Faithful Men of God

 “Men of God are those who walk in the fear of the Lord.”  Matt Chandler

   I love to watch law enforcement TV shows. I particularly enjoy the FBI series. Yet, I find that I frequently have to mentally tune out producer Dick Wolf’s flagrant anti-Christian bias. It seems that he never wastes an opportunity to belittle the beliefs and values of Christians. For example, when the FBI: Most Wanted team entered a pedophile’s house in a recent episode, it was full of religious items, implying that it was his strict religious upbringing that turned him into a monster. What’s the point of portraying a pedophile as a God-fearing Christian with Bible verses except to sell an overused stereotype about evil hypocritical Christians? 

  Bashing Christians, particularly men, is the latest cultural fad. Dr. Anthea Butler, the chair of the University of Pennsylvania Department of Religious Studies says “a white evangelical man supports racism, sexism and violence.” This caricature is one reason that I believe we should abandon the term “evangelical” for something like “Christ-follower.”

  Some Christians react to such slurs with anger, returning tit for tat. That only plays into the hands of the Enemy. And none of this is new. The early church experienced it, too. It’s instead an opportunity for us to turn the other cheek (Matt. 5:39) and live out what Jesus has called us to, a Christian Counterculture. We don’t live to be popular, but to please an audience of One. Our confused world desperately needs godly men, whether single or married. What does it mean to be a godly man?

  You will never be a godly man unless you know Jesus personally. There are many men of character, but to be all that you can be, you can’t do it on your own. In a sense, as a pastor, I’m paid to be good…but without Jesus, I’m a mess. I’m not as kind, patient, forgiving or anything else that matters on my own. I need a power that I will never find in myself. It’s why we need a cross and a Savior. Every man who wants to make a difference and have his life count has the same need.

  Because of that relationship with Jesus, he is committed to being a person of character and conviction. It means like Daniel, you pray even though it may mean a lions’ den. You don’t bow to the rulers of this world like a Shadrach, Meshach or Abednego even if it means a fiery furnace. It may mean refusing to wear a symbol of a movement that violates your convictions even if it means being labeled “hateful” or a “bigot,” as five Tampa Bay Rays players did. Yet, in the midst of the verbal assaults, you still choose to be gracious and Christlike.

  He’s considerate of the disenfranchised. In a dog-eat-dog world driven by self-promotion, he proactively is kind, thoughtful, and helpful to those who can’t benefit him like children, the elderly, those with special needs, the poor…or just those who are different. He notices, serves, and cares for those often ignored, treated with condescension, or mistreated and abused.

  He has a strong work ethic. He takes personal responsibility. He doesn’t live off of the government or his parents. He knows that any talent, abilities, and intelligence that he has is a gift to be used for the glory of God and a stewardship entrusted to him by God. He’s not a workaholic yet has a biblical worldview of work, seeking to turn the curse back into a blessing.  

  He realizes that when we are faithful in our work, God supplies our needs. Scripture teaches that those willing to work God’s way will be blessed. God’s plan is not necessarily for us to amass great fortunes, but desires to meet our needs and wants us to share His blessings with those who are in need. A godly man sees his work as worship and trusts God to honor his faithfulness. Because of that, there is great satisfaction with diligent work and a job well done.

  He is a spiritual leader. He’s a man of the Word and prayer. He sets an example for his wife and children by keeping the main thing the main thing. While he may enjoy sports or hobbies, they’re secondary to his relationship with God and the needs of his family. He lives a balanced life.

  He is willing to be vulnerable. If he’s married, he’s a one-woman man, even with his eyes and thoughts. He loves his wife and she’s secure in his love and knows that he is faithful to her. He takes his vows seriously.

  If he’s a Dad, his children know that he loves them, yet he will hold them accountable and direct their paths. He’s more concerned about them succeeding in God’s eternal kingdom than being successful in this temporal world and making him look good. Because he’s a man of the Word, he is a source of wisdom and counsel not subjective opinions or pontificating. What can we do to cultivate more godly men?

  We must encourage them. Godly men are not highly valued today. Too often, they’re disdained and considered out of touch. Even though they struggle, even though they have not arrived, they need lots of encouragement. If we don’t give it to them, they’re not going to find it out in a lost world. It must come from their families and the family of God.

