Giving Away Kindness

 

“Three things in human life are important: The first is to be kind. 

The second is to be kind, and the third is to be kind.”  Henry James

 
With the recent Olympics a wonderful story from 2019 has been resurfacing. At a match in August of that year, Israel’s women’s lacrosse team showed true sports (wo)manship during their match against Kenya. Israel defeated Kenya, 13-4, at a match during the 2019 Women’s Lacrosse Under 19 World Championship in Peterborough, Ontario. Though they won, the Israeli players realized something was unfair. The teams weren’t on equal footing, literally. None of the Kenyan players had cleats, which put them at a great disadvantage. The Israeli team decided to do something about it, surprising their opponents with brand-new footwear.
  Rain from the night before the match resulted in the Kenyan women slipping all over the field. Their tennis shoes couldn’t provide the proper traction. Many of the Kenyan athletes lived in poverty in two-bedroom mud shacks housing families of eight and had to overcome numerous obstacles to even get to the tournament. They’d ordered new running shoes, but upon arriving in Canada, discovered they were in U.S. sizes and not in the U.K. sizes they’d ordered.
  After the game, Michael Duvdevani, whose daughter, Ella, is on the Israeli team, discovered that the Kenya team did not have any cleats, and he wanted to do something about it. In a group message with all of the Israeli team parents, Duvdevani explained the situation and asked: “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” They were. That evening Duvdevani contacted the Kenyan team’s assistant coach to gather his team’s shoe sizes. Then, he found a store in Peterborough that luckily had the 18 pairs of shoes in the sizes the Kenyan teens needed. Duvdevani paid for all the shoes upfront (he was later reimbursed by the rest of his team’s parents). With the help of his two younger children, he packed the shoes labeling each box with the players’ name and corresponding jersey numbers.
  The next day, the Kenyan coach brought his team to the Israeli-Belgium game under the ruse that they were scoping out the Belgium team, who the Kenyans were scheduled to play the following day. In reality the Israeli teens wanted to present them with their brand-new cleats and surprised their new friends with the brand-new shoes after the MVP ceremony.
  Hugs went all around. Neither team fared particularly well in the tournament, but the Israeli and Kenyan teams continued to support each other. A couple days after the cleats were gifted, the Kenyan team ventured over to the Israelis’ match against Ireland. Still dressed in their jerseys from a game earlier that day, the Kenyan girls waved Israeli flags, and danced and cheered for their newfound friends. I love these words from the Israeli goalie, Lielle Assayag, “This is what I’ll remember in twenty years. My friends, my old ones, and my new ones.” 
  In an angry world where it seems nearly everyone is irate about something, Christ-followers must be known for being kind and gracious. What does it take to be consistently kind?
  It takes resilience. Those who are genuinely kind without expecting reciprocation have a unique ability to bounce back from setbacks. They experience the same hurdles we all do – losses, failures, and disappointments – but respond to them differently. Rather than dwelling on negative outcomes, they choose to respond with kindness. Their resilience stems from this kindness – a unique strength as admirable as it is powerful.
  It takes empathy. It’s not just about understanding someone’s feelings, it’s actually sharing in them. When someone is going through deep waters and shares their troubles, an empathetic person listens and seeks to understand. Empathy isn’t about solving problems or giving advice. It’s about understanding another person’s situation and feelings so deeply that you can almost feel them yourself. A kind person connects with others on a deeper level. They’re able to put themselves in the other person’s shoes and truly understand their emotions.
  It takes authenticity. Genuinely kind people don’t wear masks, don’t put on a show, and don’t try to be someone they’re not. They’re comfortable in their own skin and aren’t afraid to be transparent. Because they’re authentic, they create a safe space for others to be themselves too, fostering deeper and more meaningful connections in the process.
  It takes patience. Patience is a significant strength that kind people possess. It’s not just about waiting without complaint. It’s a deeper form of patience that shows up in their interactions with others. They don’t rush others, impose their timelines, or expect immediate change.
  Have you ever had a teacher who worked with you when you had difficulty understanding something? They don’t rush you and take extra time to explain things until you grasp them. In a world that’s always in a hurry, this kind of patience is a unique strength.
  It takes optimism. Another word for it is – hope! If anyone should have hope, it’s a Christ-follower. We know no one is beyond God’s love, no situation is impossible, and we’re all going to get Home before dark. This optimism stems from a deep-seated belief in the goodness of God. Genuinely kind people see the best in others, even when it’s not apparent. Like Jesus, they believe in second chances and the potential for true transformation. Their optimism isn’t just infectious, it’s inspiring.
  It takes generosity. Think about the last time you gave something without expecting anything in return. How did it make you feel? Kind individuals have an innate sense of generosity. It’s not just monetary or some grand gesture. The greatest acts of generosity are often the simplest ones – like giving time, attention, or words of encouragement when someone needs it.
  It takes gratitude. This may be the most important trait. Kind individuals have a deep sense of gratitude for all that God has given them. They appreciate the people and experiences in their lives, both good and bad. They understand that every encounter, every moment, every trial is an opportunity for spiritual growth and to glorify God. Their deep gratitude is reflected in their attitudes and actions…in the way they treat others. This spirit of gratitude is the root from which their kindness grows.
  As Jesus walked this earth, He was known for being kind. As His followers, we must be known for our Christlike kindness. Are you a Christ-follower? Are you known for being kind? Is that your reputation?

Can we help you spiritually? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

When Holiday Inn was kind...

