Sunday, November 24, 2013

Let's stop treating Millennials like a generational menace

“The youth is the hope of our future.”   Jose Rizal

Over the course of my life I’ve observed what I would consider an unbiblical perspective toward young adults in general. Specifically, I’m talking about those who are out of high school and usually in that category known as a twenty-something. My experience has been that in the Church, for the most part, this group is treated akin to an overgrown teenager.
  Our current economy has only encouraged this disdain. Many in this age group find they either had to move back home after college because of a lack of available jobs in their field or because of economic necessity. Those who did not go off to college often have never left home.
  Please understand, my intent is not to justify either immaturity or irresponsibility. Accompanying the transition into adulthood, there are normal adult responsibilities, i.e., holding down a full time job, handling one’s personal finances, domestic responsibilities (cooking, cleaning, washing one’s own clothes, etc.), or pursuing a post-high school education. There needs to be a transition into a healthy adulthood after high school.
  Yet, personally, I believe that there are some assumptions of what are “adult” responsibilities which I don’t find are biblically justified. My experience has been that these are more common in the Church than the secular world. For example, there is frequently an unspoken assumption that you’re not really an adult until you’re married. Another one that I find illogical is that you are not really an adult until you live on your own. While I believe in adult independence, I’m not sure how it reputedly demonstrates adult independence if one has to live with a room mate to be considered to be out on “one’s own” or can barely afford groceries. To be sure, if a twenty-something is living with their parents there should be some home responsibilities, much as they’d have if they were living independently. A cooperative living situation should not be a blank check for irresponsibility.
  For some reason, too, this generation of twenty-somethings, seem to be a little more immature than previous ones. Personally, I think some of that is the result of their parents’ rampant divorce rate, cohabitation, absentee parenting, unrestrained materialism and a valueless culture. Because of this immaturity, I’ve met older adults who want to wash their hands of them.
  Some time back I had an extended conversation with someone in their fifties that was exasperated with twenty-somethings and their immaturity. He was washing his hands of them and had determined he’d no longer be involved in a ministry to them. After listening to his venting, I suggested that if all of us as older, hopefully more mature Christians washed our hands of investing in this generation and were unwilling to seek to help them or mentor them…who will?
  My own experience when I was their age was that I was frequently treated with disdain in the Church, yet treated as an equal outside of the Church. At work, I was expected to perform as an adult. But at church, because of my age, my input was given very little credibility or value. Often I was treated poorly, sometimes made the butt of jokes…just because of my age. Not a situation, I must confess, I always I responded to in a Christlike manner, unfortunately. The Bible college I attended was very legalistic and epitomized this problem. It was assumed that college students weren’t responsible enough to even know when to go to bed or get up, just because of their youth. It’s noteworthy when someone turns eighteen, even our secular government recognizes that they’re old enough to vote or die in a war. If they commit a crime, the courts treat them as an adult who is fully responsible for their choices. Where they live, their grasp of life skills, their marital status or even their mental/emotional maturity are not factors that are considered for those rights or responsibilities.
  The Apostle Paul wrote to his young protégé in the faith, Timothy, “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). At Grace, we’re committed to respecting adults of all ages, no matter what their living situation or marital status. We’re committed to planning generationally. Some day, in the not too distant future, twenty-somethings will be the leaders of our church and many of them are already.
  At this phase of their lives, most of them don’t have financial resources to make huge investments in our Building Changed Lives Together Campaign. We determined though, even if they’re living with their parents, that they’d receive the same materials as every other adult in our church. Why? We want to make a strong, philosophical statement! This new tool is a generational one. And one day all of its responsibilities as well as the direction of our church will fall on their shoulders. We want their input both in the design of this building and financial commitment for our new building. As we’ve stated from day one of this Campaign, it’s going to take both wide and deep financial commitments. It’s is just as important for those still saddled with college debt and commencing their adult lives to be part of this, as it is for those of us on the other side of those financial obligations. It’s about being a church family that’s multi-generational. It’s about ownership and stewardship.
  So to all of our wonderful twenty-something adults who call Grace their church home, please partner with us. Do what you can financially and please share your input and observations so that we construct a new tool you will use to serve the Lord when the baton of leadership is passed off to you.

Sunday, November 17, 2013

The cost of taking up your cross...


