It's NOT about the "fish"

“We think of missionaries as God's ‘super servants,’ Jesus’ Navy Seals. The word ‘missionary’ is never used in the Bible, however, not even once. That’s because all of God’s people are sent; all of God’s people are commanded to go. There is no ‘special class’ of sent ones.” J.D. Greear

 

  Okay, I’ll confess. I’m not a bumper sticker person. Hopefully this won’t offend you, but I’m also not a Christian t-shirt person. It’s just that I know myself. Too often my actions and tongue are in motion far ahead of my brain and heart. I’m still working on the sanctification of my right foot. While I’m not what’s dubbed an aggressive driver, I’m an offensive one. I learned to drive in Chicago…sometimes it still shows. And I don’t wear Christian t-shirts because my mouth can leap ahead of my heart.

  My family still remembers the time that I’d had enough of a guy giving me grief and I called him in front of God and everybody, a “Twit.” It wasn’t my finest hour. Later I apologized to him for losing my cool.

  Maybe you know of it happening, but I’ve never heard of a motorist being flagged down by another driver who was convicted by the sight of a fish on the back bumper. Nor am I aware of anyone who asked the wearer to tell them about Jesus because they saw their Christian t-shirt. More than we want to admit, we’re bad advertisements for Jesus instead of good ones.

  Please understand, as Christians, we’re not perfect. The Bible is clear though that if we know Jesus, we should be very different from those who don’t know the Lord (2 Cor. 5:17) There should be areas of our lives, that to a non-believer, are totally unexplainable. Let me suggest three.

  Peace. Peace is an increasingly rare commodity in our raging world, yet everyone wants it. Many spend lots of time and money attempting to somehow artificially manufacture it. A quest for peace is the motivation behind the addiction epidemic. Everyone wants true peace, yet few have it.

  When others see it, it makes them curious: How could you sit there and just take it? Doesn’t that scare you? Don’t you hate her? You forgave him? Aren’t you worried? Do you realize what’s at stake? How do you sleep at night? You’re going to sue, aren’t you? How can you be so calm?

  Being a person of peace always stands out. While peace and joy are benefits of being a believer, they’re not just for our benefit. They’re beacons in our lives that create curiosity, causing others to pause and wonder. Peace and joy demonstrate the authenticity of our faith. God brings dark circumstances in our lives to give peace and joy an opportunity to shine brighter than normal. Most folk around us pursue “happiness.” Peace and joy are God’s gifts freely bestowed on us at salvation. We don’t pursue them. We accept them as gifts from our Heavenly Father. Because we have peace and joy, we can be okay on both the outside and inside.

  So, how’s your peace these days? Would others want the peace and joy that you have? Would they know that you know the Prince of Peace?

  Healthy Relationships. Ours is a relationally challenged world. Very few couples or families know how to, much less have, healthy relationships. Many have relationships with cyber friends, yet continually bicker with those with whom they share physical space. Dysfunction abounds. People are disillusioned and desperate relationally. They squeeze those around them for as much love and acceptance as they can, but still come up very short. But then, they see a husband and wife who love each other with a healthy marriage. A loving family stands out, one where siblings actually get along and adult children enjoy and long to go home for the holidays.

  It forces them to ask questions: Why them and not me? How did they get there? What’s their secret? Are they for real or is it a façade? They’re so lucky? I wonder what they’re like behind closed doors?

  It’s why it’s vital that we seek to live biblically and problem-solve in our marriages and family. Strong marriages are rare. Loving, healthy families are a sad exception. All of the trappings of success – a huge house, nice car, lots of toys, out of this world vacations – never bring soul satisfaction. Being a big deal at work with bad relationships at home is a vacuous life. Those with healthy relationships often find that others are watching. Others notice when relationships are robust and want to know what you have.

  Character. A shrinking minority know what character is. Few have actually met or observed someone with character. Instead, everyone is suspect. When the average person meets someone who appears to have character, they’re suspicious…cynical. They assume there’s duplicity or a hidden agenda. Character is rare and it’s hard to believe that it’s authentic.

  Character is who are you are when no one is looking. It means doing what’s right, as God defines right, regardless of personal cost. Because character is so rare, it makes some feel uncomfortable. They don’t know how to handle it. It goes against the amoral, non-absolutism of our society.