 

“Kindness is a readiness to do good, to help, to relieve burdens, to be useful, to serve, to be tender, and to be sympathetic to others. It has been said,

‘Kindness is love in work clothes’.” Alexander Strauch

 
Was this your experience? One of our children had a special blanket that they couldn’t sleep without. I remembered that when I read recently of a toddler who left his beloved toy behind at a Holiday Inn Express in Richmond, Virginia. Wonderfully, that’s only the first chapter in this story.
  The family contacted the hotel and the employees helped reunite the little guy with his beloved plush toy, a little dog. The four-year-old was traveling with his family when they stopped to stay at the Holiday Inn Express. After departing, the family realized their son had left his stuffed animal toy behind. Those Holiday Inn employees were so kind. Not only were they quick to find the missing toy and promised to ship it to the family as soon as possible, they went the extra mile. They took that stuffed animal around the hotel, placed it in various spots and snapped pictures. One shows the animal getting some work done on a hotel computer. Another of the animal greeting guests in the lobby — with employees noting that he was “the star of the show.” They even took the toy to the hotel fitness room where he sat on the seat of an exercise bike. 
  The dad of the toddler, named Michael, said in a media statement that the pictures the hotel employees took helped ease the pain of the missing toy. “He was really upset that it was missing, as it’s one of his favorite toys. He was so happy to see how much fun his snuggle puppy was having and wanted me to read it over and over so everyone could hear.”
  It takes so little to be so kind. Yet, when we are kind, we are so like Jesus.
  A current cultural phenomena are Swifties – fans of Taylor Swift and considered one of the largest, most devoted fanbases. They’re known for their high levels of participation, creativity, community, and fanaticism and are the focus of widespread coverage by the media. With her fame, it’s not hard to be kind to a Taylor Swift. Everyone wants to be near a celebrity.
  While most of us don’t interact with celebrities, we are easily focused on the powerful, wealthy, popular, talented and attractive…even in the Church. They’re the ones that we go out of our way to be kind to, but that’s not Jesus. Our Lord was kind to everyone…the rejects, the nobodies, the social outcasts…sometimes people like me and you. As His followers that’s who we’re to be kind to – EVERYONE.
  Jesus was kind to lepers who were the outcasts of His day. Because of the contagiousness of their disease, they were isolated and “untouchable.” Not only was Jesus kind to them, He broke social etiquette by touching and healing them.
  Would you be willing to dine with a gang banger, a known drug dealer? Zacchaeus may not have been a convicted criminal, but in the eyes of the Jews, he might as well have been. In Jesus’ day, tax collectors abused their power to legally steal as government agents, but Jesus asked to have lunch with him.
  Xenophobia is a big problem in our world, but it’s not new. In John 4, Jesus not only talked to a Samaritan woman, He asked her for a favor, for a drink of water. Jesus broke all the societal boundaries and demonstrated for us that kindness is to be universal.
  Jesus was not only kind, but He also forgave those who betrayed and crucified Him. He knew Judas was going to betray Him yet hours before that Jesus washed Judas’ feet.
  Forgiving those who’ve wronged us is one of the greatest acts of kindness you can do. Forgiveness, more than any other act, shows we truly know the Forgiver of our souls. It’s not easy. Yet, as those who have been forgiven an unpayable debt, it’s what we’re commanded to do (Ephesians 4:31-32).
  God has called us to be holy as He is holy (1 Peter 1:16). BUT God has never called us to be hateful or unkind. The Lord Jesus died for the sins we find the most repulsive. There are many moral and social problems today. While the sin is wrong, those who commit them are victims of the Enemy (Satan), not our enemy. John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world” (no one is excluded). As Christ-followers, we’re to be kind to those who humanly we might shun. We’re called to live out Jesus’ supernatural love.
  If we’re going to be Jesus to our world, we must show His love to the victims of sexual sin from adulterers to pedophiles…and everything in between. If we’re going to be Jesus to our world, we must show His love to abortionists and murderers…and everything in between. If we’re going to be Jesus to our world, we must show His love to those who are atheists and Islamic radicals…and everything in between. If we’re going to be Jesus to our world, we must show His love to those on the extreme right politically and to those on the extreme left politically, and the ones in the middle.
  When someone is arrested, no matter what the crime, the Christ-follower should be one of the first to reach out to them. When someone is going through a divorce, the Christ-follower should be one of the first to show grace to both parties. When someone has been fired, the Christ-follower should be one of the first ones reaching out and encouraging them.
  Our world slights and ignores the poor, the obese, the mentally ill, the homeless, alcoholics, addicts and even smokers. We can’t do that! We are commanded to show Christ’s love to them.
  I’ve now been the pastor at Grace for over 35 years. Over the course of those years, I’ve angered a few people. From my perspective, some have badly mistreated me and our church. Am I tempted to give in to anger and bitterness? Yes, but it would be wrong and a sin. By God’s grace, I seek to live out Romans 12:14-21. I pray for them and ask the Lord to love them through me. It’s not always easy yet we’re not called to do what’s easy. We’re to do what is right! As someone who has been forgiven so much, it would be so evil to hold back what I have been so undeservingly given. My adopted Dad often said, “I’ve never regretted being too kind.” I try to live by that. I too have never regretted being too kind and you won’t either.

Can we help you spiritually? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

Disney: Come Over to the Dark Side

 

“In a dark place we find ourselves…” Yoda 

  Okay, I’ll confess, I’m an avid Star Wars fan. If you’re a Star Wars fan, you probably know that a new series has been released in the Star Wars saga. Ahsoka Tano first appeared in the 2008 TV series, The Clone Wars and has since appeared in several other shows. She now is the protagonist of the new show on Disney Plus, Ahsoka. Disney is hoping for a hit to rival its last big fan favorite—The Mandalorian after Disney canceled the star of the show Gina Carano for having “politically incorrect” views.   
  Please understand, I’m not suggesting that you not watch Ahsoka. Yet, what I find hypocritical is that the heroes in Star Wars are those who resist governmental edicts, stand up for freedom and personal rights. They refuse to be cloned into the thinking of the Dark Side and Empire. 