  We must let them know that they are respected. God wired men to need respect. Ask any man if they had to choose which would they choose – love or respect. The vast majority will choose respect, even over love. Yet, many men frequently don’t receive respect at their jobs or in our world. Instead, because they live by God’s plan they may be disdained or demeaned. There needs to be a place where they know they’re respected. That place, in God’s wise plan, should be the home and the local church.  

  Native Americans had a ritual for training young braves. On the night of a boy's 13th birthday, he was placed in a dense forest to spend the entire night alone. Until then he'd never been away from the security of his family and tribe. But on this night he was blindfolded and taken miles away. When he took off the blindfold he was in the middle of a deep forest. He was terrified! Every time a twig snapped, he visualized a wild animal ready to pounce. Every time an animal howled, he imagined a wolf leaping out of the darkness. Every time the wind blew, he wondered if a storm was coming. After what seemed like an eternity, the first rays of sunlight entered the interior of the forest. Looking around, the boy saw flowers, trees, and the outline of the path. Then, to his utter amazement, he saw the figure of a man standing a few feet away, armed with a bow and arrow. It was the boy's father who had been there all night long! 

  Men, you’re not alone. Your heavenly Father is standing right next to you, He’s the Dad you may have never had. As you trust and honor Him, He will bless you. When you fail, which you will, your Heavenly Father will pick you up, forgive you and give you the grace to carry on.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

 

  

You don’t have to be a Father to be a Dad in someone’s life

“Every dad, if he takes time out of his busy life to reflect upon his fatherhood, can learn ways to become an even better dad.” 

Jack Baker

19.7 million children, more than 1 in 4, live without a father in the home. Consequently, there is a missing father factor in nearly every social ill facing America today. Childhood isn’t easy. Having two loving, committed parents is one of the best gifts a child can receive.

  While my relationship with my father was very strained, my Heavenly Father richly blessed me with many other men who stepped into that role and more than filled what was missing. When it comes to a need for a Dad, God wonderfully fulfilled the promise of Philippians 4:19 for me, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” Let me mention just a few.

  Bob Collins was one of my Sunday School teachers when I was a boy. We were typical boys – mischievous and unruly (we were pretty horrible). There may have been a dozen of us in his class. I’m not sure, but I don’t think that Bob ever had children of his own. Yet, he not only taught our class but he’d schedule activities for us outside of class. I’d never been bowling, yet Bob would take the whole lot of us and taught us how to bowl. He had a heart of gold and left his fingerprints on my life.

  Jim Penley was a leader at our church in a type of Christian Boy Scouts, “Boys Stockade.” Jim had a passion for the Lord and ministry. He also had a heart for influencing young lives. On Sundays, Jim would go to a housing project near our church and lead a Bible study for boys from that project. He helped me cut my teeth in ministry. Jim enlisted three or four of us to assist him. We’d go door to door at those apartments and invite young men from the project to come to Jim’s class and then help with the class.

  As maybe a nine-year-old, it was an early introduction to ministry, to reaching cross-culturally and seeing poverty firsthand. It left a lifelong impression on me. It was not a big surprise that Jim later packed up his wife and family to attend Bible college to prepare to be a pastor.

  Kent Richards was my youth pastor when I was a teen. I could fill chapters sharing about Kent Richards. He was from Decatur, Illinois, so I’m sure Atlanta was a culture shock for him. He was the first person that I ever met that drank Pepsi (Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola). Kent wasn’t flashy or “cool.” He was just solid and godly. He always had time for me.

  After the loss of my Mom and the ongoing issues of my Dad, I was a young man with a lot of pain, yet Kent would listen for hours. He helped keep me anchored. To say that I was a rascal is an understatement. Yet, Kent never cut me off. Later when he got married, he and his bride, Rita, were always willing to give me a ride to church and youth activities. I’m sure that they were on a limited salary, yet they’d often take me to dinner with them. I was a broken, hurting teen and Kent was God’s instrument to help put the pieces back together in my life.

  Bob Crain was a rock. Bob had been in the Navy during World War II and had at least one ship shot out from under him. His wife, Harriett, was my Mom’s best friend. A very successful businessman, yet they opened their home to college-age missionary kids whose parents were on the field.