  A Christian is to be a person of character. To be blunt, you can sleep around and still be a good surgeon. You can cheat on your mate and have little trouble continuing to practice law. You can be a successful salesperson and cheat on your taxes. But you can’t do those things if you’re a Christian and continue to enjoy God’s blessing. Compromise makes us unblessable. Christians are to have character. When it’s real, others notice.

  If no one is wondering what makes you different, maybe it’s because you’re not. Being a “missionary” means letting God’s light shine through you. It would be good if Christians started praying something like this: “Father, let my light shine before others in such a way that they may see my good works, and glorify my Father who is heaven” (Matthew 5:16)? It’s time for Christians to stop only asking God for His blessing and protection. We must get back on mission and ask God to use us and to shine His light through us. Pray that He’ll shine His light through you, and your marriage and family! Others are watching. Hopefully, they see peace, healthy relationships and character. Hopefully, they see Jesus in you! 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Disciples or Followers?

“The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. ‘Tis the difference between the lightning bug

and the lightning.”  Mark Twain

  Even a single word has the power to move people forward or backward. Using the right words can inspire, embrace, acknowledge, intrigue, validate, and include others in a godly, positive way.  A word, even only one word, can make a vast difference.

  Picture this scene: You’re in the checkout line at Walmart and it’s very crowded. A big snow storm is coming and everyone is in a hurry. You have fifteen items in your cart and can’t wait to go through the line to get home. Someone though taps you on the shoulder and says, “Can I go in front of you? I only have seven items and I’m in a hurry.” Just picture your response.

  Now, picture the same scene. Again a tap on your shoulder with the same question, “Can I get in front of you because I just got a call from the school nurse that my son is sick. I only have seven items.” Which scene is more likely to change your behavior and motivate you to move aside?

  Social psychologist, Ellen Langer tested this type of situation and discovered that adding that one word because made a major difference. She tested this in many situations. When you add because, and a reason, people are more apt to do what you request. The bottom line – one word can make a big difference.

  Last Sunday we announced that we’ve changed one word in our purpose statement. Previously our purpose statement said: Grace Church exists to glorify our Heavenly Father by continually making more disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ. Recently, our church leadership decided to change one word. We’ve changed “disciples” to “followers.” Why? Why did we believe that this was an important change? Because “followers” denotes forward movement as you follow Christ. You can’t follow without moving.

  So, are we splitting hairs? Perhaps a bit. Yet, we live in a day when many profess to be Christians and would be very comfortable with the label “disciple,” yet never grow, change or move spiritually forward.

  Many Christians think that being a Christian simply means that you call yourself one or are associated with a certain church or denomination. At most you attend church regularly, give financially and occasionally serve.

  The New Testament teaches that being a Christian is to be life-altering. It’s to be nothing short of a personal revolution. While the New Testament does teach that we should faithfully attend worship services and be a member of a church, one can easily be part of a church without having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Every week professing Christians go in one door of their church and leave the same way. The tragedy is that they’re the same person that went in. True worship means that there is life change. A “disciple” could do their religious thing each week with no forward movement. A Christ-follower could not.

  Because of our focus on education in American culture, often we’re satisfied with teaching and even learning the right things. A disciple can be content to be a student. In fact, our churches are filled with those who have heads brimming over with biblical facts. But God does not want us to be just learners. As James 1:22 says, “Do not merely listen to the Word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”

  Many Christians are little more than professional students. They know so many facts about the Bible and about God, but there is little or no life change. One can’t be a follower without life change.

  A Christ-follower is described for us in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here.” If you’re a Christ-follower, there will be clear changes. C. S. Lewis wisely said, “If conversion makes no improvements in a man’s outward actions then I think his ‘conversion’ was largely imaginary.”

  In other words, a Christ-follower is to both be with Jesus and be like Jesus. We spend time with Jesus as we read the Bible, pray, worship with fellow believers at church. Authentic, growing Christ-followers are always focused on spending more and more time with the Lord, letting His Spirit guide our study of His written Word, spending time in His presence in worship, spending time in prayer.

  Following means that it changes both our thinking and our actions. Because we are Christ-followers we respond differently to the inevitable trials and tribulations of life. We know that there are no accidents and that our Lord is Sovereign. As Christ-followers, we’re empowered and resist temptation in its various forms.