  But ever since George Lucas sold the rights to Star Wars to Disney, they have acted more like the Empire than the Resistance. For example, one is not allowed to be a star and have an opinion in your private life that doesn’t goosestep with the “Empire.” Gina Carrano discovered that and was cancelled by Disney. She shared an Instagram story that compared “hating someone for their political views” to the treatment of the Jews during the Holocaust. While I’m not defending Carrano, I find it ironic that other celebrities can refer to opponents with similar slurs of “Hitlers” or “Nazis” and no one blinks.

  Even innocuous fairy tales are targets of the cancel crowd. Disney has been criticized for the kiss the prince gives Snow White without her consent while under the witch’s spell. The reasoning is that it can’t possibly be true love if only one person knows it’s happening. While Disney has not “cancelled” some popular movies, many are currently appended with an advisory notice warning of “negative depictions and/or mistreatment of people or cultures…These stereotypes were wrong then and are wrong now.” What movies are objectionable? Dumbo, Aladdin, The Aristocats and Peter Pan, and even Swiss Family Robinson.

   A vital part of a healthy culture is an open dialogue of ideas and differing worldviews. As Christians, we believe that “truth does not fear scrutiny.” Cancel culture though is the deadly byproduct of both political correctness and postmodernism. Political correctness is the attempt to minimize social and institutional offense through policing speech (and thought), forcing the use of certain words and banning other words. Postmodernism asserts that all truth claims are subjective (“what is true for you is not necessarily true for me”). Truth becomes a matter of preference. “Tolerance” is promoted as a supreme value. Ironically, the more “tolerant” a culture becomes, the more intolerant it is of anyone it perceives as intolerant. People deemed “intolerant” or potentially giving offense must be silenced. Cancel culture is the outcome of such distorted reasoning. Unless intellectual and moral sanity returns to our culture, Christ-followers with a biblical worldview will potentially find themselves cancelled.

  So how do we who love Jesus respond to those who cancel us? Do we fight fire with fire? Personally, I believe our model is found in the example of our Savior who experienced cancelling and was crucified because He was on “the wrong side of history.” His followers have followed His example throughout the ages, and we must do the same.

  We respond with grace. Cancel culture shames an individual for something they’ve said or a belief they hold and claims that they no longer have a part in a social context. Instead of fighting back, we offer grace. Grace is undeserved favor that’s not earned. As we’ve received unmerited favor from God, we must extend His grace to others. We were once God’s enemies but through the blood of Jesus, we’re now His friends. Understanding the grace, we’ve received (Ephesians 2:8-9) gives us the ability to offer it to others. Jesus said, “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” We must extend God’s grace so those who mistreat us, so they see Jesus in us.

  We act with humility. In a cancel culture there’s someone “right” and someone “wrong.” Those seen as “right” do the condemning. Those seen as wrong are condemned and shamed. Yet Jesus was known for His humility, and we must be known for that same trait. We must examine ourselves, our actions, and beliefs and align them with God’s Word before judging someone else. It takes humility to do that. A heart of humility allows us to listen first and avoid arguments. If we’re being judged without an opportunity to explain our beliefs, we have the opportunity to act humbly and avoid an argument.

  We strive for unity. Cancel culture promotes division, an “us vs. them” mentality. Christ-followers are to seek to live in unity with unbelievers “as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18). We are for work and ethical businesses prospering. We are for personal safety, care for the poor, disabled and disenfranchised. We are for a basic education to be available to everyone. We are for justice. While we may disagree on some moral issues, there are many things that we can join with even those who disagree with us on our faith.

  We offer forgiveness. Cancel culture teaches holding grudges and excluding someone for what they’ve done or said. The gospel calls us to offer forgiveness. As we’ve been forgiven, we must offer forgiveness to even those who hate us and offer the opportunity to be redeemed from their sins. The gospel implies that we were undeserving, yet we received another chance, and we must offer the same forgiveness to others.

  While we must resist being cloned or silenced by this world’s system, Jesus’ mission for us is to share God’s plan of redemption. His ways will seem more and more otherworldly. As His followers, we must offer grace, practice humility, remain united, and extend forgiveness even to those who treat us horribly. It’s what Jesus did. It’s what He has called us to do!

Can we help you spiritually? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

Trunk 'N Treat -- Showing Kindness

 

"You are a Christian because somebody cared. 

Now it’s your turn.” Warren Wiersbe

  Do you remember trick or treating as a child? What was one of your favorite costumes? One of my favorite traditions as a child was buying a pumpkin and attempting to cut a face in it. Some have such great talent at that (I’m not one of them). To me, it’s a much better tradition than buying a plastic pre-made one at a store. There’s something fulfilling about a healthy “artistic”  opportunity to come up with something creative.

  This all reminds me of one of my favorite Christian Halloween stories. It seems that a woman had recently been baptized. One of her coworkers asked her what it was like to be a Christian. She was caught off guard and didn’t know how to answer. But, then she looked up, she saw a jack-o’-lantern on the desk and answered, “It’s like being a pumpkin.” Her co-worker asked her to explain that one.

  “Well, God picks you from the patch and brings you in, and washes off all the dirt on the outside that you got from being around all the other pumpkins. Then He cuts off the top and takes all the yucky stuff out from inside the pumpkin. He removes all those seeds and slime of doubt, hate, greed, etc. Then God carves you a new smiling face and puts his light inside of you to shine for all to see. It’s our choice to either stay outside and rot on the vine or come inside and be something new and bright.

  I like that! One of my greatest memories from childhood was a friendship with a retired couple that lived across the road from our subdivision, the Jamesons. Like most kids at Halloween, we were looking for a few more houses to go Trick or Treating at. Someone had the idea of going across the road to the Jamesons. Now none of us knew the Jamesons but it was Halloween and we loved candy…and candy is a big motivator for a kid.

