Kindness

“Cold words freeze people, and hot words scorch them, and bitter words make them bitter, and wrathful words make them wrathful. Kind words also produce their image on men’s souls; and a beautiful image it is. They smooth, and quiet, and comfort the hearer.” Blaise Pascal

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon.com, was ten years old when he saw a commercial stating that every puff a smoker took on a cigarette shortened his or her life by two minutes. Even back then he was quite a math whiz, so he began adding up how many minutes a long-time smoker like his grandmother had lost to cigarettes. To his surprise, Jeff’s grandmother began to cry when he announced that she had lost sixteen years of her life to smoking.

  His grandfather took him aside for a talking to. To Jeff’s surprise, his grandfather was not angry, nor did he attempt to punish him. He simply said, “You’ll learn one day that it is much harder to be kind than to be clever.”

  My mentor and quasi adopted Dad, Pastor David Cummins, taught me a lot of things. His investment helped prepare me for ministry. One thing he said has always stuck with me and I’ve often shared it with others. On one occasion he told me, “Scott, I’ve never regretted being too kind.”  

  That’s stuck with me for over four decades. I can attest to the accuracy of those words – I’ve never regretted being too kind. To be sure, there have been a few times that I have been taken advantage of and that’s okay. And more than I want to remember, there have been too many times when I was unkind. Yet, in all of my life, I have never regretted being too kind.

  Kindness is so rare today. We value toughness and meanness. Rarely, do we value kindness. Our culture emphasizes self-promotion and achievement rather than being kind and caring for others. Showing kindness isn’t seen as a priority. It’s often viewed as a weakness. Even for those of us who believe that kindness is a good thing, we’re so preoccupied with our own problems and priorities to make time to invest in and show kindness to each other.

  Perhaps the most surprising aspect of God is His kindness. Kindness doesn’t line up with our preconceptions of a Supreme being or the Creator of the universe. We’d expect that He would be powerful and all-knowing, and maybe even have a mean side. Afterall, many powerful people that we know are known more for toughness and meanness, not kindness. We foolishly equate power and even being a leader with toughness and meanness. Kindness is reserved for Mother Teresa types or Boy Scouts, not those who want to have power or lead.

  A perfect example of true kindness was the Lord Jesus. Huge crowds followed Him and traveled miles just to hear Him speak. Healing the sick, feeding the hungry, teaching the people, caring for the widow, and defending children, Jesus lived 33 years of perfect kindness.

  He doesn’t ask any more of us than what He willingly practiced when He walked this earth. Even on the cross, He displayed compassionate, merciful kindness praying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Defending the weak, poor, and needy, He stated, “As you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”

  Jesus was perfectly selfless in everything He did. Flowing unceasingly from Him, kindness was His lifestyle. He took notice of the cause of the needy, intentionally, and consistently seeking them out, even when He was tired and weary. Without partiality, He was kind to everyone, even if they didn’t “deserve” it. He turned no one away. And by the shedding of his blood on the cross, He demonstrated His love for the entirety of humanity – the ultimate act of kindness. Christ is the perfect role model of kindness.

  Too many of His professed followers though are unkind. Is it any wonder that those outside the Church don’t want our faith? If our Christianity hasn’t radically changed us, what have we got to offer them?

  What does biblical kindness look like? It looks like Jesus. Not for just a season or one day of the year, kindness is for every moment of every day; it’s a habit, a lifestyle, a continual practice. It’s intentional, taking time and patience, a giving of ourselves in “the busy,” even when we’re “too tired.”

   Just being nice for many would be a great starting point. It would entail friendliness, politeness, personal warmth, thoughtfulness, respectfulness, courtesy, and consideration of others. It would mean more smiles than scowls, more laughter than anger, more encouragement than scorn. Most of us could benefit from striving towards the baby steps of the “nice-ness” level of kindness.

  Most of us need to practice kindness so that it becomes our default setting. There’s no better place to start practicing than at home. It begins with our words and tones. As we practice kindness and thoughtfulness with our families, it becomes easier to share when we leave home. Maybe our motto should be: “Kindness – don’t leave home without it.”  

  Kindness can be as simple as a smile (or in our mask times), kind words to a clerk as we check out. It’s a gentle question, “How are you today?” even with complete strangers. It’s holding open a door for someone.

  It’s rarely the big things. More often it’s the little acts that are like oil for smooth relationships. We’ve all experienced them. They warm our hearts, bring a smile to our face and stick with us all day, sometimes for years.

  As you and I intentionally choose to show kindness, the light of the Lord Jesus shines out of us to a harsh world in desperate need of our Savior, a generation in need of love, grace, and kindness. If others talk about us, may it be that they talk about us being filled with kindness. Please be Jesus to someone today and every day. Make the Savior your role model and kindness your lifestyle.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

When "Lost" is real...

