media fast. For most that’s too drastic. Yet, I think a “social media diet” is a healthy choice for most of us.

  Personally, I’ve found that social media and media, in general, is often too toxic for me. I seek to limit how much I ingest. I want my phone to be MY tool and not be its slave. Here are some benefits of a media/social media diet.

  More time for what’s really important. By limiting social media, you’ll be amazed at how much time is freed up. It’s impossible to have a quality conversation with those that we truly care about if we’re scanning our phones. In the U.S. (aside from work usage), the average person spends a little over 7 hours a day watching TV or looking at their mobile device.

  The Bible says that we’re to be “making the best use of the time, because the days are evil” (Eph. 5:16). We’re not promised tomorrow and neither are those that we care about. A “diet” gives us time for what has lasting value. With a bit of a media diet think of the free time for more social interaction with others, reading books and material that redirects our focus on our eternal Heavenly Father, not this temporal world.

  You’ll have a clearer mind. Most notice almost immediately by dramatically limiting media that they feel more clear-minded. Being in front of a computer or phone screen for an extended period of time can even cause physical issues such as headaches, dry eyes, and eye irritation.

  Most find it easier then to focus on what is going on where they are in the present and less on what everyone else is doing. While it’s important to engage with friends and family, constant posts and scrolling through news feeds can make your mind feel jumbled and distracted.

  It enables you to experience life in the moment. Stepping away from media allows us to be more in the present moment and utilize our minds with intention and purpose as God intends for us. Media is very distracting. Have you ever tried to have a conversation with someone with the TV on, or when they’re scanning their phone? It’s nearly impossible.

  A media diet enables you to enjoy life’s moments and relationships with more intent. It opens our hours to be filled with the time God has given us and helps us to better see His working in our lives.

  It can help you sleep better. Studies show that the use of a screen prior to bed can cause a great disruption of sleep. The longer you’re on them prior to attempting to sleep, the longer it will take to actually fall asleep. You’ll probably find that a media diet helps you feel more rested. The effects our screens have on our quality of living are more than most of us realize. And a good night’s rest is a great starting point for a new day!

  It will help you have stronger relationships. Loneliness has become an epidemic. While we’re interacting with people via our phones hundreds of times a day, most of us have very few meaningful interactions with people on a daily basis. You’ll find that this frees up time and you won’t feel so rushed, leaving more time to relax and spend quality time in conversation.

  We were created for relationship with our Heavenly Father and with each other, limiting media is an awesome way to get away from faux relationships and back to the real thing!

  It will help you have a stronger relationship with your Heavenly Father.

Even for those of us who live kingdom-minded lives, it’s so easy to become distracted. When we slip out of focus with God, we see it in our lives and so does the world. We become more easily agitated, we feel busy and anxious. All of these things are not only detrimental to us, but also to our relationships and our testimony for the Lord Jesus.

  As we mature in our faith we begin to see that any focus that is not fully on the Christ is out of focus. We need to be in the Word, growing and maturing so we can better serve His Kingdom and better enjoy this abundant life that Jesus died to give us. If you’re not regularly in God’s Word or find your time rushed, a media diet will free up time to help you know better the Father who loves you so much that He gave His Son for you and has a wonderful plan for each day. That time and communication is essential for your spiritual health and for your life to have significance.

  The best time to start a new healthy habit is today. Try it! Let me know the wonderful changes that God gives you from a media diet.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Fully Committed

“There’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit. When you’re committed to something,

you accept no excuses, only results.” Art Turock

When Texas pastor, Jim Denison, was in college, he served as a summer missionary in East Malaysia. While there he attended a small church. One day during a service, Denison happened to notice some worn-out luggage leaning against the wall in a corner of the church. When the pastor finished his sermon, he extended an invitation for people to receive Christ.

  A teenage Malaysian girl made her way down the aisle to announce her decision to follow Christ and be baptized. As was their tradition, they baptized the girl and a few others who had decided to trust Christ at the end of the service. But Jim remembered the luggage he’d seen earlier and asked the pastor about it as he was leaving the baptistry. The pastor pointed to the teenage girl who’d just been baptized and told Denison, “Her father said that if she was baptized as a Christian, she could never go home again. So she brought her luggage.”

  That’s a very common occurrence, particularly in cultures or in families antagonistic to Christianity. The price to follow Jesus is very high. The commitment to Jesus by believers who pay the ultimate price for following Christ puts me to shame. When we get Home, I believe that they’ll be some that are closest to the Throne! I can’t wait to meet them!

