To Tell The Truth

 

“When regard for truth has been broken down or even slightly weakened, all things will remain doubtful.” Augustine

 
A store manager heard his clerk tell a customer, “No, ma’am, we haven’t had any for a while, and it doesn’t look as if we’ll be getting any soon.” Horrified, the manager came running over to the customer and said, “Of course we’ll have some soon. We placed an order last week.”
  Then, the manager drew the clerk aside. “Never,” he snarled, “Never, never, never say we’re out of anything- say we’ve got it on order and it’s coming. Now, what was it she wanted anyway?” The clerk said, “Rain!”
  Ours is a dishonest world. Honesty is sacrificed…often for greed. It seems that in election years, the lies are more plentiful and flagrant. But God’s Word repeatedly reminds us that God is the God of truth, and His people are commanded to be people of truth. A healthy church—a body of believers that follows Jesus as the head must be a place of truth. It’s where we love each other enough to be honest and admonish each other truthfully when needed. It’s a place where we’re lovingly truthful about the sins that cause us to stumble because sin has such damaging consequences.
  One University of Massachusetts study found “that 60 percent of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.” The study also found lies told by men and women differ in content, but not in quantity: “Women were more likely to lie to make the person they were talking to feel good, while men lied most often to make themselves look better.”

  In Ephesians 4:15-16 Paul writes: “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.” Apparently, the church in Ephesus had a truth problem. They’d gotten to the point where they preferred hearing stuff that made them feel good rather than what was true.

  One of the benefits of connecting with other believers is their ability to see sin in us that we’re blind to. We need this aspect of body life because part of the damage sin causes is blindness. We can see the speck of sin in another person’s eye but may be blind to the 2 x 4 plank that’s in our own.
  In God’s Word of truth, we’re reminded of how sin does this. 1 John 1:8 talks about Christians who deceive themselves by thinking they’re without sin. “If we claim we are without sin, we deceive ourselves—and the truth is not in us.” Here are a few more. Obadiah 1:3, “The pride of your heart has deceived you.” Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.” Our sin blinds and deceives us. Author Michael Novak put it this way: “Our capacity for self-deception has no known limits.” We deceive ourselves all the time into thinking we’re better than we are. One of the biggest lies is that most of us think we’re basically good. We’re not.
  Remember that famous scene from the movie, A Few Good Men? Jack Nicholson is on the witness stand and Tom Cruise says, “I just want the truth.”  Nicholson screams, “You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!” He has a point. The fact is the truth we need to hear can be very hard to handle. It’s hard to honestly admit our failures and flaws.
  Yet there’s a vital part of truth that’s life giving and sustaining. Jesus said, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free” (John 8:31). So, the truth about the truth is this – it will set you free, but first it can make you miserable. Some pain and misery are necessary for spiritual growth.
  We need to see our own sin—we have to face it—we have to handle it—if we’re going to move forward on toward spiritual maturity. A Christian who can’t admit that he or she is wrong is not growing toward Christlikeness. Remember God opposes the proud. He only gives grace to the humble.
  That’s why we need body life, close spiritual friendships and small groups. It’s where the power of connecting with other Christians comes in. Those who know us, really know us, will see things about us that we miss.
  Did you know we can only see about 60% of our body without a mirror or a reflective surface of some sort? Its why wives ask their husbands that dangerous question: “How do I look?” All kidding aside, others can see things about us that we’re blind to. If those who really know us truly love us, they’ll tell us when we are walking around with a two by four in our eye. They’ll tell us the truth, the truth we need to hear. They’ll tell us when we’ve got a sin problem and don’t look or act so good.
  In June of 1938, J.R.R. Tolkien, author of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, wrote a letter to his editor Stanley Unwin explaining why he was behind schedule finishing the final draft for The Hobbit. Tolkien told Unwin that instead of drafting more material, he had decided to start over and rewrite the first three chapters.
  What motivated Tolkien to go back and start the whole thing over again? It was the loving criticism he had received from his friend, C. S. Lewis. Apparently, Lewis read chapters, liked the story, and encouraged Tolkien, but he also took the time to critique it and make specific suggestions for its improvement. For instance, Lewis told Tolkien that there was too much dialogue, too much chatter, too much “silly hobbit talk.” According to Lewis, all this dialogue was dragging down the story line. 
  Tolkien grumbled in response to Lewis, “The trouble is that ‘hobbit talk’ amuses me—more than adventures.”
  Yet he still accepted the advice. Also, in the first draft of The Lord of the Rings, the story centers on a hobbit named Bingo, who sets out with two companions, Odo Took and Frodo Took. As Tolkien does revisions, Bingo becomes Frodo, and is joined by his friends Sam and Pippin. I wonder, would The Lord of the Rings have been nearly so popular if the main character had been called Bingo? But more than just names have been transformed. Tolkien’s revised version is shorter and much clearer, too.
  When J.R.R. Tolkien rewrote the material, he cut nearly half of the dialogue.  On page after page, he deleted long conversations and picked up the action. As a fan of those books, I don’t think I would have enjoyed them as much without Lewis’ input.
  Each of us needs a C.S. Lewis in our lives. We need someone to encourage us on toward God’s best. Are you open to one in your life? Are you a Lewis in someone else’s life? We will never be the mature Christians God desires us to be or the church that glorifies Him until we learn to “speak the truth in love.”