“Discernment itself is rooted in the understanding that there is good and bad, that there are God’s ways and other ways. A secular worldview, on the other hand, teaches that truth exists along a continuum. Truth is subjective; it is relative.”    Tim Challies

  Several weeks after hearing this true story, I’m still chuckling. Back in mid-July, three women were stranded overnight on the banks of the Muskegon River in Western Michigan after a first-time tubing trip. What started out as a fun-filled float down the river, turned into a nightmarish 20+ hour ordeal. The three, all in their 20s, set out around 4 p.m. on July 12^th. 24 hours later, they had to be rescued by local fire officials. According to Deputy Fire Chief Bob Grabinski, “They went and bought some tubes and they went to the Maple Island Bridge, which is one of the access points to the river, a popular spot. They were misinformed: Somebody said (the river) makes a big loop and they’d come right back to their car.” Unfortunately, they didn’t understand basic geography.

  “They thought it was great,” Grabinski said of the alleged circular river. “They believed it.” The threesome set out on what was expected to be a quick, easy trip. Right about dark they realized that wasn’t the case. They got off the river onto the bank and began screaming for help, but were in an isolated area. Nobody was going to hear their screams. To further complicate matters, they had no food, shelter and were in swimsuits. As they were out on the water, they didn’t bring a cellphone. It was sheer chance they were rescued the next day, about three miles from where they’d launched. A fisherman happened to hear them and called 911.

  When first responders found them, they were in good spirits, though they had scratches from trying to walk through some thorny-type bushes and lots of bug bites. Emergency personnel took them back to their vehicle, where it was determined their body temperatures were slightly lower than normal. They were advised to get checked out at a hospital. Since they declined transportation by ambulance, officials didn’t know if they followed up for medical treatment. But their tubing days are over. According to Grabinski. “They said, ‘I will never do this again’.”  

  “Somebody said (the river) makes a big loop and they’d come right back to their car.” Your Mom told you, “Don’t believe everything you hear,” yet, most do believe everything they hear. We’re told satisfaction comes from the material and physical, temporal world stuff – pleasure, popularity, wealth, a life of ease. It doesn’t. Should we really be surprised when the people of this world “believe everything they hear”? For them, this world is all there is. Life is limited to a horizontal perspective.

  What’s heartbreaking though is when Christians, those of us who are otherworldly, who’s life doesn’t end with our last breath “believe everything we hear.” We’d be wise to periodically read the book of Ecclesiastes. It’s the emptiness and exasperation of a man attempting to find meaning and satisfaction by “believing everything he’s heard.”

  These women would have saved themselves a frightening night and public shame, if they’d just consulted a map. A little basic knowledge of geography would have spared them lots of embarrassment.

  Know something even more foolish? Christians who know God, yet rarely, if ever consult His roadmap for this life and the next. What do you really know? What would you or even others say you’re an expert at? Truly proficient at? More importantly, does it matter? Will it make a difference in this life and more importantly the next?

  There’s no question that Richard Dawkins, famed British biologist and atheist, is a genius. Jeff Bezos of Amazon is a brilliant entrepreneur. Usain Bolt is one of today’s greatest athletes. But in a mere fifty years, will it matter? In eternity, none of that will even be on the level of the importance of navel lint. How can we make our lives matter? How can we be people of wisdom? Wonderfully, it’s not a secret for the elite few.

  Study and apply God’s Word to your life. Americans prize knowledge. It’s not enough to know truth. We must practice it. We must apply it to life. Wisdom only begins with knowledge. Every believer should spend time in God’s Word nearly every day. Ask God for wisdom (James 1:5) to understand what you read. Ask the Spirit to apply God’s truth to your life.

  Please don’t attend church…come to worship. Sitting in a geography class wouldn’t have helped these three women unless they listened, learned and applied it to life. Sitting in a church service physically without engaging mentally and most of all, spiritually can get you stranded in life.

  Participate in a group Bible study. Too many of us too highly esteem our own counsel. Just read Facebook, opinions on a blog, or listen to talk radio. One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 17:28, “Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.”

  Currently, I’m reading The Wright Brothers by David McCullough. It’s amazing how much outside counsel those two brothers sought out. Their success in flying literally came from soaring on the wings of others.

  The same is true spiritually. As we engage with others, as we study and work through God’s Word, we all grow. We’re all stretched.

  Some of the most ignorant individuals you’ll meet are those who only listen to their own counsel. Many a married couple blunders along because they’ve just talked to each other, rather than seeking outside godly advice. Christianity is not a solo sport. Each of us needs to surround ourselves with godly friends who will “speak the truth in love” in our lives.   

  God has called us to an upper path of spiritual progress – sanctification. It happens as we’re in the Word, under biblical teaching, interacting with other brothers and sisters, and obediently applying His truth to our daily lives. Far too many of us are satisfied with just going in circles.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.