   Back then it was too expensive for them to go “home” to a foreign field to be with their parents for the summer. So, Bob and Harriett helped them find summer jobs and gave them free room and board.

  Though Bob was kind, he was tough as nails. He was always there for you and would take a personal interest in your life, but if you screwed up, he’d let you know. He didn’t just smooth things over. He held you accountable. And you’ve never been reprimanded, until you’ve been chewed out by Bob Crain…and it was wonderful. Because you knew that he loved you and if you love someone, you’re willing to even say the tough stuff.

  Dr. David Capetz. I met him shortly after I arrived at Maranatha Academy. I was fifteen. I’d wanted to go away to school. I thought it was my best hope of freeing myself from a substance abuse background. But it was the first time that I’d been away from home. I’d never even attended camp but here I was nearly 1,000 miles away from everything that I’d ever known, in a dorm room with five other guys, all of them in college – and I hated it! I was ready to hop one of the trains that rumbled through the back of the campus. Somehow Dr. Capetz and I met, and by then, I was a very desperate kid.

  It was the first time that I remember sharing my story with anyone. I told him how much it hurt to lose my Mom, how I hated my Dad, and how bitter I was. He took me to Ephesians 4:31-32. It’s been an anchor passage for me ever since: “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” He pointed out that since God had forgiven me for so much, it was wrong for me to not forgive my Dad…no matter what had happened, and for the first time in my life, I was free! Sure I had setbacks, but I’d tasted heart freedom and I could never go back.

  Frequently, I’d drop by his office and he’d take the time to listen, counsel me, take me to God’s Word, and pray with me.

  One more, though there are many others, Leigh Crockett. We were both from the Atlanta area so we had a lot in common. He was such a part of our lives that our youngest son, Aaron’s middle name is “Leigh” and named after him.

  Leigh headed up the Speech Department at Maranatha. He was one of the most loved professors and we became lifelong friends. In fact, he had a tremendous influence on both Jane and me (Jane was a Speech Minor, too).  He had a personality that was bigger than life and was unforgettable.

  Years ago Leigh was diagnosed with cancer. Wonderfully, the Lord healed him and gave him a reprieve. Later it came back and took him Home. Yet, even as he was dying, he was a faithful testimony for his Lord.

  25% of children live in fatherless homes. The percentage jumps off the page if you add those who have a Dad in the home, yet is virtually uninvolved with his children.  

  Men, if we will be sensitive to God’s leading, He’ll open our eyes to see young lives that we can minister to for His glory. We can make a huge difference just by being attentive and available. Most of the time it won’t be a huge investment. It’s amazing with young people how a little goes a long way. It starts with knowing their name, just noticing them. It might be that ornery neighbor kid or a young person here at church. I know it’s true! I’m where I am today because men invested in my life. Many of you have similar stories. Young people are our future. Please take the time and give of yourselves to invest in a life.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Men to Mimic

“My father didn’t tell me how to live. He lived

and let me watch him do it.” Clarence Budington Kelland

Where are the role models? Where does a boy or young man turn to learn to be a man today? Where do you look to learn what it means to be a husband, father or even a grandfather? Who’s your example on what it means to be an employee, neighbor, friend or Christian?

  We need role models. Every man needs to ask himself: Who is my role model and why? There are many potential “role models” out there. Yet, who is truly worthy of emulating? For the most part, not sports stars, movie stars or business leaders. A cursory examination of their lives quickly reveals that though they seem to have it all, they lack that which has true significance. Too many have a long history of broken relationships and lack character. Young men often will idolize their father. With the breakdown of the home, that can be a recipe for future disaster. Do they want to be like a father who failed at being a husband and father? So, where can we turn?

  God’s Word commands the local church to choose godly men as leaders, (1 Timothy 3:1-13). It’s noteworthy that what the world values is not on God’s list for what the church is to value. Essentially, it’s an anti-world checklist. At Grace we’re very blessed with godly men who serve as Deacons and as our Seniors Citizens Pastor. They’re not perfect. They, too, are sinners saved by grace, yet they love the Lord and seek to follow Him. So, if you’re looking for a role model, you don’t have to look very far.