Can we help you spiritually? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

The “Doctor of Dishonesty” is Dishonest

“The truth doesn’t cost you anything, but a lie could cost you everything.”

  A recent news story, “A Famous Honesty Researcher Is Retracting A Study Over Fake Data” was one of those “Are you serious?” moments.

  Renowned psychologist Dan Ariely literally wrote the book on dishonesty. He was known as “Dr. Dishonesty.” But now some are questioning whether the scientist himself is dishonest. 

  His landmark study that endorsed a simple way to curb cheating is going to be retracted nearly a decade later after a group of scientists found that it was based on lies, faked data. According to the 2012 paper, when people signed an honesty declaration at the beginning of a form, rather than the end, they were less likely to lie. It was a seemingly cheap and effective method to combat fraud and was adopted by companies and government agencies around the globe. It made a splash among academics, who cited it in their own research hundreds of times. Apparently, Dr. Ariely, a frequent TED Talk speaker and Wall Street Journal columnist – lied about his experiments and data. The psychologist who literally wrote the book on dishonest behavior is just another liar. 

  Let’s be honest though. Most people don’t think lying is that big of a deal. It’s not like it’s stealing or murder and we easily rationalize it. Spouses lie to each other in the name of keeping the peace; parents lie to their children and vice versa, employers and employees play the game. Advertisers lie to increase the bottom line. Politicians are renowned for “fake news.” 

  Yet, even many of the people of truth, Christians, don’t view lying as the grievous sin that it is. Christians who’d never steal, watch porn or swear, think little of the sin of lying and don’t consider it a moral wrong. While their lies may not be blatant. They may rationalize their little “white lies.” Yet, they’re a violation of God’s standard of absolute truth. 

  There’s a scene in the movie Something's Gotta Give that succinctly captures. After catching the man she loves on a date with another woman, Diane Keaton is chased out of the restaurant by a guilty and distraught Jack Nicholson. When he finally stops her, he pleads, “I have never lied to you, I have always told you some version of the truth.” She replies, “The truth doesn’t have versions, okay?” And that's the truth. The truth may have many sides. It may be complicated or hard to understand, but it exists. It doesn’t have versions. It’s what makes truth the truth. 

  Yet, many of God’s children have trouble with the truth. We may not be outright liars, but we shade it to make it fit more comfortably into our lives, to prevent it from disrupting them from our careers to our relationships.  

  What does the Bible say about truth? The Bible teaches that truth isn’t an abstract idea or philosophical puzzle. It teaches instead that…

  Truth is a person­—the person of Jesus Christ. Jesus said to His disciples, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me” (John 14:6). The Apostle John, reflecting on the whole of Jesus’ life, wrote, “The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us. We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” In Jesus truth took on human nature. Jesus is the truth and lived a completely truthful life. 

  God Is True. In order to understand more fully what the Bible means when it says that Jesus is the truth, we need to understand that truth is an attribute of God’s nature. God is true. Scripture repeats this over and over: “This God—His way is perfect; the Word of the Lord proves true; He is a shield for all those who take refuge in Him.”

  All that God is and does is trustworthy. Every word He speaks is true. It’s why we can run to Him, throw ourselves on Him, depend totally on Him because He is true. Because God is true, all truth belongs to Him and finds its ultimate meaning in Him. 