  They had a long driveway with a fence and gate, and their house set back probably 50 yards from that gate. Back then, I didn’t know anyone with a fenced-in yard with a gate. Their drive was surrounded by trees, so it was a bit spooky – but it was one more house that might have candy, so we decided to take the risk. I’m so glad that we did.

  Not only did they have treats for our gang of kids they welcomed us into their home…and a friendship with the neighborhood kids was born. They’d make special treats for the kids. Because they owned a huge parcel of property, Mr. Jameson would hook up his tractor to a wagon and load us all up for wagon rides, followed by ice cream floats back at their house. There never seemed to be a bad time to drop in at the Jameson’s. They were so kind and loving to children.   

  What a difference kindness makes! Kindness with no strings attached and expecting nothing in return. The Bible refers to kindness some 40 times. If anyone lived out kindness, it was the Lord Jesus. As believers, we are called to be Jesus in our world. That means that we’re commanded to be kind. It’s part of loving your neighbor as yourself.

  My mentor, Dr. Dave Cummins (for me “Dad” Cummins) often said, “Scott, I have never regretted being too kind” and neither have I. In a cold, harsh, often cruel world Christ-followers should first be known for being kind. Isn’t that what we see from the Cross? “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do”? Isn’t that what we see in Jesus’ story of the Good Samaritan – kindness? He was good because he was kind. 

  Our Trunk ‘N Treat is an opportunity for us to show kindness, often to complete strangers. We’re inviting our community to come to our place so that we can show Jesus’ kindness to them. We’re inviting them to come to our place so that we can demonstrate generosity just as God has shown to us. We’re inviting them to come to our place so that we can welcome them with a warm smile and a friendly face.

  It’s an opportunity to be kind to their children and grandchildren. Most of us don’t pay nearly the amount of attention when someone is kind to us as we do when someone is kind to our children and/or grandchildren. When someone goes the extra mile to be generous to them, to encourage them, to notice and compliment them – it gets our attention.

  We want this event to use it to show kindness to small businesses both within and outside of our church. It’s why we’ve invited Jacobs Smokehouse to bring their food truck. We want people to come get free treats from us and potentially buy food from them. Not only have they endured through Covid, but then the State closed the road to their business for repairs. It could have sunk them and resulted in them going out of business.

  At Grace, we want to be part of lending them a hand. Even if folk don’t buy food from them, it helps Jacobs Smokehouse with free advertising.

  Add to that, we have several small businesses both in and out of our church. We want to be kind to them by letting them decorate a vehicle that advertises their business as they give away candy.

  One of the core teachings of our church is that we can take any seasonal celebration and use it as an opportunity to build bridges of kindness and be an opportunity to share the gospel. It might seem that one of the more challenging holidays to apply that teaching is Halloween, yet in reality, it’s one of the easiest ones.

  First, it’s one of the few times that the neighbors and community are coming to us. Then, this is the one time of year when people are thinking about the afterlife, of life after death. Granted the secular view of this is distorted, yet it’s an opportunity to build a bridge to a discussion about the reality that we are eternally existing souls.

  Most people believe they will live forever, but the question is, if we are going to live forever, what neighborhood will we live in? Halloween acknowledges that there is another life beyond the short one. Though people might make fun of it, they can’t help but wonder what truth there is to life beyond this one. Along with that is the almost universal belief or wish of an afterlife of light reunited with loved ones.

  Halloween gives us the opportunity to share why we believe that Jesus is the only Savior who conquered death and who can give us eternal life and peace, and a home in the neighborhood of joy if we trust Him as Savior.

  At a time when those outside the Church often think Christ-followers are against nearly everything, we want to share what we are for. We are for them! We are for God! We are for sharing the only hope this world has! We are for sharing that God loves them so much that He gave His very best for them, His only Son! And we want to be Jesus to them!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

No Bullies

 

“Kindness is love in action.”

Another school year is starting. For many students, it can be very exciting and challenging. For others, it can be filled with anxiety and trepidation. Many of us remember the cruelty of fellow students. I know that I do. Yet, every student can make a difference for good in another student’s life as the following story illustrates. 

  At the end of last year, a 12-year-old Colorado student left school heartbroken after going home with an unsigned yearbook. Brody Ridder struggled to make friends all year at school. He was bullied, teased…you name it, it's happened to him. Brody tried to put himself out there to make friends. He’d get kids' phone numbers to try to text them, but they’d never respond to him. Or they'd say, “I don't want to talk to you.”

  At the end of May, students were given their yearbooks. While many students went home with signatures and kind notes, Brody’s yearbook remained virtually empty. When he got home, he became emotional and started to tear up, his mom shared. His classmates told him that they were too busy and that he wasn't important. And then, when she looked through the book, she recalled seeing two names. There were no notes beside them, either, she said. But that's not all. “I saw that Brody had signed it himself. And he wrote: ‘I hope you make some friends,’ It really broke my heart.”

  His Mom, Cassandra, shared her son’s heartbreak on social media and then it went viral. Brody began getting an overwhelming number of encouraging notes from people around the world. Individuals from all walks of life wrote him letters, reassuring him that he isn't the only one who’s struggled with bullying. Over the course of several weeks, hundreds of letters written in various languages filled the Ridders’ mailbox. People not only offered advice and words of encouragement. They shared their own personal experiences with bullying. They came from all ages. One was from a 3-year-old who told his mom what to write. But wait, there’s more.

  Several parents from Brody’s school messaged her. They asked her what class Brody was in, so their kids could stop by and say hello on the last day of school. Before Brody left for the last day of school, Cassandra reminded him that "Ridders aren’t quitters" and handed him his yearbook. On May 24^th, during the school's end-of-year celebration, dozens of students from other grades lined up to sign this young man’s yearbook and send him off with warm messages for the summer. But wait, there’s more.