  Travis Brinks. You don’t have to be around Travis long to discover that Travis deeply loves two people – his wife, Amy, and his daughter, Eva. Though a young man, Travis has maturity beyond his years. Serious, yet he doesn’t take life too seriously. He’s one of the most even tempered men that I’ve ever met. He also has a deeply tender side and loves people. He has a sharp mind, yet Travis has something much greater than intellect. He has wisdom. He’s willing to step out on faith and take risks, even with people, yet is never foolhardy. Compassion is one of his greatest strengths.

  Bruce Ranke. I’ve met few leaders over the years who wear the coat of humility as well as Bruce. It’d embarrass him for someone to suggest he’s humble, but he is. Continually, self-abasing yet gifted and talented. Bruce has a very rare gift in our sports obsessed culture – he’s an athlete and avid competitor, yet at the end of the day, he knows that “it’s only a game.” He has a dry wit that sneaks up on you, yet doesn’t take life too seriously. Maybe it’s from growing up on a farm, I’m not sure. Bruce won’t settle for the status quo or “pat answers.” One of his greatest values on our leadership team is his willingness to think outside of the box and ask the hard questions. He’s committed to his wife, Debbie, and their three, now adult sons, parents and grandchildren. There’s a tenderness that always touches my heart as I watch him interact with his granddaughter. He’s a godly man who is both tough and tender.

  Ron Strelow. If you look up the word “dependable” in the dictionary, you might find Ron’s picture. Not flashy, yet steady. Ron never wants to be a bother, yet seemingly is never bothered at being “bothered.” Like our other leaders, Ron is known for his kindness. Ron is able to step back, be objective and biblically problem-solve. On Sundays it’s often Ron who initiates praying for the worship service. No fanfare, yet he knows that this is God’s work and needs His empowerment and blessing. Gentle spirited enough to minister to children yet strong enough to stand for biblical convictions and worldview. Ron has the gift of listening, a gift that’s increasingly rare.  

  Ray Ziebell. If you walk through the doors at Grace and Ray doesn’t introduce himself, it’s because he was out of town. Ray was the first leader that I met when I came to Grace in 1988 and has been my friend and partner in ministry for some 31 years. Ray has many gifts and passions, yet his one consuming passion is that he wants to share with others that Jesus died for their sins, they too can be forgiven and go to heaven. Another humble man, Ray is quick to admit his failings and shortcomings, even if he’s the only one who sees them. He’s toughest on himself. Nearly insatiably curious about the wonder of creation, his passion for what God is doing is wonderfully infectious. He’s a friend to the friendless and filled with incredible Christlike optimism. Nearly sixty years ago, Ray received God’s generous grace and like his Lord is generous with his life.

  Gary Thompson. They say that “still waters run deep.” That’s Pastor Gary Thompson. His two primary loves in his life that he never stops talking about are Jesus Christ and his wife, Nancy. Though quiet and non-assuming, he’s a man of great discernment. God has already used him at Grace to touch the lives of our older saints. They’ve quickly found in Pastor Gary a man that befriends others and cares for them easily. He has deep faith, is willing to ask questions and graciously disagree without being disagreeable. We were blessed when Gary and Nancy walked through our doors and doubly blessed when Gary agreed to join our ministry team.

  Great men, true heroes whose lives count for eternity, are rarely found in a sports arena or under the glare of stage lights. They’re not often found in the halls of Wall Street or the corridors of Congress. Those men and their “accomplishments are truly here today and gone tomorrow.” As the Psalmist said, they’re like “grass…in the morning it flourishes and is renewed; in the evening it fades and withers.” The men our world honors often only have gifts for this short, vaporous life.

  You have to look for them, but God continues to raise up men of character and godliness for His Kingdom. Men whose examples we all would do well to emulate, they live for eternity. They are in a constant personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

  All of us follow someone. Who are you following? Rubbing shoulders with you week after week at Grace are men who are godly examples of what it means to be a man who has a heart for Jesus and pleases His Lord.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

We lost more than the Boy Scouts

“Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy.”

  Recently, the Boy Scouts of America announced that the organization will begin accepting girls as members, thus ending their uniqueness. Many commentators have lamented the moral decline of the Boy Scouts, seen in the organization’s continued capitulation to the ideology of contemporary mores. Since its inception, the Boy Scouts offered a pathway from boyhood to manhood, a vision of the good life that brought together nature and nurture and lifting up a moral vision to be pursued and cherished.