  A Christ-follower is someone who lives out exactly what Jesus taught in Matthew 5-7 in the Sermon on the Mount. Christ followers strive to be merciful, peaceful, forgiving, compassionate, strong in their faith, honoring the commandments, praying for their enemies, giving to those in need, constantly in prayer, free from worry and not filled with judgment.

  Jesus didn’t call us to wear a tag like “Christian.” No, He called us to become followers of Him. It’s easy to be labeled a “Christian,” because you go to church, or are pro-life, etc… Too often Christians are known for what they’re against. A Christ-follower though is known for who they are because the fruit of the Spirit is seen being produced in their lives as described in Galatians 5:22-23, “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control…”

  When Jesus said to His disciples, “Follow Me.” These two words contained radical implications for their lives. That’s really what it means to be a Christ-follower. It’s to live a life that a lost world would call radical. It’s selfless and sacrificial and stands in stark contrast to a self-absorbed world. As Dietrich Bonhoeffer so powerfully wrote, “When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.” That’s what it means to be a Christ-follower. It’s a death to self to follow the living Lord. Being a Christ-follower not only means to know Jesus and know about Him, it means to let His life flow through us so that we live like Jesus. Grace Church exists to glorify our Heavenly Father by continually making more followers of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Will YOU stop lying?

“Honesty may not always be the best policy, as a policy, but dishonesty is always a miserable policy, even when it succeeds.”   Iain Duguid

  You just can’t make this stuff up. In a recent debate between New York Governor Andrew Cuomo and his opponent, actress Cynthia Nixon, it became very heated as they battled for the Democratic primary nomination in the gubernatorial election. In one more contentious moments Cuomo demanded Nixon stop interrupting him, whereupon she said she would do so if he stopped lying. “Excuse me, can you stop interrupting?” Cuomo exclaimed. To which Nixon retorted, “Can you stop lying?” “Yeah, as soon as you do,” Cuomo responded as laughter erupted from the audience.

  Are you like me? When I hear promises or see accusations about a political opponent, I’m very skeptical. Please don’t get me wrong. There are some elected officials with integrity and a true commitment to honesty. It’s just that they seem to be very rare. Usually, I find them more often on the local level, rather than the national one.

  Much of it, I’m sure, is because I’m an adult child of an addict, but I have very little tolerance for lying. We survivors of an addicted parent were lied to so much in our formative years that it’s left a deep scar.

  Then, our culture has lost any value for honesty or truth. We’ve developed a litany of terms to soften lying: White lies. Fibs. Exaggerations. Ideology trumps truth. Yet, they’re still lies. In a court of law, it’s called perjury. They are falsehoods, fabrications and deceptions.

  As much as try, as much as we detest it – all of us have been guilty of lying. Lying is probably the most frequently committed sin. While we may put “degrees” on lying, it’s still a lie. We rationalize that “a little white lie” to save someone’s feelings isn’t that bad. After all, we’re just trying to make them feel good, right?

  Parents lie to children, thinking little of it, “No, this doesn’t have onions in it.” We lie to cover failure, “I’d have been here on time but the traffic was terrible.” As innocent as a lie may seem, with a holy God, there are no degrees of lying. ALL lies are sinful and violate His standard of truth.

  What many don’t realize is that lying is Satan’s native language. You and I are never more like the devil than when we lie. All that he does is lie. That should cause you to gasp! I know it does me. In John 8:44, Jesus is talking about Satan and states, “He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”

  The first time Satan speaks in the Bible, he lies to Eve. When we lie, we intentionally deceive. There’s usually a conscious decision made each time we do it. Because God is truth, when we lie, we’re in direct opposition to His will. Just as it cost our first parents so much, lying has a high price tag.

  Lying destroys relationships. After you’ve been lied to, you know how difficult it can be to trust that person again. You can’t help but wonder why a friend or family member would treat you so poorly. When you lie, even if you think others will never find out, you’ll create a chasm of hurt in your relationship. If the other person finds out about your lie, as they frequently do, it’s very difficult to regain trust. No one wants a relationship based on lies. Truth and trust are foundational to healthy relationships.

  Lying destroys YOU. It throws you into a vicious cycle that’s extremely difficult to break free of. Once you lie, often you’ll lie again to cover up the first lie. Then, you feel worse. Lies are like weeds. They grow, rarely standing alone. If you don’t kill the first lie, it mutates, reproducing and becoming hard to stop. Lying is addictive. You so habitually lie, you have difficulty knowing what’s actually true as you begin to lie to yourself.