  Somehow actor, Paul Rudd of Ant-Man fame heard of Brody’s plight and sent the 12-year-old a gift. At the time of the article Brody had already gotten at least 600 letters, and they were still coming. His Mom said, “I cry with the majority of them I read because these people are just…they relate. They've been through it, too.” She plans to make a book out of all the letters one day so whenever Brody is having a tough day, he can pull out it out for some encouragement. And when in doubt, he also has Ant-Man’s personal phone number too. 

  For many students, bullying is an everyday issue that they have to deal with at school. According to the American Medical Association, by the time students finish school, nearly half of students have been bullied at one point or another.

  What is bullying? People usually know what bullying is when they see it, but sometimes it’s hard to put it into words. Researchers who study bullying cite three common characteristics of what makes an act bullying: It’s intentional and tries to cause harm or distress to the victim. It occurs between two students who have different degrees of power. It happens repeatedly over a period of time.

  In a sin-contaminated world bullying is a sad reality. Yet, Christians are to be the difference makers in this depraved world. We need to model and then encourage our children to be difference makers.

  Cruelty and bullying will continue and even increase if Christian students are more concerned about being accepted or popular than doing what is right and pleasing the Lord. Fear and apathy are fertile soil for meanness. Jesus has called us to be salt and light (Matthew 5:13-16).

  But what if your child is the one being bullied? First, realize that there are no accidents with God and He has allowed this to happen. On some level, many of the heroes in Scripture were bullied from Joseph to David, even the Lord Jesus. God uses uncomfortable and even suffering for our good. Joseph would never have been the man of God he became apart from his terrible suffering. Every child needs to learn to persevere even in difficulty. They also need to learn to stand up for themselves. These are life skills and character traits that they will need for the rest of their lives.

  Then, ask questions. Choose to respond biblically and wisely. Sometimes a child (or a parent) is overly sensitive. Sometimes the child is part of the problem. They are giving it out and are surprised when they are receiving return fire, even to a greater extent than they gave out.

  If you need to, do some research. Pray for wisdom and then inquire with those in authority over your child (a teacher or coach) for their perspective. Attempt to problem-solve. Yet, if you need to, depending on the situation move your child to a different class or team. Most schools and teachers do much better at stopping bullying than in the past.

  Encourage your child to be a Good Samaritan.” Luke 10:25-37 has Jesus’ wonderful story of what it means to love your neighbor, even at risk. Your child is going to see other children being bullied. Just as you as an adult would, encourage them to reach out to those being bullied. One of the best ways they can do this is to befriend them and invite them to hang out with them. It’s an opportunity to be Jesus by making someone else feel loved, accepted, and less alone. It also acts as a deterrent to bullying. Bullies are much less likely to pick on someone if they are in a group of friends than if they’re alone. Another helpful thing they can do is comfort and encourage them. Even little things like spending time with them and including them make a much bigger difference than any of us realize.

  In a cruel world walk through the life of Jesus with your child and note how many times Jesus reached out to the ones that others rejected like Zacchaeus or the woman at the well. While we can’t solve all of the world’s problems, we can all make a difference in our own world. It’s what the Lord has called us to do. Determine to make a difference in the life of the next Brody Ridder.

 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Loving children like Jesus does

“Children are the hands by which we take hold of heaven.” 

Henry Ward Beecher 

His nickname was “Sparky.” For Sparky, school was all but impossible. He failed every subject in the eighth grade, every subject!. He flunked physics in high school, getting a grade of zero. Sparky also flunked Latin, Algebra, and English. He didn’t do much better in sports. Although he did manage to make the school’s golf team, he promptly lost the only important match of the season. There was a consolation match…he lost that too. 

  Throughout his youth, Sparky was awkward, socially. He wasn’t actually disliked by the other kids; no one really cared that much. He was astonished if a classmate ever said hello to him outside of school. There’s no way to tell how he might have done at dating. Sparky never asked a girl to go out in high school. He was too afraid of being turned down.

  Sparky was a loser. He, his classmates…everyone knew it. So he rolled with it. Sparky had made up his mind early in life that if things were meant to work out they would. Otherwise, he would content himself with what appeared to be his inevitable mediocrity.

  But there was one thing that was important to Sparky — drawing. He was proud of his artwork. Of course, no one else appreciated it. In his senior year of high school, he submitted some cartoons to the editors of the yearbook. You already know what happened – his cartoons were turned down. Despite this particular rejection, Sparky was so convinced of his ability that he decided to become a professional artist. So, after completing high school, he wrote a letter to Walt Disney Studios. He was told to send some samples of his artwork and the subject for a cartoon was suggested.

  Sparky drew the proposed cartoon. He spent a great deal of time on it and on all of the other drawings he submitted. Finally, the reply came from Disney Studios. He’d been rejected once again. Another loss for the loser.

  So Sparky decided to write his own autobiography…in cartoons. He described his childhood self — a little boy loser and chronic underachiever.

  His cartoon character would soon become famous worldwide. For Sparky, the boy who had such a lack of success in school and whose work was rejected again and again, was none other than the great Charles Schulz. He created the Peanuts comic strip and the little cartoon character whose kite would never fly and who never succeeded in even kicking a football —Charlie Brown.

  Through the years I’ve met a lot of  “Charlie Browns.” It’s heartbreaking. You could be sitting next to an adult version of one at church or perhaps work with one, or live near one.

  Early on I began ministering to children. As a junior higher, I would accompany a godly adult leader, Jim Pendley, along with other boys to assist with a Sunday school in a nearby low-income housing project.

  Both Jane and I cut our teeth together in ministering to children. After college, Jane taught second grade. When we were married, we taught a pre-school Sunday school class together. One of the tykes from that class is now a pastor in Madison.