  All God Says Is True. In a letter to one of his coworkers, Paul used this vital wording that God “does not lie.” One of the Psalms writes, “All Your words are true…” (Ps. 119:160). God’s Word, the Bible, is true because God is the God of truth. Lying is rooted in the Fall of man (Genesis 3). God created a world originally birthed in truth. It was when sin invaded and perverted creation that lying poisoned our world. 

  Lying is rooted then in our souls but most lying doesn’t start with lying to others, it starts with first lying to ourselves. How does someone become a convincing liar? They begin to believe their own lies. The dishonesty of the soul produces the lies of the life. As Fyodor Dostoyevsky said, “Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.” 

  Lying is culturally acceptable and easily contaminates Christians, who, are because they are children of the God of truth, must be people of truth. 

  Where are we most tempted to lie? When we feel a sense of shame like being late for an appointment or caught in an awkward situation. We lie when we fear the truth will hurt or complicate a relationship, failing to realize that the lie will cause more damage than the truth ever will. Dishonesty is an IED to a relationship. 

  Christians too easily lie when it comes to financial matters, like on our income taxes or selling a car or other product, or when you owe someone money. Exaggerating is a form of lying. We must be careful with the truth if we’re told a rumor or are reminiscing and telling a story when we tell someone how much we paid for something or when asked for our opinion or advice. 

  What must we do when we lie? Confess it to God (1 John 1:9) and He immediately forgives us. Jesus died and paid for all of our lies on the cross. Then, come clean with the one you lied to (James 5:16). 

  When we admit that we were dishonest, it does two things. Often the other person begins to respect us for coming clean and secondly, the shame from the admission is an incentive against further lies or deception. 

  How can we get a firmer handle on truth and honesty? Love the truth. Philippians 4:8 urges us to meditate on the truth. We must learn the truth by saturating our minds with good things, like the Word of God. The truth will set you free. Live the truth. Ephesians 4:25, “So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.” (NLT).  

  God is a God of truth. We are to be people of truth. It’s evidence of our spiritual DNA, that we know Jesus and God is our Heavenly Father! 

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Will YOU stop lying?

“Honesty may not always be the best policy, as a policy, but dishonesty is always a miserable policy, even when it succeeds.”   Iain Duguid

  You just can’t make this stuff up. In a recent debate between New York Governor Andrew Cuomo and his opponent, actress Cynthia Nixon, it became very heated as they battled for the Democratic primary nomination in the gubernatorial election. In one more contentious moments Cuomo demanded Nixon stop interrupting him, whereupon she said she would do so if he stopped lying. “Excuse me, can you stop interrupting?” Cuomo exclaimed. To which Nixon retorted, “Can you stop lying?” “Yeah, as soon as you do,” Cuomo responded as laughter erupted from the audience.

  Are you like me? When I hear promises or see accusations about a political opponent, I’m very skeptical. Please don’t get me wrong. There are some elected officials with integrity and a true commitment to honesty. It’s just that they seem to be very rare. Usually, I find them more often on the local level, rather than the national one.

  Much of it, I’m sure, is because I’m an adult child of an addict, but I have very little tolerance for lying. We survivors of an addicted parent were lied to so much in our formative years that it’s left a deep scar.

  Then, our culture has lost any value for honesty or truth. We’ve developed a litany of terms to soften lying: White lies. Fibs. Exaggerations. Ideology trumps truth. Yet, they’re still lies. In a court of law, it’s called perjury. They are falsehoods, fabrications and deceptions.

  As much as try, as much as we detest it – all of us have been guilty of lying. Lying is probably the most frequently committed sin. While we may put “degrees” on lying, it’s still a lie. We rationalize that “a little white lie” to save someone’s feelings isn’t that bad. After all, we’re just trying to make them feel good, right?

  Parents lie to children, thinking little of it, “No, this doesn’t have onions in it.” We lie to cover failure, “I’d have been here on time but the traffic was terrible.” As innocent as a lie may seem, with a holy God, there are no degrees of lying. ALL lies are sinful and violate His standard of truth.