  Liars become trapped in a cycle of lying controlled by fear. They’re anxious of not only being found out as a liar, but also being exposed and having the truth uncovered about themselves. And it always comes with a high price. Lying destroys lives. Relationships crumble. Others refuse to trust you. Ultimately, the one most hurt by lying is you.

  Tragically, because lying is socially acceptable and even encouraged, it’s only through God’s grace, the God of truth, that we can be consistently honest. How can we be people of honesty and integrity?

  Honesty must become a godly discipline, a spiritual habit. Each morning I pray that the Lord will give me wisdom for that day. Wisdom always includes honesty. As God gives me wisdom, I speak (and post) the truth.

  When you lie, deal with it immediately. It’s embarrassing, yet a noxious weed is easier to kill while it’s small. More than once, I’ve had to call up a friend and apologize that I’d exaggerated or not been completely forthright.  Healthy shame helps me in the future be more cautious with my words.

  Be committed to speaking the truth in love. That’s the biblical command and control we find in Ephesians 4:15. Friends sometimes must say the tough things. Some speak the truth, yet wield it like a baseball bat. Others speak with love, yet love void of truth is worthless sentimentality. Like the Lord Jesus, we must commit to speaking both truth and love.

  Please know that honesty will probably cost you. It certainly cost professional golfer, Brian Davis…perhaps up to $2 million. In 2010 at the Verizon Heritage Classic, Davis thought that he’d inadvertently ticked a reed in his backswing, so he called over rules officials to review the video. He had. It cost him the Masters and countless endorsement bonuses. 

  You can’t be a Christian and be a liar (Revelation 21:8). Jesus said, “I am the Truth.” To follow Him, we must live by His standard of truth telling.

  In our culture tolerance is the norm. “Truth” is subjective. It’s purported that there are no absolutes. Being sincere is what really matters.

  That’s all a lie. As the people of the God of absolute truth, we know truth is the norm. There is a right and there is a wrong. There are absolutes. One can be sincere and sincerely wrong. Truth is always truth, always has been and always will be. Truth never changes. As Christ-followers, we must commit to being people of truth, no matter what!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Are YOU connected?

“A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a

college education.”  Theodore Roosevelt

  True story – three women were visiting Bellevue, Washington and were out after midnight, unable to find their way back to their hotel. After asking their GPS to re-route them, they took what they thought was a road that would lead them to the highway. Instead, their SUV ended up sinking into deep water. It seems that the “road” turned out to be a boat launch, and the water a lake. All three managed to get out safely, but by the time the tow truck arrived, the SUV was completely submerged.

  I’ve had that experience too, though not nearly as serious. Some years ago I remember my GPS directing me deeper and deeper into a subdivision for the local Walmart. It quickly became apparent that the GPS was wrong and I never did find the Walmart.

  Think about this. When do you need a map or GPS? When you’re going somewhere you have never been. When it comes to life and eternity, we are all traveling somewhere we have never been.

  Last week school started locally. Students entered new grades. Some entered college for the first time or a new stage in college. All of us are continually moving into new phases of life. We move from being single to marriage, to having kids to having teens, to having an empty nest to having married adult children, to having grandchildren to having great-grandchildren. Every part of life has a new season from education to work to a career. It happens with housing. Most couples start small and rent, yet will finally move to owning a home.

  Life is in a constant state of change. Heraclitus, the Greek philosopher, was correct, “No man ever steps into the same river twice for its not the same river and he’s not the same man.”

  At Grace, we believe without apology in Sola Scriptura. That simply means that all truth necessary for our eternal salvation and spiritual life is taught either explicitly or implicitly in Scripture. It’s not a claim that all truth of every kind is found in Scripture. For example, Scripture has little or nothing to say about DNA structures, microbiology or even the rules of Chinese grammar. Scripture though is a “more sure Word,” standing above all other truth in its authority and certainty.

  We believe every person should first study God’s Word for themselves (2 Timothy 2:15). Yet, what’s lost in an individualistic culture is the vital importance of group Bible study. The model of group study and learning permeates God’s Word. Jesus chose 12 disciples to teach and do life with. The Apostles traveled, studied, prayed and did mission work as a team. God designed the local church to be a family, a body, an army – to name just a few New Testament metaphors.