“Riches are not an end of life, but an instrument of life.”
               Henry Ward Beecher

  I’ve been thinking about money a lot lately. Okay, I think about money a lot – period, but probably a little more lately. Now don’t rat me out…after all, I’m a Pastor and am not supposed to think about such worldly matters…and if you believe that….
  Some of my friends will ask about our proposed building plans. I’m quick to quip, “Got a million dollars lying around some where?”  
  As I was thinking back over my life, I’ve never been someone who wanted or needed to have lots of money. Yet, one of the biggest struggles in my life with money though was walking away from making money. Maybe it plugs into some male ego thing of needing to win or conqueror.
  There have been two major decision hurdles that I’ve had to cross that were very, very difficult for me. They were truly repentance moments where I turned from heading one direction and start heading in the opposite direction. They were Matthew 16:24 moments for me. There Jesus told His disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” Taking up your cross is a one way trip. It’s the death to self, your own agenda, drives, and wishes.
  That first “take up your cross” moment was when I was fifteen and I gave up drinking. Even at that age, I’d already become a very heavy drinker and had a reputation as my high school’s drunk. I’ll never forget pouring out a half gallon of Bacardi as parts of me screamed that I needed and that I couldn’t give up…but I did. It was a life changing “take up your cross” moment.
  The other “take up your cross” moment was a few years after I’d graduated from Bible College with a degree in Pastoral studies. I’d served at a church in Central Illinois as their assistant pastor. Then, Jane and I had returned with our little family to the Detroit area with plans of planting a new church in Ann Arbor. I’d worked my way through college working for a commercial roofing company. After graduating, I’d returned to that field but this time selling roofing. God had blessed and I’d been very successful.
  When a company offered me an opportunity to launch an office for them in the Detroit area, I jumped at it. Again, God blessed and I was able to break all records for sales for a new office, selling something like $1.25 million that year and winning “Salesman of the Year.” Unfortunately, in my youthful naïveté, I failed to get a contract. The owner of the company reneged on his promise for my commission and I was out my commission. But the Lord used it because I really, really enjoyed selling and making money. That’s when I faced another “take up your cross” moment. I had to choose whether I wanted to stay in the ministry or pursue a career in sales. At that point, I could have gone anywhere in the country with another roofing company. The company I’d worked for had a reputation for their record year which I was a major part of. It would have been easy to have found another position. A couple of roofing companies contacted me. One, even after I’d been pastoring our church for a few years, to see if I’d consider going back into roofing. 
  Please understand – there is nothing wrong with money. Money is merely a means of exchange. It’s our attitude toward money that’s either good or bad; godly or ungodly. There are several common attitudes toward money.
  Some despise money and the making of money. Yet, they have to survive and so they’re usually dependent on others to supply the hated “exchange” they need to survive. They also violate God’s will and command that we’re to use the gifts that He’s entrusted to us as a stewardship. We’re to be creative (Genesis 1:28). That’s why working and creating is so fulfilling. It’s how God designed us. Work isn’t part of the curse. Those who won’t work and aren’t creative are often some of the most miserable individuals on earth. They’re not fulfilling their God-ordained design and purpose.
  Some love to spend money. They’re consumed by consumerism and materialism. They live for bigger, better, brighter believing it will somehow bring meaning, fulfillment and satisfaction to their lives. It never will. Instead it succumbs to idolatry and they’ve fulfilled the tragedy of Romans 1:25, “they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator.”
  Some love to save money. Obviously, there’s nothing wrong with saving money. Saving money only becomes an issue when we hoard it and neglect Kingdom opportunities. We have a responsibility to use our money for our Lord (it’s all His after all). We are also to use our money to minister to the poor, particularly those who are fellow believers (1 John 3:17).
  Some love to make money. Some are just gifted at working, being creative or making the right investments. They know how to take a little bit of capital and make it grow, often exponentially. The Bible commends them for their wise money usage (Matthew 25:14-23). There’s nothing wrong with being wealthy. Some of the godliest individuals in the Bible were also some of the richest – Abraham, Job, Lydia – to name a few.
  Some love to give money. God loves a cheerful giver (2 Corinthians 9:7). Our generosity has profound potential to bring God glory. Miserliness, on the other hand, sours the effects of the gospel in our lives and others. Each of us, in assessing our own level of generosity or stinginess though needs to ask some vital questions:
·        Does my generosity lead others to give thanks to God for His glory?
·        Does my lifestyle generosity obedience to the gospel and is it for to the glory of God?
·        Do I really believe God will reward me for my generosity?
  We must all heed the warning found in Matthew 6:19-21, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
  We are so blessed that we worship a God who gives freely and lavishly. So do we resemble our Heavenly Father? Is this kind of giving reflected in our checkbooks? Does our lifestyle keep the free flow of grace going to the glory of God? The Father gave His Son for us. Will we clench His grace tightly or let it flow freely through us toward His work? Let me encourage you to let the “treasure” God has entrusted with you to slip through your fingers into ministry and let God get all the glory.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

High pressure giving tactics are just wrong!!



