A Christ-follower with a limp: pedophile

Sunday, August 19, 2018

Sweeping webs or killing spiders!

Currently, Jane and I are vacationing at a cabin in Muddy Pond, Tennessee (and no, I’m not making that name up). It’s one of our favorite vacation spots and will be our 4^th time there. It’s nestled in the mountains and we even have our own lake. Our nearest neighbors are bullfrogs and perhaps an errant cow. It’s in the middle of a Mennonite Community, folk who have become friends and whose simpler lifestyle is a wonderful retreat to encourage deep soul rest. It’s a large, one room cabin with a bedroom, living room, kitchen and even a jacuzzi. The only separate room is the bathroom. Our view though of that “bathroom” totally changed after our last visit a couple of years ago. That bathroom is NOT a safe place.

We were about to go to bed. I believe I was reading, dozing between somewhat intelligent thought and la-la land, when Jane cried out for me with a very serious tone, “Scott, there’s an enormous spider in the shower!” Since Jane is known for her dread of spiders, I must confess that it wasn’t a “Husband of the Year” moment and I didn’t take it all that seriously. So, I ambled out of bed and peeked. It wasn’t “enormous.” Gargantuan would be a more accurate description! It was the Godzilla of spiders. No doubt it had illegally immigrated from some South American country or escaped from a local zoo. It was terrifying! My greatest fear was that I might miss when I sought to execute it. Then, neither of us would sleep all night for fear that we’d be dragged out of bed and have all of our internal organs sucked out and fed to its offspring.

Fortunately, I was able to terminate it with one quick, hard shot from a broom. But every night this vacation, like someone who has watched Psycho one too many times, I’ll be peeking behind the shower curtain.

Wouldn’t it be foolish to clean up spider webs and never kill the spider? Ours is a culture though that cleans up webs, even wrings its hands over them, yet fails to acknowledge even the existence of spiders.

Nearly every day there is news of another sex crime. A teacher or minister molests a child. Someone is arrested for child pornography. Another victim in the #MeToo movement comes forward and names some person of power or fame as their abuser. Those are all spider webs.

The Godzilla Spider no one seems to want to acknowledge that is behind the curtain is pornography. Imagine this scenario – America has a problem with obesity. As a result, there’s a needed emphasis on healthier food.

Can you imagine though how much worse it would be if every time you turned on your computer, a dozen donuts popped out? Or, when you googled something on your smart phone, Skittles appeared? As you channel surf, Big Macs pour out of the remote? Obesity would become a gargantuan problem. Yet, that’s exactly what happens with porn. It’s ubiquitous. It used to only be found in the back of the magazine rack of sleazy stores. Or, it could be found in “Adults Only” stores where creepy men, shuffled in late at night. But that’s not the case today.

It was horrible when porn came in on our computers via the Internet, now it’s invaded our smart phones. A device invented for communication is the entry point of unlimited moral debauchery.

Here are some spider statistics you may be unaware of. Porn sites receive more regular traffic than Netflix, Amazon, & Twitter combined each month. Those who admit to having extramarital affairs were over 300% more likely to admit consuming porn than those who’ve never committed adultery. 30% of all data transferred across the internet is porn-related. The most common female role in porn is of women in their 20’s portraying a teen. Recorded child sexual exploitation (child porn) is one of the fastest-growing online businesses. Porn is a global, estimated $97 billion industry, with about $12 billion coming from the U.S. In 2016 alone, more than 4,599,000,000 hours of porn were consumed on the world’s largest porn site. 64% of young people, ages 13–24, actively seek out porn weekly. A study of 14 to 19-year-olds found that females who consumed pornographic videos were at a significantly greater likelihood of being victims of sexual harassment or sexual assault. A study of 18-year-old males found that frequent users of pornography were significantly more likely to have sold and bought sex than other boys of the same age. A 2015 meta-analysis of 22 studies from seven countries found that internationally the consumption of porn was associated with increases in verbal and physical aggression, among both males and females.

What does all this mean? As long as porn is so pervasive, sex crimes will continue to escalate. Or, they will be decriminalized. As porn desensitizes, self-control becomes more difficult. Eroticism becomes an insatiable raging inferno. As culture becomes desensitized, perversion like child porn will be “normalized.” The Guardian recently featured an article with a disturbing claim that there’s “not even a full academic consensus on whether consensual pedophilic relations necessarily cause harm.”

Personally, I think the #Metoo movement has a short shelf life. Illicit sex is a cash cow. The lust for money will ultimately muzzle the movement.

What should a Christian do? By God’s grace, live out biblical purity. If you have a problem with porn, confess it as sin and repent. Often, it helps to have an accountability partner. Then, if you wouldn’t hand the keys to the car to a child, why hand a smart phone to a teen? Limit their screen time. Know what they’re watching.