  When we study in a group, we profit from multiple insights and perspectives. The amount of combined knowledge and experience will be broader than when we study on our own. We gain much by learning from others. We also serve others by sharing our own knowledge and experience. It opens up a place for us for discussion and application of what we’re learning. As we share what we’re learning, it becomes more imbedded in our hearts. We can ask each other questions, share real-life stories of how Scripture has transformed us and share struggles of faith.

  God never intended Christianity to be a “me, God, and my Bible” lifestyle. We’re designed for community. God’s Word teaches that we greatly need each other. What are some benefits of group Bible study?

  In a group we realize that others have similar struggles and problems. We often think there’s something uniquely wrong with us. When we hear that others have similar struggles, we feel both relieved and encouraged.

  In a group we can encourage each other in our faith. The Apostle Paul taught us that when we see the faith in another believer, it encourages us in our own (Romans 1:12). In a group, people share personal insights and testimonies. As we share, others see new ways they can draw closer to God and new steps they can take with others.

  Change is hard. There’s nothing like a word of encouragement when someone feels hopeless or discouraged. Members of a study group support one another, both during meetings and outside of them (2 Corinthians 1:4).

  In a group we can use the spiritual gifts that God has entrusted to us to minister to each other. God never intended spiritual leaders to do all of the ministering. He’s given each of us gifts and talents to encourage, teach, and challenge one another. Group Bible studies provide an ideal setting for Christians to minister to each other (Hebrews 10:24).

  In a group we help hold each other accountable. When someone announces he or she plans to work on making a change, others in the group may ask how it’s going the next time they’re together. It can be done in a positive, encouraging way. Or, group members may make a plan to be accountable to each other. As Proverbs 27:17 says, “iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Then, when members know that they have an upcoming meeting, they’re motivated to prepare and do their “homework.”

  In a group we pray with and for each other. God honors and answers prayer. As we begin to pull back the masks, we become more transparent and are more deeply connected with each other. Then, we’re more open to praying for each other. We begin to share burdens and prayer requests or even become prayer partners  (Matthew 18:20).

  In a group we help each other in tough times. Periodically, all of us feel isolated, alone or frightened when facing health, emotional, family, financial or spiritual problems. Group members help provide a “safety net,” supporting one another through those hard times. Too many Christians lack close friends. When believers get together in a smaller group, close friendships form and often remain long after the group ends. 

  God said, “It’s not good to be alone,” so don’t be! Join a group Bible study!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Improving Your Serve!

“Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can and as long as you can.” John Wesley

    Did you hear the story about the set of identical twin boys born in Rome? They were given up for adoption immediately. One of the identical twins was taken to Spain where he was named, “Juan.” The other was taken to Saudi Arabia and he was named, “Amahl.” Juan and Amahl never knew each other during their lives, but when they became young men, they began to trace their roots and each discovered that he had a twin brother. So, they arranged to meet their biological families in Rome. It was an exciting day for all of the family members. They were at the airport as Juan arrived. They were so happy to see Juan; they greeted him as their long lost relative! Somehow though Amahl’s plane was running late, so, they had to leave. Somebody said, “You wait here and when Amahl arrives, bring him to our family reunion. They said, “Well, I’ve never seen Amahl before. How in the world will I recognize him?” They said, “That’s easy! If you have seen Juan you have seen Amahl!”

  In the Christian life, in the Church, there is no such thing as spiritual identical twins. We are all unique. No one is exactly alike. That’s why it’s so important for you to know that each believer is a gifted child of God. When you came to Christ, God gifted you to serve the Lord (1 Peter 4:10). Yet, how we serve the Lord falls into some typical categories.

   Some don’t serve. One pastor periodically noted by a name on his membership list in his study the letters “FBPO.” A friend’s curiosity got the best of him so finally he asked what “FBPO” meant. The pastor replied, “That means, ‘For burial purposes only.’ They’re a member of this church, but they don’t come. They don’t give. They don’t serve. Their name is on this church roll just so when they’re buried, their obituary will say, “He was a member of _______ Church.” FBPO. Every church has professing believers where we’d have to write FBPO beside their name. But there’s no retirement program this side of eternity. We’re saved to serve (Eph. 2:10). In the New Testament a local church is compared to a body. Every body part has a purpose. It’s also compared to a building. Every piece has a place. If someone is not serving and using their spiritual gift, one might as well write FBPO over his/her life. They’re disobedient and missing God’s calling on their life. It’s not safe to not use the gifts God has given you, as Jesus pointed out in His parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30).

