Making the Most of Mistakes!

 “Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life.”  Sophia Loren 

  Have you ever dialed a wrong number? I’m not talking about a butt call, but actually getting the numbers confused and dialing a wrong number. How about making a wrong turn? Sent an email to the wrong person or did a reply all when you should have replied to one person? 

  2022 is still in the delivery room. You probably already know this…you’re going to make mistakes this year, lots of them.

  There’s a tendency for most people to confuse mistakes with sins. They’re not the same. The term “mistake” implies an error in judgment—something done unintentionally. A legitimate mistake might be…turning onto a one-way street, going the wrong way, or pouring salt into your coffee, thinking it was sugar, calling someone the wrong name or completely forgetting their name. It’s picking up Pepsi when you’re supposed to buy Coke. These could all be legitimate mistakes.

  A sin is more than a mistake. It’s a deliberate choice to do something you know is wrong. The word “transgression” is stronger. It implies deliberately stepping over a boundary. 

  In 2022, you’re going to make mistakes. Mistakes though are just part of an imperfect world. They can even be fun or open doors to new adventures.

  At the beginning of December 2021 one Pontiac, Michigan, high school basketball team sent out a group text to a wrong number. The person that they inadvertently messaged was Tampa Bay Buccaneers cornerback, Sean Murphy-Bunting. Their mistake would lead to a FaceTime call with some of the biggest stars in the Bucs' locker room that day.

  The call started because they didn't believe who Murphy-Bunting was. He then got tight end, Rob Gronkowski, to join in, before handing the phone off to cornerback, Richard Sherman, and running back, Leonard Fournette. Fournette stayed on FaceTime for a good 10 minutes while Tom Brady finished up a meeting. The boys are absolutely losing it during this. After some time passes he pops up on the screen and says “What’s up fellas?!?!” And those boys lose their minds!

  “That was sweet,” Brady said of the impromptu FaceTime. “I didn't know who it was. [Leonard] said, ‘Here's my boy’ or whatever he said. It was nice. It would have been nice for me when I had been in high school too.”

  And when Tom Brady found out the kids were from Michigan? “Even better,” he said. “That was fun. That was really fun. It was really good to see all those young kids hyped up.”

  That’s a mistake that they’ll tell their children and grandchildren about. To me, it’s what makes Tom Brady a G.O.A.T. It’s not just his unbelievable skills on the football field, it’s how he and those other professional football players treated some teenagers who had simply dialed the wrong number.

  You’re going to make mistakes. I’m going to make mistakes. Everyone you know is going to make mistakes.

  If you can, enjoy your mistakes. If you make a wrong turn or miss your exit, the world will not end. If you dial a wrong number, it’s just human error. If you spill something or break something or lose something…it’s just a mistake. 

  One of the greatest gifts that a parent can give a child is the freedom to make mistakes. Kids accidentally spill things, break things, and lose things (Big kids do too!). It’s part of growing up. It’s not the time to read them the riot act. It was just part of being human…just like their parents.

  Most of us need to learn to take life far less seriously. I’ll never forget when Jane and I were first married and I wanted to repay a friend for repairing my car with a southern meal. So I cooked: fried chicken, biscuits, and buttermilk gravy to repay him. But I made a big mistake with the biscuits. Rather than a teaspoon of baking powder, I didn’t understand the abbreviation and put in a tablespoon of baking powder. They were horrible! But my friend was so gracious and only laughed at my blunder. 

  Turn mistakes into adventures and opportunities. Our children always knew that life for our family was about to get interesting if we were driving somewhere and either Jane or I looked at each other and said, “Pudding!”

  It’s a code word from the George Bernard Shaw play, Pygmalion (it later inspired the film version, My Fair Lady). For the two actors who used the code word, it meant that an adventure had started. 

  Life is often an adventure and a fun one. There were many unique places we went or people that we met just because we’d made a wrong turn. Rather than becoming angry or anxious, look for the fun opportunity.

  Alaska is one of the fifty states because Russia thought they needed money more than territory and sold it to the U.S. for a mere 2 cents an acre. Though ridiculed “Seward’s Folly” mocking then U.S. Secretary of State William H. Seward’s purchase of the territory, in just 50 years the USA was able to earn from Alaska more than 100 times what they had invested in its purchase. 

  Let your mistakes cultivate that needed gift of humility in your life. J.K. Rowling, who was a client of the Christopher Little Literary Agency, was rejected 12 times in row for her first novel. Finally, when the eight-year-old daughter of an editor at Bloomsbury expressed her desire to read the rest of the book, Bloomsbury decided to publish Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. However, the editor believed that this novel would be a major flop, and even went to the extent of advising Rowling to look for a backup day-time job. And the rest is history. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, which was released in 1997, and the following four novels in the series, became the fastest-selling books ever, with a total of 450 million copies sold worldwide. It’s the bestselling book series in literary history. 

  Life is not a planned perfect selfie. It’s more like a scene from America’s Funniest Bloopers. You can choose to become embarrassed or irritated, or you can laugh at the reminder that you’re human. Being human means we humbly admit that we blow it and don’t have all of the answers.