  What many don’t realize is that lying is Satan’s native language. You and I are never more like the devil than when we lie. All that he does is lie. That should cause you to gasp! I know it does me. In John 8:44, Jesus is talking about Satan and states, “He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”

  The first time Satan speaks in the Bible, he lies to Eve. When we lie, we intentionally deceive. There’s usually a conscious decision made each time we do it. Because God is truth, when we lie, we’re in direct opposition to His will. Just as it cost our first parents so much, lying has a high price tag.

  Lying destroys relationships. After you’ve been lied to, you know how difficult it can be to trust that person again. You can’t help but wonder why a friend or family member would treat you so poorly. When you lie, even if you think others will never find out, you’ll create a chasm of hurt in your relationship. If the other person finds out about your lie, as they frequently do, it’s very difficult to regain trust. No one wants a relationship based on lies. Truth and trust are foundational to healthy relationships.

  Lying destroys YOU. It throws you into a vicious cycle that’s extremely difficult to break free of. Once you lie, often you’ll lie again to cover up the first lie. Then, you feel worse. Lies are like weeds. They grow, rarely standing alone. If you don’t kill the first lie, it mutates, reproducing and becoming hard to stop. Lying is addictive. You so habitually lie, you have difficulty knowing what’s actually true as you begin to lie to yourself.

  Liars become trapped in a cycle of lying controlled by fear. They’re anxious of not only being found out as a liar, but also being exposed and having the truth uncovered about themselves. And it always comes with a high price. Lying destroys lives. Relationships crumble. Others refuse to trust you. Ultimately, the one most hurt by lying is you.

  Tragically, because lying is socially acceptable and even encouraged, it’s only through God’s grace, the God of truth, that we can be consistently honest. How can we be people of honesty and integrity?

  Honesty must become a godly discipline, a spiritual habit. Each morning I pray that the Lord will give me wisdom for that day. Wisdom always includes honesty. As God gives me wisdom, I speak (and post) the truth.

  When you lie, deal with it immediately. It’s embarrassing, yet a noxious weed is easier to kill while it’s small. More than once, I’ve had to call up a friend and apologize that I’d exaggerated or not been completely forthright.  Healthy shame helps me in the future be more cautious with my words.

  Be committed to speaking the truth in love. That’s the biblical command and control we find in Ephesians 4:15. Friends sometimes must say the tough things. Some speak the truth, yet wield it like a baseball bat. Others speak with love, yet love void of truth is worthless sentimentality. Like the Lord Jesus, we must commit to speaking both truth and love.

  Please know that honesty will probably cost you. It certainly cost professional golfer, Brian Davis…perhaps up to $2 million. In 2010 at the Verizon Heritage Classic, Davis thought that he’d inadvertently ticked a reed in his backswing, so he called over rules officials to review the video. He had. It cost him the Masters and countless endorsement bonuses. 

  You can’t be a Christian and be a liar (Revelation 21:8). Jesus said, “I am the Truth.” To follow Him, we must live by His standard of truth telling.

  In our culture tolerance is the norm. “Truth” is subjective. It’s purported that there are no absolutes. Being sincere is what really matters.

  That’s all a lie. As the people of the God of absolute truth, we know truth is the norm. There is a right and there is a wrong. There are absolutes. One can be sincere and sincerely wrong. Truth is always truth, always has been and always will be. Truth never changes. As Christ-followers, we must commit to being people of truth, no matter what!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

The word of the year is "Post-Truth"???

“Truthiness: the quality of seeming or being felt to be true, even if not necessarily true.”  Stephen Colbert

  One of my favorite apps on my smart phone is a dictionary program. When we go on vacation, if there’s a strong possibility we won’t have cell service so I can’t access it, I’ll pack a dictionary.

  Oxford Dictionaries recently announced The Word of the Year for 2016. It’s “POST-TRUTH.” Talk about a “huh?” moment.

  “Post-truth” is defined as “an adjective relating to or denoting circumstances in which objective facts are less influential in shaping public opinion than appeals to emotion and personal belief.” Sadly, post-truth is not new. This concept has been in existence for some time. It’s just that Oxford Dictionaries have seen a spike in frequency of questions regarding post-truth this past year with the political situations in Britain and the U.S.A. It’s an outcome of postmodernism and relativism. Words devolve so that eventually they have little definable meaning.