  It’s tragic to watch the Lord chasten a believer that refuses to use what God has entrusted to them. There are also some telling symptoms of someone sitting on the sidelines. Typically, they’re sporadic in attendance, yet tend to be petty and critical. As they have little investment in the work of God, seemingly they justify it by fault-finding. Life for them is a selfie, yet it comes at a high price. Believers are saved to serve. Those who won’t often struggle with depression, loneliness and poor self-esteem. It’s nearly impossible to be emotionally healthy when one is self-absorbed.

  My friend, Scott Ziegler, bluntly says to such folk who attend his church, “If you’re not going to give or serve, please go somewhere else and leave that space for a lost person or someone who’s going to get involved.” 

  Some primarily serve reciprocally. It’s tempting to limit yourself to reciprocal service, yet you miss out on so much. Add to that, it obstructs your spiritual growth. Those who serve reciprocally serve in the nursery, children’s ministries, etc.…as long as they have children involved in those ministries. Afterwards, you’ll hear things like, “I did my time. It’s someone else’s turn.” Even older adults will focus on older adult ministries to serve.

  The Bible teaches that a church is a family. Every member is vital and needs to be involved in serving others. It’s why at Grace, we look for avenues for even children to be involved in service. And we encourage, where it’s appropriate, for parents to have their children serve alongside of them. Our sinful nature is narcissistic. Serving helps inoculate us against this malady. When I serve others where there’s no “payback,” it’s more easily done for God’s glory alone.

  A wonderful minority serve sacrificially. This is the biblical model. Someone who serves sacrificially serves as Jesus did. Only in eternity will their investment be fully rewarded. Like Jesus, they serve outside of their comfort zones. Think about it. What was “comfortable” about leaving heaven to come to earth in the Incarnation. What was comfortable about washing His disciples’ feet.

  The Christian life isn’t about playing it safe. The cross wasn’t safe. It’s about risk and putting it all on the line. Serving outside of our comfort spaces helps us grow in faith, as we’re more dependent on God’s enabling. We know too, the good that takes place is only of the Lord because we didn’t have it in ourselves. In nearly every church you know who these godly individuals are. If you ask, “Who are some of the most Christlike individuals in your church?” Invariably, their names come up.

  Every Christian can “help.” One spiritual gift listed out in 1 Corinthians 12:28 that’s available for every Christian is labeled “helping.” Even the youngest believer can “help.” It can be anything from picking up trash, setting-up or tearing down for a church function, watching children for a single parent, or helping someone move, or doing yardwork for a senior citizen. It could be as simple as dropping a note of encouragement. One of our best means of helping is prayer. We can all pray. Sometimes that’s the best help, particularly when we don’t know how to help, like when a friend has lost a loved one or is going through a time of suffering. 

  John Piper wrote a small yet powerful book every Christian should read, Don’t waste your life! Please don’t waste your life. Choose to serve. Invest in something that will count for eternity. Glorify God and show your gratitude for His great love to you by serving Him and serving others!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Who's coming to your funeral?

“I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.”

Helen Keller

  Who’s coming to your funeral? Maybe you’re thinking, “That’s a morbid thought…” Yet, it’s a real one. As relatives are planning out a funeral, one of the big questions is: How many do we expect to attend?

  The answer – probably not as many as you’d think. It depends a lot on the age and circumstances of the loved one’s death. A young or tragic death will have a much larger funeral. An older, “normal” death usually means a smaller one. Add long age to that and the number drops more.

  Why? Because as we age, our circle of friends shrinks, but it doesn’t have to. Friendships, like a beautiful garden, demand constant cultivation.

  In our young adult years, friendships are relatively easy. We have many commonalities which open up doors for friendships: marriage, babies, children. We continually interact with the same people at school and sporting events. Often our children are in the same school or swim class. During those times of sitting on the sidelines for a game, we talk and make friends. At work, there are individuals that we have a closer affinity to.

  As we become empty nesters, those common events dwindle and friendships often wane. The same is true with work or neighborhood friendships. Switch jobs, retire, move – and those friendships begin to grow cold. Some try to compensate by joining a group of other empty nesters that have a common link; music, a sport or some other mutual interest. Yet, because there are less commonalities, the friendships are usually weaker.