  American culture is anti-commitment, particularly when it comes to our walk with the Lord. Committing to a local church has become unusual. Some believers will attend, often for years, and never make a commitment of membership. It’s a bit like someone who lives together for years, yet never takes that step of an official marriage.

  While it’s true the Bible never uses the term “church membership,” a study of Scripture clearly shows that membership was the norm for those early believers. Each local church knew who was committed to their fellowship and who wasn’t. Nearly every letter written in the New Testament was written either to a church or to the pastor of a church.

  During this Pandemic I’ve continually repeated, #ThisOURtime. In one of the most difficult periods in recent history, our God sold both of our properties that we needed to sell, though they’d previously been on the market for several years. During this Pandemic because of your generosity, we’re able to pave our parking lot. During this Pandemic, we’re able to hire a new part-time assistant pastor, James Hauser. During this Pandemic because of the Spirit working in lives, we’re adding seven believers to our church membership. It brings tears to my eyes as I contemplate our Heavenly Father’s hand of blessing on our church!

  The local church is God’s plan. Study the New Testament and you’ll quickly discover that it’s God’s plan for this post-resurrection age. Several New Testament metaphors for the church delineate official membership.

  The local church is a family. This is my favorite picture of the church (Gal. 6:10; Eph. 2:19). Paul and Peter both call the church God’s “household” (1 Tim. 3:15; 1 Pet. 4:17)—another word for “family.”

  What’s your family made of? Members, of course. Family members aren’t names on a paper or a file folder of marriage and birth certificates. A family is a network of relationships and obligations. Family members are bound to one another. They share meals, celebrate together, mourn together, rejoice together, make decisions together, and when they’re apart, they long to reunite. Family is a place where we share our intimate secrets and struggles, yet are still loved and accepted.

  Are you like me? I have lifelong friends in this church who are brothers and sisters in Christ. Yet, it’s not just our church. I have brothers and sisters who I’ve loved for more than forty years that I connected with at one of the first churches that I served in LaCrosse, Wisconsin.

  If you have a painful biological family history, in the church we have a new family. It’s not anywhere near perfect, yet unlike our natural families our spiritual one is functional not dysfunctional, in that we’re committed to Jesus, committed to loving each other, committed to unity in the midst of diversity and committed to biblical problem solving.

  The local church is a body. In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul refers to the church as the “body of Christ” and to Christians as “members” of that body—an image he likely adopted from Jesus Himself (Acts 9:4). The Bible knows nothing of an individual, isolated or independent Christian. A Christian is like a hand, a foot, a toe, an artery, a kidney, or any other body part—we’re only healthy and useful if we’re in the body. This metaphor is fertile for application. It dignifies every church member because every body part is necessary. It also suggests the danger of not being in the body. How healthy is a detached limb or a discarded organ? The metaphor ties our spiritual health to each other. As we know from our own bodies, when one member suffers, the whole body suffers.

  The Apostle Paul refers to the believers at Corinth as “members” of the body of Christ five times just in 1 Corinthians. A member of the body of Christ as being vitally connected to the life of the body—so much so that the joys and suffering of other members become your own (1 Cor. 12:26). The shared life between the members assumes that they’re rubbing shoulders with one another, bearing one another’s griefs, and sharing in each other’s joys and burdens.

  The local church is a temple. Paul calls the church the “temple of God” (1 Cor. 3:16–17). Peter calls Christians “living stones” that build up a “spiritual house (1 Pet. 2:4–5). As we await the return of Christ, the church is now the dwelling place of God. Like bricks mortared together, a church is composed of individuals built into a single temple. As we work for the “common good” of the congregation, we manifest His Spirit that resides in us (1 Cor. 12:7). We’re held together in Jesus, Who is the cornerstone of our foundation as a structure built by God through His Spirit.

  As we’re joined together by Jesus, He’s the source of our unity. Our foundation is God’s Word, so we must study it, teach and preach it, and frame our lives by it. It’s our blueprint. But the building is incomplete. We’re continually under construction, so we must not get used to the décor or become satisfied that enough rooms have been added.

  Scripture is clear. The Christian life is a call to total commitment. Jesus challenges us to “take up our cross and follow Him.” He loves the church so much that He died for it (Eph. 5:25). He’s called us to love His church too and live for it. It’s a call to commitment. Do you need to sign up?