“It's so easy to manipulate an audience, but it's nearly always clear that you are being manipulated.”  John Boorman

  Do you hate feeling pressured? Manipulated? I know I do. Usually, I find that if I feel I’m being manipulated, either I react negatively. Or, if I don’t discover it until after the fact, then I feel used and taken advantage…and even resentful. Most of us feel that way.
  Some years ago when Jane and I were living in Detroit, we were in the market for a new car. If you’re like me, car shopping rates right up there with visits to the dentist, tax audits and jury duty. After negotiating with a salesman, his sales manager thought that he’d give us a shove to close the deal. So across the showroom, he yells at me, “Mr. Carson, what will it take for us to close this deal and sell you a car?” And I very quietly responded, “I don’t know. I do know though that I won’t have that conversation with you across the middle of this showroom.” Then, Jane and I thanked our salesman, hurriedly left and never went back. I didn’t know where I was going to buy a car BUT I did know where I wasn’t going to buy a car. None of us like to feel we’re being pressured or manipulated.
  At Grace Church, we’re committed to the biblical reality that every square inch of our life belongs to God. There’s nothing that any of us possess or own that was not given to us by God. That means that how we handle our possessions generally and our money specifically – how we spend it, where we give it and how much we give is supremely spiritual. It’s a matter of obedience and faithfulness between every believer and the Lord Jesus.
  Please write this on your heart – when you give at Grace Church – you are not giving to Grace Church. Our church just happens to be the place in time and history that God has brought you to where you are worshipping the Lord with your gifts. All giving is to God. It’s why we call it an “offering.” It’s being offered to God and our giving should reflect our love, gratitude and obedience to Jesus.
  If someone gives because they’ve been manipulated, besides being spiritually unethical, God will not bless it. This is a spiritual work and your commitment and giving to our campaign, Building Changed Lives Together, must first be a work of the heart. Each one of us needs to give because we love Jesus and believe that our gift is His will and honors Him.
  That’s why we’re so committed to the commitments for our Building Changed Lives Together campaign being confidential. Just two individuals in our church will know what you’ve committed: Dave Thompson and Jackie Strelow. And this is important; they’ll only know what you’ve committed, so that we can plan for the future based on the total of everyone’s commitments. If you’re situation should change between your commitment and when you’re able to give it, we’d appreciate it if you would please let one of them know. But they will never know how much you give. Only our Financial Secretary knows that information so that we can give you a receipt for your gift, so that you can receive tax credit for your giving with the IRS.
  We believe that this is very, very important. If anyone feels pressure, we do not want it to be from our church. If the Holy Spirit is tugging on your heart and urging you to give, that’s fine. It’s between you and the Lord. We’re working to make sure that you know what’s at stake, that we believe that this is God’s will and what we believe that God is calling us to do. BUT there is no pressure. No one is going to call you up or come to your house, and put the squeeze on you in any way for a commitment.
  We also don’t want to know who gives what because that might tempt us with pride. Pride is so pervasive and tempting. We want to make sure that your reward for your commitment lasts forever and is out of this world (Matthew 6:1-4) because only God really knows.
  There are many ways that churches raise money. And committed Christians differ on some of this and use various methods. We believe that whatever God has given to you is yours to use and dispense as you see fit, hopefully in a way that honors the Lord. For example, Inspiration Ministries has an annual auction of items donated to their ministry, (cars, boats, collectibles, etc). That’s a wonderful and creative way to raise capital. Some people donate collectibles, stocks or even property to a church that the church can then sell to raise money. Many Christians leave money or property in their estate to the church. Some establish trust funds to benefit a certain ministry, usually in a special way.
  Some churches have big fund raisers. They’ll have a Vegas night or some other money making event that will financially benefit both the church and the participants. Some form of gambling is used. But the Christian life is a life of faith. It’s anything but a gamble. We rest in the promises of God.
  Others have big dinners, car washes or some other benefit, and either charge or ask for donations. At Grace, we truly do not want to judge what others do. We’re just very hesitant to do anything that might somehow communicate that the Gospel is for sale. We believe our financial responsibilities are the responsibilities of the people of faith. If those who do not know the Lord want to give to our church, we’re not going to prohibit them. BUT we don’t want to solicit it. Their greatest need and our greatest desire for them is for them to receive God’s free gift of salvation. Salvation can never be purchased. It’s all of grace and we’d rather never have a building, than have someone miss the wonderful gift of salvation because they confused it with some donation to our ministry.
  And just as none of us would go to our neighbors asking them to contribute toward our child’s college fund, we believe that our new building, as well as our normal bills are our responsibility.
  2 Corinthians 9 records a “fund raising” plan in the early church. At Grace, we are committed to seeking to please God even as we seek to encourage giving. We believe that growth in giving and generosity is spiritual work and helps us mature in our faith. We also want to live out the words found of 2 Corinthians 9:7 “Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” We truly want you to give to our Building Changed Lives Together joyfully, knowing that you’re not giving it to Grace Church. You’re giving it to King Jesus who died on the cross for our sins! It’s truly a gift of love and gratitude!