  Most find that those with the same status: age, marital situation, economic level, geographical location, political values, religious affiliation, sports team, etc., are easiest to befriend. When one or more of those things change – for example, a divorce, loss of a spouse or the loss of a job – the friendship changes or even dies.

  A local church is to be unique when it comes to relationships. Our common bond is Christ and He never changes (Hebrews 13:8). Church friendships should be the opposite of our other friendships, in that they’re built on diversity, not sameness. And relationships are stronger in diversity.

  While we’re attracted to those like us, those relationships frequently result in spiritual atrophy. For most, the only ones in our social circle different from us are relatives. Family relationships are a place to learn overlook annoyances that come with those differences. Yet, often a conversation ensues when “they” are absent about, “Why are they so different?” 

  Mark it down! You limit your spiritual growth and moving forward in your sanctification as God desires for you, if you primarily surround yourself with those “just” like you. Spiritual growth comes through friction.

  Do you want to grow healthy friendships? Please look for those who are different from you in age, values, history or economic situation, spiritual walk. Look for what you can give, not what you can get; what you can learn, not what you can teach. Jim Rohn wisely observes that, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If you primarily spend time with those like you, then you only become more like you. But that’s not God’s plan. He wants us to become more like Jesus Christ. 

  Foundational to Christian friendship is the fact that “only Jesus can bring satisfaction to your soul.” A friend can help carry your burdens or share your joy. They can never meet our need for soul satisfaction.

  Here are some friends that I believe that every Christian needs.

  You need a friend who is more spiritually mature than you. We all lack godliness and need growth in certain aspects of our lives. We have spiritual weaknesses or sins that easily throw us. Thus, we need to develop friendships with those who have a deeper walk with the Lord, who have strengths where we have weaknesses. As we surround ourselves with spiritually-minded friends, it encourages us to be more spiritually minded.

  You need a friend who is less spiritually mature than you. That’s what Jesus did. The disciples were a work in progress. The Apostles learned from Jesus and did the same. Peter poured his life into John Mark. Barnabus poured his life into Paul. Paul poured his life into Timothy and Titus. It’s unbiblical and selfish to only look for friends that we can “get” something from. No matter where you are spiritually, there is someone that you can help grow in their spiritual walk. 

  You need a friend who doesn’t know Jesus. Jesus was “the friend of sinners” (Matthew 11:19). Most Christians are hardly acquaintances with those outside the Church and who don’t know the Lord. There’s a fear of being overly influenced. While we need to be wise and cautious. Too often we forget the power of the Spirit and that “truth does not fear scrutiny.”

  We need those who challenge our beliefs and values. If what we believe is true, it will hold up like a rock. If it crumbles, it wasn’t true. As our world becomes more secular, the number of those who share our convictions, or are even open to listening and having a dialogue will continue to dwindle.

  While we do not need social acceptance, how can we win a lost world if we are not first their friends? God loves the world and we’re to love them, too. One qualification for a spiritual leader is that you “must be well thought of by outsiders” (1 Timothy 3:7). Our mission is that we want to be part of seeing outsiders becoming insiders. We represent Jesus to a lost world. We’re here to serve, not be pampered. To love, not be applauded.

  Jesus is our model of being a friend. He reached out to those that others ignored or even considered pariah. Though He was denied and forsaken by those closest to Him, He never wrote them off and ultimately restored them. He shows us that friendship first means being sacrificial. 

  Who’s coming to your funeral? How are your friendships? If you’re like most of us, your friendships and limited circles, are something you need to give attention to. Do you want friends? Be more and more like Jesus! 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Sweeping webs or killing spiders!

  Currently, Jane and I are vacationing at a cabin in Muddy Pond, Tennessee (and no, I’m not making that name up). It’s one of our favorite vacation spots and will be our 4^th time there. It’s nestled in the mountains and we even have our own lake. Our nearest neighbors are bullfrogs and perhaps an errant cow. It’s in the middle of a Mennonite Community, folk who have become friends and whose simpler lifestyle is a wonderful retreat to encourage deep soul rest. It’s a large, one room cabin with a bedroom, living room, kitchen and even a jacuzzi. The only separate room is the bathroom. Our view though of that “bathroom” totally changed after our last visit a couple of years ago. That bathroom is NOT a safe place. 