  My heart is filled with many faces from over the years. Many of them were hurting children from horrible homes, who were true victims. In both LaCrosse and Danville, IL, I ministered in bus ministries where we picked up area children. Often the children had to get themselves up to get ready because Mom or Dad were still sleeping off the previous night’s “activities.” In those two churches, we had nearly a hundred children who rode the bus to church. Forty years later I’m still in contact with some of those trophies of God’s grace!

  Our Vacation Bible School kicks off on August 1^st. Becca Mueller, the director of our VBS is praying for 50. Becca never does anything halfway. The team is trained and prepared and supplies have been ordered. Next Sunday we’ll have a prayer of dedication for them in our worship service. YOU though are a key part of this making an eternal impact. We need you to invite children that God has brought into your circle of influence.

  Yet, there are some big hindrances in us reaching these children – social bigotry and lack of faith. I’ve watched it over the years. In fact, as a troubled teen after my Mom was killed, I became that teen that church parents instructed their kids to stay away from because I was a “bad kid.” Praise the Lord for a godly youth pastor, named Kent Richards, who reached out with Christ’s love to me.

  Christian parents, please read the Bible for yourself. You can’t isolate or protect your children from all of the bad stuff and evil people out there. Instead, trust God and prayerfully use your kids as gospel bridges. If God can’t protect your children, what makes you believe that you’ll be able to?

  Who should you look for? What kids should be on your radar? Who should you invite to your dinner table or to come over to play? Who should you invite to VBS or give a ride to church or a kids’ or teen program?

  The quiet kid. This is the child you hardly know is there. They may have learning issues or a disability. Perhaps they’ve learned at home or at school that it’s safer to be quiet.

  The unattractive kid. Maybe they're overweight or skinny. Body shaming happens at church and in church ministries too. It’s usually subtle but it’s there. In a world where attractiveness puts you on the A list, being average or less, or not meeting some societal standard of attractiveness can carry a high price.

  The awkward kid. In a culture that’s sports-driven, heaven help the child with two left hands. They quickly know how few skills they have by the nicknames or that they’re always picked last when teams are chosen.

  The misbehaving kid. Some children misbehave because of a disability. Everyone wants at least some acknowledgment and attention. They want their personhood.

  Or, if you can’t get good attention, you’ll opt for bad attention. Frequently, children act out the drama of their home. Anger, tantrums, sullenness can be a way of coping with a poor home life. Alcohol and drugs can be an attempt at self-medication. Promiscuity is a cry for intimacy, love, and acceptance. Every child wants to be accepted and loved.

  Often Christian parents keep their children away from children who come from troubled homes; divorce, addiction, sexual issues, etc., but those children are not contagious. The Bible speaks often about not judging a child because of the sins of the parents. It’s why it’s so important that we reach out to those who often fall in the cracks. It’s what Jesus did and it’s what He has called us to do. VBS is a great place to start! Will you reach out to the children God has brought across your path?

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

Are YOU Persecuted?

 “Christ’s followers cannot expect better treatment 
in the world than their Master had.”  Matthew Henry

 

  According to one survey, about half of all Americans believe evangelicals face discrimination. Still, others believe they’re facing actual persecution. I’m not sure. What is true is that we’re living in a post-Christian society where the Christian faith is no longer automatically respected.  

  Our culture has changed. The media is less sympathetic to stories where Christians face hate speech or violence than identical stories where other groups are victimized. Social institutions such as academia, media, entertainment, and the arts are likely to be places where anti-Christian prejudice and discrimination take place. Those institutions greatly shape our cultural values. As a result, those with anti-Christian attitudes are in a position to create and sustain anti-Christian perspectives. There’s also evidence that anti-Christian hate can result in discrimination. 

  What should we do? The answer leads to a more important question: What did the early church do? What did first-century Christians do?

  Study the pages of the New Testament and you won’t find those early Christians playing the victim card or screaming oppression. Their response to persecution in Acts 5:40-41 is shocking and convicting. After the Apostles were called in before the Sanhedrin…“they beat them and charged them not to speak in the name of Jesus, and let them go. Then they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the Name.”

  As I read Christian History and track the persecuted Church around the world today, there is little that’s “persecution” in America, though as our culture grows increasingly secular that may change. What we face in comparison to believers in China, Sudan and innumerable other places in the world is hard to label “persecution” or even “oppression.” 

  American Christians need to refuse to go along with a trend of oversensitivity. Our Lord offers us a much better way. He said: “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either… If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for He is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:27-36).  

  How are Christians to respond when they’re mistreated? With grace, love, and kindness. Kindness is a choice to act like Jesus when everything in us tells us that we shouldn’t. It’s not in the big things but in the little ones.

  It’s as small as mowing a neighbor’s lawn or sharing vegetables from your garden with a co-worker. It’s simply speaking to, interacting, and thanking the clerk at the gas station. It’s asking your server if before you ask the blessing for your food if you can pray for them. It’s befriending that co-worker or student who is friendless. It’s using social media to encourage others, noticing birthdays, anniversaries or a child learning to ride a bike. It’s listening to a child or an elderly person. It’s paying for someone else’s meal anonymously. It’s smiling and looking pleasant…like you have Jesus in your heart…because really you do.  

  In the movie, The Hobbit, Gandalf says, “Saruman (a wizard who goes to the dark side) believes that it is only great power that can hold evil in check. But that is not what I have found. I’ve found it is in the small things, everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keeps the darkness at bay. Simple acts of kindness and love.” 