Monday, November 4, 2013

If this is the Communication Age...whatever happened to the communication?



“Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.”  Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Recently, Jane and I bought a new dish. Okay, it’s not really ours. And while it’s something you use, you can’t eat off of it…though you can eat in front of it, or at least you can eat in front of what it serves up to you.
  For some time, we’d had the most basic cable plan. But as Time Warner began to lose more and more stations, and kept raising our monthly bill higher and higher, we finally decided to switch. (And yes, I know that I’m a pastor and should only be reading my Bible and praying 24/7 BUT I really do like NCIS. Does it get me off the hook if I also watch the Packers periodically? :) ).
  But all of a sudden, for less money, we went from 20 channels to 120. We now have at least two jewelry stations, a horse racing channel and even the Weather Channel (I’ll be glued to that one come January). To make certain that the one eyed monster increases my spirituality, there are several religious channels as well…even a Prayer Channel. I figured it out. I can watch every channel in a 24 hour period, but only for 12 minutes a channel.
  Do you remember in the movie, You’ve Got Mail, how excited Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan would get when they received an email? Well, the excitement is long over. Do you find yourself ignoring more emails these days? When you do open one, do you find you skim, only to discover later that you missed some vital information? How many times though do you check your email a day? Compare that to how many times we receive “snail mail.” Can you imagine someone going out to their mailbox every hour to see if some new piece of mail might have arrived? Yet, many of us check our email several times an hour.
  Does it bother you when you see people that are “over connected”? They’re ranks are growing. They’re everywhere. I notice it most when I go out to eat. I’ll be sitting at my table and I’ll look over and see what is obviously a couple. One or both of them is texting away on their phones, having a conversation with someone possibly hundreds of miles away, yet ignoring the person sitting right across from them at the table. Sometimes they are even so gauche as to actually talk on their phone to someone miles away while ignoring the person that they’re sharing a meal with.
  When the Blackberry came out, they were referred to as the “Crackberry,” because owners were addicted to their little screens. But the infection has spread so that now someone who doesn’t have a smartphone is considered a caveman. There’s even smartphone envy where you find yourself coveting the more up to date one with the latest features.
  The truth is that Communication Age is aging us…at the very least, it’s stressing us out. And I haven’t even mentioned Facebook, Twitter, Instant Messaging or the thousands of radio stations we have available. Is it any wonder that there is an epidemic of IOF (Information Overload Fatigue)?
  My two favorite words are “Honey” and “Dad.” When I’m referred to by either of those two names, I try to listen up. Yet, I find that often I can be so overwhelmed with all of the other communication channels that I miss out on my two favorite “channels.” I’ve had to take some proactive steps. I try to put my phone or laptop away. Turn off the TV (muting it doesn’t work for me…too many eye candy distractions). But I know that I’m suffering from IOF when Jane or one of my kids says, “But I told you about…” and I’d totally missed it.
  All of us deal with IOF. We’re bombarded with communication from countless sources. That poses a big challenge for us here at church, particularly right now.
  We’ve come to one of the most important moments in the history of our church. There’s a lot of information that we’re seeking to communicate clearly and in a very timely manner. So we need you, as part of the church family, to listen very carefully and to process this information.
  Because we know the cultural struggle that we have with IOF, we’ll be repeating, working through, defining and explaining much of the information again and again. We want to make certain that everyone hears and understands what we’re seeking to do and where we’re seeking to go.
  Please understand, this is NOT about us. We truly believe that if we’re going to be and do what God has called us to do; we must take these next spiritual steps forward. We are at a historical crossroads in our ministry. We have a both a tremendous opportunity and an awesome responsibility.
  So what can you do? Listen. It’s that simple. Yet, none of us want you to just listen just to us. The most important voice that you must listen to is the still, small voice of the Spirit of God in your own heart (Psalm 46:10; 1 Kings 19:11-13). I’m confident that if each of us will do that, and if we’ll come humbly and obediently before the Lord, we’ll move forward with this next step for our church.
  I know that God wants us to be more effective in making disciples of Jesus Christ. We’ve been limping for a long time. We’ve been attempting to use a 1955 tool of a building that greatly handicaps us.
  All around us are lost individuals looking for answers, reason, hope, love, forgiveness. Most don’t even know what they’re looking for. They just know that what they have is leaving them empty.
  We have the living water that satisfies thirsty souls (John 4:13-14). We have a Great Commission given to us by King Jesus to share that living water with everyone, whenever and wherever we can. That’s what this is all about, that’s what Building Changed Lives Together is about. It’s about reaching our community, our loved ones, our friends and neighbors for Christ. It’s about pleasing King Jesus and hearing Him say, “Well, done, good and faithful servants.”