  This compound word, post-truth, exemplifies an expansion in the meaning of the prefix “post” that’s become increasingly prominent in recent years. Instead of simply referring to the time after a specified situation or event, as in post-war or post-match, the prefix in post-truth has a meaning more like “belonging to a time in which the specified concept has become unimportant or irrelevant.”

  Post-truth appears to have been first used in a 1992 essay by late Serbian-American playwright Steve Tesich in The Nation magazine. Reflecting on the Iran-Contra scandal and the Persian Gulf War, Tesich lamented that “we, as a free people, have freely decided that we want to live in some post-truth world.” A book, The Post-truth Era, by Ralph Keyes appeared in 2004. Comedian Stephen Colbert, has popularized an informal word related to post-truth, truthiness, defined as “the quality of seeming or being felt to be true, even if not necessarily true.”

  Rather than wringing our hands or clucking our tongues, a post-truth world presents opportunities as well as challenges for the Church. Ours is a skeptical, cynical age where truth is increasingly in short supply.

  Be honest. Who do you really trust? Cynicism begins to creep into our hearts, contaminating our outlook on life. It’s not the way God wants us to live. His will is for us to choose to focus on the truth (Philippians 4:8). Polls show we don’t trust that our leaders, political or corporate are telling us the truth. If we listen to someone in the media with a different worldview than ours, we listen cynically, even questioning their integrity and commitment to truth. We’ve reached a sad point where we expect lawyers, lobbyists, journalists, talk-show hosts, politicians and anyone else on the public stage to spin truth in a self-serving way. Truth is devalued and sometimes totally lost. Lloyd Steffen insightfully observed, “Honesty now looks like a dubious virtue if not an actual vice. It is studied and examined as a stratagem rather than as a hallmark of character.”

  We can make a difference! Truth is not optional for the Church. God commands us, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor” (Ex. 20:16). Honesty is the first rule of all relationships. The New Testament further unpacks this, “Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another” (Ephesians 4:25). In a culture where words are increasing exponentially and truth is cheap, believers are to always tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. For the Christ-follower, “truthiness” or “post-truth” are never options.

  Yet, commitment to truth is a choice. Scripture warns us that our hearts are deceptive (Jeremiah 17:9). Lying is easy, even “natural” because of sin. It’s all-consuming. Only the Holy Spirit can reveal how greatly entrenched deception is in our hearts. I question if it’s possible to persuade someone who is dishonest to be truthful. Instead, they must first be confronted with the truth of God’s Word. It’s the revelation of God’s Word and holiness which dispels deception and reveals our sinfulness.

  We must also realize how vile lying is – it’s Satanic. Satan was the first liar. Lying is so repugnant to God that the only instance we find of Him striking someone dead in the New Testament was when Ananias and Sapphira lied to the church (Acts 5). Afterwards, the Apostle Peter made two powerful observations – Satan had filled their hearts and they had lied to the Holy Spirit. If we wanted to convince people to be honest today that would work! Let a few members in the congregation keel over if they lied and everyone would immediately clean up their act.  

  Post-truth is a relationship murderer. We’re social beings. God designed us to need relationships to be happy and fulfilled. We innately want to get along with each another and live in harmony. That’s impossible if we can’t trust one another. When truth isn’t a given in a relationship, disappointment and insecurity are inevitable. Lying erodes the foundation necessary for healthy relationships, making real ones impossible. When we succumb to post-truth, we become very anxious about reaching out.

  It’s imperative that we’re able to trust one another if we’re going to be the healthy Body of Christ God designed us to be. As God defines what it means to be holy and pure, He also defines what it means to be truthful.  

  In some ways, dishonesty is like a person with allergies. When it’s determined what they’re allergic to, everything that causes them to react allergically is removed from their world. Post-truth causes God to react. God doesn’t just dislike sin. He hates it and will not tolerate its very presence. When we lie, we separate ourselves from Him, becoming like those described in Romans 1, “they exchange the truth of God for a lie.”

  “Post-truth” may be a new word. But it and no other word that’s describes someone dishonest should characterize a Christ-follower. God’s will is for every believer to be a committed truth-teller. We can’t do it in our strength. We need the Spirit’s power. God is the God of the truth. Christ-followers are to be people of truth. We’re to be different. Because of the new life we have in Christ, we must always be known as the people of “present-truth.”

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.