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Kindness

“Cold words freeze people, and hot words scorch them, and bitter words make them bitter, and wrathful words make them wrathful. Kind words also produce their image on men’s souls; and a beautiful image it is. They smooth, and quiet, and comfort the hearer.” Blaise Pascal

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon.com, was ten years old when he saw a commercial stating that every puff a smoker took on a cigarette shortened his or her life by two minutes. Even back then he was quite a math whiz, so he began adding up how many minutes a long-time smoker like his grandmother had lost to cigarettes. To his surprise, Jeff’s grandmother began to cry when he announced that she had lost sixteen years of her life to smoking.

  His grandfather took him aside for a talking to. To Jeff’s surprise, his grandfather was not angry, nor did he attempt to punish him. He simply said, “You’ll learn one day that it is much harder to be kind than to be clever.”

  My mentor and quasi adopted Dad, Pastor David Cummins, taught me a lot of things. His investment helped prepare me for ministry. One thing he said has always stuck with me and I’ve often shared it with others. On one occasion he told me, “Scott, I’ve never regretted being too kind.”  

  That’s stuck with me for over four decades. I can attest to the accuracy of those words – I’ve never regretted being too kind. To be sure, there have been a few times that I have been taken advantage of and that’s okay. And more than I want to remember, there have been too many times when I was unkind. Yet, in all of my life, I have never regretted being too kind.

  Kindness is so rare today. We value toughness and meanness. Rarely, do we value kindness. Our culture emphasizes self-promotion and achievement rather than being kind and caring for others. Showing kindness isn’t seen as a priority. It’s often viewed as a weakness. Even for those of us who believe that kindness is a good thing, we’re so preoccupied with our own problems and priorities to make time to invest in and show kindness to each other.

  Perhaps the most surprising aspect of God is His kindness. Kindness doesn’t line up with our preconceptions of a Supreme being or the Creator of the universe. We’d expect that He would be powerful and all-knowing, and maybe even have a mean side. Afterall, many powerful people that we know are known more for toughness and meanness, not kindness. We foolishly equate power and even being a leader with toughness and meanness. Kindness is reserved for Mother Teresa types or Boy Scouts, not those who want to have power or lead.

  A perfect example of true kindness was the Lord Jesus. Huge crowds followed Him and traveled miles just to hear Him speak. Healing the sick, feeding the hungry, teaching the people, caring for the widow, and defending children, Jesus lived 33 years of perfect kindness.

  He doesn’t ask any more of us than what He willingly practiced when He walked this earth. Even on the cross, He displayed compassionate, merciful kindness praying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Defending the weak, poor, and needy, He stated, “As you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”

  Jesus was perfectly selfless in everything He did. Flowing unceasingly from Him, kindness was His lifestyle. He took notice of the cause of the needy, intentionally, and consistently seeking them out, even when He was tired and weary. Without partiality, He was kind to everyone, even if they didn’t “deserve” it. He turned no one away. And by the shedding of his blood on the cross, He demonstrated His love for the entirety of humanity – the ultimate act of kindness. Christ is the perfect role model of kindness.

  Too many of His professed followers though are unkind. Is it any wonder that those outside the Church don’t want our faith? If our Christianity hasn’t radically changed us, what have we got to offer them?

  What does biblical kindness look like? It looks like Jesus. Not for just a season or one day of the year, kindness is for every moment of every day; it’s a habit, a lifestyle, a continual practice. It’s intentional, taking time and patience, a giving of ourselves in “the busy,” even when we’re “too tired.”

   Just being nice for many would be a great starting point. It would entail friendliness, politeness, personal warmth, thoughtfulness, respectfulness, courtesy, and consideration of others. It would mean more smiles than scowls, more laughter than anger, more encouragement than scorn. Most of us could benefit from striving towards the baby steps of the “nice-ness” level of kindness.

  Most of us need to practice kindness so that it becomes our default setting. There’s no better place to start practicing than at home. It begins with our words and tones. As we practice kindness and thoughtfulness with our families, it becomes easier to share when we leave home. Maybe our motto should be: “Kindness – don’t leave home without it.”  

  Kindness can be as simple as a smile (or in our mask times), kind words to a clerk as we check out. It’s a gentle question, “How are you today?” even with complete strangers. It’s holding open a door for someone.

  It’s rarely the big things. More often it’s the little acts that are like oil for smooth relationships. We’ve all experienced them. They warm our hearts, bring a smile to our face and stick with us all day, sometimes for years.

  As you and I intentionally choose to show kindness, the light of the Lord Jesus shines out of us to a harsh world in desperate need of our Savior, a generation in need of love, grace, and kindness. If others talk about us, may it be that they talk about us being filled with kindness. Please be Jesus to someone today and every day. Make the Savior your role model and kindness your lifestyle.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.