  Spending time outdoors with others in community was a way of traveling the ancient path of wisdom and virtue. Wisdom: learning how to flourish by living according to the grain of the universe. Virtue: choosing patterns of life that lead to the development of moral intuitions and character growth.

  The Scouts offered a way for boys to track their progression toward the fulfillment of an idealized manhood. All the knot-tying and skills-learning were primarily about bringing yourself in line with the way the world works. It was about preparing and becoming a man, a man of character.

  Today’s culture overflows with examples of “boy-men”– men who live in perpetual adolescence, never quite outgrowing juvenile behavior. Achievement today is mastering the latest video game, winning at beer pong, or sexual triumphs. Earlier generations of men achieved the traditional benchmarks of masculine maturity via marriage, parenting, stable employment, and a completed education by their twenties.

  Very few do that today. Over the past several years, there have been a number of studies conducted where thousands of women were asked what traits come to mind when they think of the typical man today. Commonly used labels weren’t complimentary. They used terms like: Narcissistic, Perverted, Emotionally stunted, Deficient in communication skills, Unreliable, Afraid of commitment, Lazy. The typical profile of a 25-year old man today is drastically different than it was in past generations.

  We could bemoan this, criticize and even ridicule young men…or we could do something supremely biblical. We censure the next generation for being irresponsible, so why don’t we determine to take responsibility to help the next generation in our midst? As a church, we can be part of the solution. We must seek to encourage redemptive manhood. It’s an ancient path that hasn’t gone away. It includes wisdom and virtue, though showered by divine grace. This path is clearer and more appealing than ever. The One who walked it before us made sure that it was narrow.

  What can we do to give godly guidance to young men? There’s no magic formula. God must be at work in teaching us and our boys. It’s God that must be the one who causes them to grow (1 Corinthians 3:7), but we can plant and water. A vital way though that we can help the next generation is by first modeling for them what it is to be a man. So, what are some marks of maturity? In the Bible, maturity is always spiritual. It’s wisdom in knowing God and His will and applying it to your life (Proverbs 1:1-7).

  Each Christian man must determine to set an example by his own manhood. He must commit to be like Paul, who said, “Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ.” That’s a big challenge and every man fails to live up to it at some point. In no special order, here are some traits that we must teach to boys to help them become men.

  Take responsibility. Boys run from responsibility; men run toward it. Men hold down a job, know what it is to be committed and act maturely. If he doesn’t, then he’s little more than a boy with a beard (Prov. 10:1).

  Have a backbone. Being a man means you must have the courage to take a stand for what’s right. It means speaking up for the powerless, defending the weak, fighting injustice and fighting for your family (1 Cor. 13:13).

  If you have a wife and family, provide for them. Your wife and children must know you’re willing to go hungry to make sure that they don’t. It’s not the government’s job to take care of them. It’s yours. There’s no shame in asking for assistance if you need it, but you must be willing to work hard and take an unfulfilling job to take care of your family (2 Thes. 3:10).  

  Control your emotions. Emotions are God-given. There are healthy and important ways to express them. Don’t be ruled by them. If you don’t learn to master anger and other emotions, they’ll master you (Prov. 29:11).

  Keep your commitments. Pay your debts, keep your word, and always speak the truth. When you’ve blown it, admit it and seek forgiveness. Don’t make your decisions based on your feelings; make your choices based on your commitments (Psalm 15:4).

  Trust God. God made you and His plan for your life is the only plan that counts. Don’t be foolishly prideful so that you try to do it on your own. Life is meant to be lived in relationship and dependence on Him. If you walk with Him, you’re always headed in the right direction! (Prov. 3:5-6).

  A godly man isn’t perfect. None of us will reach perfection until we’re in the presence of Jesus. A godly man though embraces manhood and knows that Jesus, not a lost world, sets the standard for what it means to be a man. He strives daily to model his life after Christ. He doesn’t excuse sin or weakness, but continually surrenders those areas to God and asks for His grace in overcoming them. Regardless of physical appearance, social status, or economic standing, each man can be a godly man if he loves God with all his heart and seeks to obey Him in every area of his life. 

  May God give us godly men and may God help us to help the young men in our midst to mature into being godly men! 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.