  Making a difference isn’t the big things, it’s the little acts of kindness. Real love is empowered by God, who loves everyone. We would do well to mentally picture these words on the forehead of everyone that we meet: “For whom Christ died.” If God loves everyone, then He’s our source of power to love anyone. Love takes time, empathy, and the discovery of who others are. The power to love everyone is not from us. It comes from our relationship with the God who loved us when we were unlovable, because He loved us we can love anyone.

  Recently, I read of a 19-year-old Christian girl in China who was beaten and thrown into a filthy cell. It was dark, but from the smell, she knew that the slimy floor was covered with human excrement. There was no bed or chair. She had to sit and sleep in this filth. She squatted down so that as little of her bleeding body as possible would touch the floor and silently gave thanks to the Lord that she was worthy to suffer for Him. She asked Him for wisdom and strength, not to get out of this terrible place, but that wherever He put her, she would be able to continue to share the gospel.

  One day as she quietly sang a hymn, the Lord impressed on her, “This is to be your ministry.” She thought, “I’m all alone. Whom can I witness to?” Suddenly an idea came to her. She stood up and called for the guard.

  “Sir, can I do some hard labor for you?” The guard looked at her with contempt, mingled with surprise. No one had ever made that kind of request before. She said, “Look, this prison is filthy. Let me go into the cells and clean up the excrement. Just give me some water and a brush.”

  Soon she found herself on her hands and knees cleaning and sharing the gospel with people who’d lost all hope of ever seeing another human being who did not come to beat them. When they realized that they could have eternal life as God’s free gift, they repented of their sins and trusted in Jesus Christ. Soon all of the prisoners had believed in Jesus Christ. The warden was furious. He gave her a sheet of paper and told her to write out a confession of her crimes against the revolution. She wrote out the plan of salvation so that the warden and even others heard about Christ.

  You and I will probably never have to suffer for the gospel as she did, but we must follow her example. If we face cruel words, oppression or persecution, we should respond with love, kindness, and serving others. We must respond with grace. And we should be unstoppable in our commitment to the Lord’s work in the world, of proclaiming the good news of Christ to those who are perishing.

  God loves the world. Jesus died to save it. Let’s you and I commit to being Jesus even to those who hate Him and us?

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.  

Kindness

“Cold words freeze people, and hot words scorch them, and bitter words make them bitter, and wrathful words make them wrathful. Kind words also produce their image on men’s souls; and a beautiful image it is. They smooth, and quiet, and comfort the hearer.” Blaise Pascal

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon.com, was ten years old when he saw a commercial stating that every puff a smoker took on a cigarette shortened his or her life by two minutes. Even back then he was quite a math whiz, so he began adding up how many minutes a long-time smoker like his grandmother had lost to cigarettes. To his surprise, Jeff’s grandmother began to cry when he announced that she had lost sixteen years of her life to smoking.

  His grandfather took him aside for a talking to. To Jeff’s surprise, his grandfather was not angry, nor did he attempt to punish him. He simply said, “You’ll learn one day that it is much harder to be kind than to be clever.”

  My mentor and quasi adopted Dad, Pastor David Cummins, taught me a lot of things. His investment helped prepare me for ministry. One thing he said has always stuck with me and I’ve often shared it with others. On one occasion he told me, “Scott, I’ve never regretted being too kind.”  

  That’s stuck with me for over four decades. I can attest to the accuracy of those words – I’ve never regretted being too kind. To be sure, there have been a few times that I have been taken advantage of and that’s okay. And more than I want to remember, there have been too many times when I was unkind. Yet, in all of my life, I have never regretted being too kind.

  Kindness is so rare today. We value toughness and meanness. Rarely, do we value kindness. Our culture emphasizes self-promotion and achievement rather than being kind and caring for others. Showing kindness isn’t seen as a priority. It’s often viewed as a weakness. Even for those of us who believe that kindness is a good thing, we’re so preoccupied with our own problems and priorities to make time to invest in and show kindness to each other.

  Perhaps the most surprising aspect of God is His kindness. Kindness doesn’t line up with our preconceptions of a Supreme being or the Creator of the universe. We’d expect that He would be powerful and all-knowing, and maybe even have a mean side. Afterall, many powerful people that we know are known more for toughness and meanness, not kindness. We foolishly equate power and even being a leader with toughness and meanness. Kindness is reserved for Mother Teresa types or Boy Scouts, not those who want to have power or lead.

  A perfect example of true kindness was the Lord Jesus. Huge crowds followed Him and traveled miles just to hear Him speak. Healing the sick, feeding the hungry, teaching the people, caring for the widow, and defending children, Jesus lived 33 years of perfect kindness.

  He doesn’t ask any more of us than what He willingly practiced when He walked this earth. Even on the cross, He displayed compassionate, merciful kindness praying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Defending the weak, poor, and needy, He stated, “As you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”

  Jesus was perfectly selfless in everything He did. Flowing unceasingly from Him, kindness was His lifestyle. He took notice of the cause of the needy, intentionally, and consistently seeking them out, even when He was tired and weary. Without partiality, He was kind to everyone, even if they didn’t “deserve” it. He turned no one away. And by the shedding of his blood on the cross, He demonstrated His love for the entirety of humanity – the ultimate act of kindness. Christ is the perfect role model of kindness.

  Too many of His professed followers though are unkind. Is it any wonder that those outside the Church don’t want our faith? If our Christianity hasn’t radically changed us, what have we got to offer them?

  What does biblical kindness look like? It looks like Jesus. Not for just a season or one day of the year, kindness is for every moment of every day; it’s a habit, a lifestyle, a continual practice. It’s intentional, taking time and patience, a giving of ourselves in “the busy,” even when we’re “too tired.”

   Just being nice for many would be a great starting point. It would entail friendliness, politeness, personal warmth, thoughtfulness, respectfulness, courtesy, and consideration of others. It would mean more smiles than scowls, more laughter than anger, more encouragement than scorn. Most of us could benefit from striving towards the baby steps of the “nice-ness” level of kindness.