  In 2022 learn to laugh at yourself. It will keep your soul healthy (Proverbs 17:22) and give you some needed perspective that this isn’t a perfect world and neither are we. And taking life a lot less seriously sure makes the day-to-day journey a lot more enjoyable! 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

  

 

 

 

Killing Flies with Cannons

 

“Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.” Oscar Wilde

 

  It gives a whole new meaning to the term “bad haircut.” A court in India ordered a hair salon to pay a model $271,000 to compensate her for a bad haircut. This model had been employed by hair care product firms because of her long hair, but the offending salon chopped her hair short against her instructions, causing her a huge monetary loss. India’s National Consumer Disputes Redressal Commission (NCDRC) ruled that she lost “her expected assignments and suffered a huge loss which completely changed her lifestyle and shattered her dream to be a top model. She underwent severe mental breakdown and trauma due to negligence...in cutting her hair and could not concentrate on her job and finally she lost her job.” 

  This model had gone to the hotel in 2018 to get a haircut and gave specific instructions to the staff about the look she wanted. But the hairstylist cut a major part of her hair, leaving only 4-inches from the top touching her shoulder. When she complained to the salon, she was offered a free hair treatment to make up for the mistake. The woman told the court that the treatment was “dubious and it resulted in damage of her hair. She also suffered the loss of income due to a mental breakdown after the shoddy haircut and, thereafter, the torturous hair treatment. She left her job also… She has gone through the pain and trauma for the last two years after this incident. She lost her self-esteem due to little hair.”

  Probably there was financial loss and some compensation may have been justified but her hair will grow back. What’s the old saying, “the difference between a good and a bad haircut is about two weeks.” $271,000 compensation? That’s way over the top for one bad haircut!

  Overreacting is the norm of today’s world. You’ve probably been in a restaurant where someone had a meltdown because their order was incorrect. Many of these incidents have been captured on YouTube. This world is filled with petty individuals and dramaholics.

  Sometimes these individuals find their way into our churches. Recently, I learned of an administrative assistant at an area church who each week has church attendees point out all of the mistakes she made in the church bulletin. How sad! These missionaries of misery typically overreact about things that don’t really matter, the minute details, the little goofs that have no bearing on anything of significant importance.

  Yet let’s admit it, most of us have our “shooting flies with a cannon” moments. Often, we’re toughest on ourselves. Somehow we’ve lost a grip on the reality that mistakes happen. As famed English poet, Alexander Pope, wisely observed, “to err is human.”

  Mistakes are a part of life. Who hasn’t been driving down the road and realized that they’d left their blinker on for countless miles or forgot to turn off their high beams until an oncoming driver flashed their lights at them. I find that I’m a professional at misplacing things. Often I find what I lost last when I’m looking for the current item that I’ve lost.

  Accidents happen…it’s why they’re called “accidents.” Wise parents help their children handle mistakes by not overreacting. There’s a huge difference between an accident and purposeful rebellion. For example, children spill things (so do adults). That’s completely different from a child who dumps things in anger or throws them. A response to an accident should be a different response than one for rebellion or disobedience.

  My friend, Kathy Lincoln, would wisely say: “You have to know the difference between a lump in your oatmeal, a lump in your throat, or a lump in your breast.” Most gaffes we encounter aren’t worth the angst we give them. Often they’re not permanent and are easily solvable.

  One of my favorite things to say to a clerk or food server who is horrified that they have made a mistake is: “If that’s the worst thing that happens to me today, I’ve had a good day.” Please understand I can slip into being an ogre of overreacting as well as anyone. Something though about being in innumerable ICU units and emergency rooms over the years has given me a needed sense of perspective. It’s a broken, sin-contaminated world. Mistakes are ingrained into it. How should we handle mistakes?

  See mistakes as a blessing and an opportunity to grow. David McCullough’s, The Wright Brothers, records the many failures Orville and Wilbur had before they finally succeeded in inventing the airplane. Mistakes can lead us to discover diverse ways of successfully completing a task. Without mistakes, we’d miss learning many things that make our lives so much more fulfilling.

  Mistakes can be relationship builders. Mistakes provide us with an opportunity to build relationships with those that we otherwise wouldn’t have a relationship. Seeking out help or advice after blundering is an opportunity to make a new friend. None of us are experts at everything. God designed us to need and depend on others.

  Mistakes are an opportunity to show grace. Why did Peter love Jesus so much? Because Jesus was so forgiving and patient with Peter’s continual bungling. Compassion and patience build relationships.

  Think of some of the individuals you feel closest to. Often they’re the ones who’ve shown you the most grace. Graciousness deepens our relationships and trust. One study by Jonathan Haidt of New York University showed that the more employees look up to their leaders and are moved by their kindness, the more loyal they become to him or her.

  When you make a mistake, admit it. Confucius said, “If you make a mistake and do not correct it, this is called a mistake.” James 5:16 has the best way to handle it, “Confess your faults to one another.” Don’t blame others, instead take personal responsibility. Stick to the facts and don’t make excuses. It’s not a time for humor or making light of the situation. Apologize that you blew it. If there’s damage or restitution needed, cover it. If possible, outline your new direction or decision, provide the process and timeframe for correcting future mistakes.

  We all blunder. We need to show grace when others make them and take responsibility when we make them. Thankfully, we have a forgiving Father for our countless sins. We’re to forgive others as He has forgiven us (Eph. 4:31-32). Being a forgiver is what it means to be a Christ-follower.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.