Be careful what you rationalize as “entertainment.” Soft porn slipped into popular shows erodes our souls. We begin to see image-bearers of God as commodities and less than human.

May Christians join with a teenage Joseph, “How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?”? (Genesis 39:10). We must honor and celebrate marriage and biblically healthy sexuality (Proverbs 5:15-19). It’s time to stop sweeping webs and start killing spiders.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.

Tuesday, March 20, 2018

The "Wonder" of loving the unloveable

“Compassion is the deep feeling of sharing in the suffering of another and the desire to relieve that suffering.” Jerry Bridges

Unusually tall and bearing a facial scar, a twelve-year-old girl from Denver was called “Gorilla Scarface” by classmates until she finally snapped and took her own life in the spring of 2014. A week before killing herself, she’d left the following message on Instagram: I’m just not Okay.

Tragically, it’s not an unusual story. If you Google stories about bullying, have a box of Kleenexes nearby because it will break your heart.

Recently, Jane and I watched the movie, Wonder. If you haven’t seen it, I’d encourage you to. It’s a powerful story that left us feeling highly moved. Wonder tells the incredibly inspiring and heartwarming story of Auggie (short for August) Pullman, a boy with horrible facial differences who enters fifth grade, attending a mainstream elementary school for the first time. Previously, his mother homeschooled him, to protect him from the taunts and bullying that he’d face because of his abnormal appearance in a school setting. But now his parents want him to attend fifth grade with other kids, so he begins attending Beecher Prep School. Auggie even has the kind of sense of humor that can win kids over—well, most of them anyway. While the Pullman family isn't particularly spiritual, his Mom (Isabel), does pray aloud, “Dear God, please make them be nice to him,” when dropping Auggie off at school one day.

Both Dad and Mom are united in their love and commitment to their children. The principal at Auggie’s school is very concerned that Auggie be treated well and not bullied. His teachers care. One even has a daily character lesson. At first, all the children dodge Auggie but eventually, they’re won over and not only become Auggie’s friends but defend him against attacks from others. The movie is a transparent account of the burdens and feelings of others, even those without special needs.

When we finished watching it, I Googled the movie and was disappointed to discover what I’d already suspected – it’s just a good story, a work of fiction. We know from hard experiences that the world rarely works like that. All of us remember the cruelty of school. It’s likely that you personally felt the sharp blades of cruelty pierce your own soul as classmates or a teacher said things to you that were thoughtless or cruel.

Yet, I think Wonder is popular because it’s what the world, even a lost one, truly desires. Though our world is cruel, most people don’t want it to be. They want it to be like Wonder, where the odd, strange, are accepted, appreciated and loved for who they are. Yet in spite of all the anti-bullying programs or talks about “being kind,” don’t expect it. It’s nearly impossible to work up that which you don’t already possess inside. This world has little time for those who are different. Love and patience are not the fare a lost world naturally serves up. Sadly, it’s a dog eat dog world that lives out the worldview continually taught, the evolutionary worldview of survival of the fittest.

Yet, it occurred to me, as I watched Wonder, that it’s exactly what the we, the Church, must be. Scripture teaches that every person is a special creation, made in the image of God and designed by Him, (Psalms 139:13-16). We must not be content with being Pro-life; We must be Pro-living. We’re to be Jesus in a cold, harsh world. Our Lord cared for those who were outcasts or obnoxious. The demon-possessed who screamed for attention. Blind beggars who disrupted His sermon begging to be healed.

The next time you’re in public and observe someone who is disabled, watch the responses of those around. Rarely is there compassion, but annoyance and impatience. Watch how people react to an elderly person with a walker or wheelchair. In a restaurant, you can almost feel the disdain for someone who is grossly obese.

And what about children, particularly those with special needs? Then, what about those who’ve been overcome by sin? The immoral, the addict, the drunk, the pedophile, unwed mother, the recently paroled. Our world has “sanitized sins” that are socially acceptable. But violate those standards and you are a pariah. The “No Vacancy” sign is quickly posted.

In the Church, that must not be us! No one was beyond Jesus’ love and care, not even those who rejected Him. Our Lord continually reached out to them again and again. As they crucified Him, He prayed for them and loved them, “Father, forgive them. They know not what they do.”

For several decades the Apostle Paul’s words from 1 Corinthians have echoed in my heart, both rebuking and encouraging me: “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (6:9-11).

We who have personally experienced God’s love and grace, do we really dare we say to another image bearer of God, “You’re not welcome here! You’re not our kind of people!”? While at Grace, because of the teaching of Scripture, we’re not an “affirming” church, yet we must be an accepting one – we accept any and all sinners who are just as guilty, just as loved and just as reachable by the Cross as we are. A church that truly shares the grace of God really is a Wonder and that’s not just a nice story!