  Most of us need to practice kindness so that it becomes our default setting. There’s no better place to start practicing than at home. It begins with our words and tones. As we practice kindness and thoughtfulness with our families, it becomes easier to share when we leave home. Maybe our motto should be: “Kindness – don’t leave home without it.”  

  Kindness can be as simple as a smile (or in our mask times), kind words to a clerk as we check out. It’s a gentle question, “How are you today?” even with complete strangers. It’s holding open a door for someone.

  It’s rarely the big things. More often it’s the little acts that are like oil for smooth relationships. We’ve all experienced them. They warm our hearts, bring a smile to our face and stick with us all day, sometimes for years.

  As you and I intentionally choose to show kindness, the light of the Lord Jesus shines out of us to a harsh world in desperate need of our Savior, a generation in need of love, grace, and kindness. If others talk about us, may it be that they talk about us being filled with kindness. Please be Jesus to someone today and every day. Make the Savior your role model and kindness your lifestyle.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Try a Little Kindness!

“A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve.”

Joseph Joubert

Okay, I’m as confused as everyone else on why there was a buying frenzy on toilet paper. Yet, I totally understand why all of the frozen pizzas, chicken nuggets, hot dogs and other easy to cook items were scooped up.

  Once the announcement was made about schools being closed, many parents reacted. This was the thinking of many: “I have to go to work. My kids have to eat while I’m working. The only thing that I feel comfortable with my kids cooking is pizza or chicken nuggets and the only thing my kids will eat without me standing over them is pizza or chicken nuggets.”

  It made total sense to me. We’re in the midst of a crisis. This is the Pearl Harbor of this generation. It’s unchartered territory for the whole world. It’s a time for compassion, acceptance, and boatloads of patience. We’ve never been this way before. Every step forward is new and unknown.

  It’s like waiting for a hurricane. You don’t know what category it is going to be. The worst is a Category 5. Listening to the media, you’d think that this one is going to be a Category 50. You don’t know when or where it will make landfall. You don’t know what it will destroy or potentially how many it will kill, and you don’t know how long it is all going to last. So how can we show compassion in such tumultuous times?

  Give others the benefit of the doubt. Imagine that I see a woman buying 10 pizzas at Walmart. It’d be easy to think that she’s selfish and hoarding. What I may not know is that she’s a single Mom with a couple of kids at home. In spite of all the isolation recommendations, she still has to go to her factory job or they’ll end up on the street.

  Protagoras, the ancient Greek philosopher said, “Man is the measure of all things.” In spite of the fact that he was wrong, too many have altered his statement to: “I am the measure of all things.” We evaluate what others should do or shouldn’t do by what we do. That’s arrogant. We jump to conclusions, yet rarely have all of the facts. Our limited knowledge though doesn’t keep us from pontificating or bragging about what we’d do or even what great, kind people we are. We’re a nation of armchair quarterbacks and second guessers. The only true standard of moral right and wrong is the Bible, God’s Word. Most of our decisions are subjective ones, and with a crisis such as this, with very limited knowledge.

  Clearly, it was immoral for the Chinese government to suppress the warnings of this epidemic. It barely made the news and by most has now been forgotten. Early on though, Dr. Li Wenliang contracted the virus while working at Wuhan Central Hospital. He did the right thing and what a medical professional is supposed to do and sent out a warning to fellow medics back in December. But Chinese police told him to stop “making false comments,” then pushed forward with plans for Chinese New Year. That’s immoral. Many are dying because of their evil deception.

  Yet, how to now respond to this is difficult and subjective. No one, as far as I know, believes the virus can be stopped. The best hope is to slow it down so it won’t overwhelm our medical resources. Unless someone is clearly violating a moral right or wrong, because we’re all sorting through how to respond, we should graciously give others the benefit of the doubt.

  Be gracious rather than oversensitive. Someone recently was a bit offended that I wouldn’t shake their hand. When we were in Taiwan two years ago, I was surprised at how many wore face masks as part of normal life. Because this is new and unknown, people are frightened and stressed. You may have noticed that people are driving more aggressively and more in a hurry than normal. More are on their phones in stores, checking in to make sure that they don’t miss something that’s needed. Or, to get suggestions on alternatives when the item they were to buy is unavailable.

  Fear results in a drop in normal people skills. Clerks in the stores are tired and often have been verbally nuked by stressed-out shoppers. People are worried about their jobs and finances. Look at most people’s faces when you go out and you’ll see the strain and stress. Rather, than being self-focused, this is an opportunity for us as believers to live out Philippians 2:3-4: “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests but also to the interests of others.”

  In the midst of scaremongering, it’s time for caremongering. Scaremongering with this crisis is a huge problem. Let’s be part of turning that around. Facebook, texting, and emails are lower forms of communication when people are isolated. Harried parents with children at home need someone just to listen, not necessarily give solutions. Those who are isolated and frightened need to hear a caring, kind voice. A short five-minute conversation to touch base and see how someone is doing can make a huge difference.

  Share hope, not despair. The only way to move from despair to hope is to look up, turning our focus from problems to our loving Heavenly Father. Instead of being anthropocentric, we must be theocentric. God doesn’t change. He’s already taken care of our biggest problem – sin. The One Who sent His Son, Jesus, to die in our place, and raised Him back to life by His omnipotent power, can be trusted with our future. We serve a mighty God Who is faithful.

  Constant remembrance is a necessary habit for the people of God, particularly during times of distress. It’s not enough though to remember what God has done, we are to be sharers of His hope. It’s the greatest act of compassion we can give a hopeless world. We know that all those who know Jesus will get Home before dark. We must share that hope. Our friends and family members who are hopeless can have that same hope if they will trust in the only One who died to give us hope and security.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.