  We were about to go to bed. I believe I was reading, dozing between somewhat intelligent thought and la-la land, when Jane cried out for me with a very serious tone, “Scott, there’s an enormous spider in the shower!” Since Jane is known for her dread of spiders, I must confess that it wasn’t a “Husband of the Year” moment and I didn’t take it all that seriously. So, I ambled out of bed and peeked. It wasn’t “enormous.” Gargantuan would be a more accurate description! It was the Godzilla of spiders. No doubt it had illegally immigrated from some South American country or escaped from a local zoo. It was terrifying! My greatest fear was that I might miss when I sought to execute it. Then, neither of us would sleep all night for fear that we’d be dragged out of bed and have all of our internal organs sucked out and fed to its offspring.

  Fortunately, I was able to terminate it with one quick, hard shot from a broom. But every night this vacation, like someone who has watched Psycho one too many times, I’ll be peeking behind the shower curtain.

  Wouldn’t it be foolish to clean up spider webs and never kill the spider? Ours is a culture though that cleans up webs, even wrings its hands over them, yet fails to acknowledge even the existence of spiders.

  Nearly every day there is news of another sex crime. A teacher or minister molests a child. Someone is arrested for child pornography. Another victim in the #MeToo movement comes forward and names some person of power or fame as their abuser. Those are all spider webs.

  The Godzilla Spider no one seems to want to acknowledge that is behind the curtain is pornography. Imagine this scenario – America has a problem with obesity. As a result, there’s a needed emphasis on healthier food.

  Can you imagine though how much worse it would be if every time you turned on your computer, a dozen donuts popped out? Or, when you googled something on your smart phone, Skittles appeared? As you channel surf, Big Macs pour out of the remote? Obesity would become a gargantuan problem. Yet, that’s exactly what happens with porn. It’s ubiquitous. It used to only be found in the back of the magazine rack of sleazy stores. Or, it could be found in “Adults Only” stores where creepy men, shuffled in late at night. But that’s not the case today.   

  It was horrible when porn came in on our computers via the Internet, now it’s invaded our smart phones. A device invented for communication is the entry point of unlimited moral debauchery.   

  Here are some spider statistics you may be unaware of. Porn sites receive more regular traffic than Netflix, Amazon, & Twitter combined each month. Those who admit to having extramarital affairs were over 300% more likely to admit consuming porn than those who’ve never committed adultery. 30% of all data transferred across the internet is porn-related. The most common female role in porn is of women in their 20’s portraying a teen. Recorded child sexual exploitation (child porn) is one of the fastest-growing online businesses. Porn is a global, estimated $97 billion industry, with about $12 billion coming from the U.S. In 2016 alone, more than 4,599,000,000 hours of porn were consumed on the world’s largest porn site. 64% of young people, ages 13–24, actively seek out porn weekly. A study of 14 to 19-year-olds found that females who consumed pornographic videos were at a significantly greater likelihood of being victims of sexual harassment or sexual assault. A study of 18-year-old males found that frequent users of pornography were significantly more likely to have sold and bought sex than other boys of the same age. A 2015 meta-analysis of 22 studies from seven countries found that internationally the consumption of porn was associated with increases in verbal and physical aggression, among both males and females.

  What does all this mean? As long as porn is so pervasive, sex crimes will continue to escalate. Or, they will be decriminalized. As porn desensitizes, self-control becomes more difficult. Eroticism becomes an insatiable raging inferno. As culture becomes desensitized, perversion like child porn will be “normalized.” The Guardian recently featured an article with a disturbing claim that there’s “not even a full academic consensus on whether consensual pedophilic relations necessarily cause harm.”

  Personally, I think the #Metoo movement has a short shelf life. Illicit sex is a cash cow. The lust for money will ultimately muzzle the movement.

  What should a Christian do? By God’s grace, live out biblical purity. If you have a problem with porn, confess it as sin and repent. Often, it helps to have an accountability partner. Then, if you wouldn’t hand the keys to the car to a child, why hand a smart phone to a teen? Limit their screen time. Know what they’re watching.

  Be careful what you rationalize as “entertainment.” Soft porn slipped into popular shows erodes our souls. We begin to see image-bearers of God as commodities and less than human.  

  May Christians join with a teenage Joseph, “How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?”? (Genesis 39:10). We must honor and celebrate marriage and biblically healthy sexuality (Proverbs 5:15-19). It’s time to stop sweeping webs and start killing spiders.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.