“We
all have one life to live, but if we are too busy to notice the world revolving
around us, then we are not living.” Rexon Wilson
Sometimes
I’m concerned about ticking people off with what I write, but not this time. The
ones that might be ticked off with my words here will probably never get around
to reading it – they’re just too busy.
What is it about “busyness” and American culture?
Unfortunately, I have to confess that I’m a fellow sufferer. Some how we find
value in being busy but it’s a skewed yardstick of significance. If you ask the
average person, “How are you?” if they don’t mumble the obligatory “fine,” they
nearly always hone in on our cultural default, “busy” or “I’m just so busy.”
Sadly, it’s not just adults. A long, long
time ago in a galaxy far away, kids actually got together after school or on
weekends just to – play. Not any more,
if a kid drops by a neighbor kid’s home to see if they can come out to play or
just “hang,” if they’re even home, it has to be scheduled. And it’s not for a
day or even a morning or afternoon, it’s perhaps half an hour or hour to just
play. (Not to mention that play is often a video game requiring little
creativity or imagination). Then, between sports, music lessons and homework –
add a whole other factor with a blended family and rotating weekends – children
are nearly as exhausted as their chauffeurs, I mean parents. From the CEO to grade
school students, everyone talks about their packed schedule. There’s just no
room for anything else.
Yet, perhaps we should delete the word “busy”
and replace that whole concept with something a lot more honest. Instead of the
word “busy,” what if we used the term “prioritizing my time.” We don’t somehow
squeeze events or people into a frantic schedule, instead we must make a choice
to consciously schedule time. On a larger scale, let’s stop complaining we’re
too busy. Let’s tell the truth instead, which is: “I haven’t prioritized my
time for that.” “Busy” is something that happens to us; prioritizing our time
is something we make a conscious decision about.
Rather than looking at your schedule and
thinking “I’m too busy,” instead, look at your schedule and ask yourself, “How
am I prioritizing my time?” For most of us, this one change will cause us to
think differently about our schedule. We can then move forward and begin
looking for better ways to control our schedule, instead of acting like we’re puppets
on a string, even victims, and letting it control us.
Horribly destructive time use habits start
early, very early. It’s so much a part of our culture that we never consider
that something might be wrong. How did we end up living like this? Why do we do
this to ourselves? Why do we do this to our children? When did we forget that
we’re human beings, not doings? Whatever happened to a world where kids get dirty,
messy…even bored? Do we have to love our children so much that we over schedule
them, making them stressed and busy — just like us? What happened to a world in
which we can sit with the people we love and have slow conversations about the
state of our heart and soul, conversations that slowly unfold, conversations
with pregnant pauses and silences that we’re in no rush to fill? How did we
create a world in which we have more and more to do with less time for leisure,
less time for reflection, less time for community, less time to just be? As Socrates
said, “The unexamined life is not worth
living.” Yet, how are we supposed to have time to even examine our lives
when we’re already so inordinately busy?
Everyone has the same amount of time – 24
hours a day. To break free from the prison of the overly busy, you must first have
an escape plan. It’s not going to be easy. There will be peer pressure,
criticism and even perhaps shaming. You must persevere and determine to be a
little ruthless.
Where do we start? We must determine
to ruthlessly cut unnecessary stuff out of our lives. Before we can determine
what’s necessary and unnecessary, we must have a biblical worldview because what’s
valuable to an unbeliever and what’s valuable to a Christ-follower are very
different.
For example, to a non-believer, material
things and position have great value. Yet, to have things and position demands
more hours working to pay for those things and to maintain that position, not
to mention the potential opportunity of moving up the ladder. But then you’re
often so “busy,” you rarely have time to enjoy those things you’re working so
many hours to pay for. The position that you thought that you needed often
becomes a ball and chain, rather than a springboard to fulfillment.
A believer realizes that things, position,
etc. are merely tools. They’re to be managed for God’s glory and purpose, to be
enjoyed as gifts from a loving Heavenly Father. To get though to that position
is going to require being a bit ruthless. One of the most dangerous American
myths is that “you can have it all.” You can’t. You must choose. To have the
best, you must be ruthless and determined in your choice.
How do we accomplish this? First, we
must be very acquainted with God’s instruction Book, the Bible. You’ll never
have the right values if you’re using the wrong playbook. Then, pray and ask
God for wisdom in choosing and evaluating (James 1:5). After you have done
that…
Begin to set your priorities. This isn’t all that complicated: God, marriage,
family, church family, vocation, community, personal space, etc. Those are basic
for everyone. With those priorities in mind, what do you want to accomplish in
your life? Where do you want to be in a month? Six months? A year? What do you
need to do each day to get there? Put daily and weekly time blocks in your
calendar. Begin with the non-negotiables, then fill in any time left with the
non-essentials.
Plan ahead. Life is a lot like building a house. You start with a
set of plans. Then, you secure the materials and workers to begin the project. If
you have no plan and are unprepared, that house is going to take a long, long
time to build.
Change the way you describe your time. Instead of saying to yourself or others that “you’re
just too busy,” instead say “I’ve chosen not to prioritize that” because that’s
the truth. Whenever you don’t do something in your life, it’s because you’ve
chosen not to prioritize that activity. But choosing to prioritize useless
activity over active steps that coincide with your values and towards your life
goals is a choice you’ll regret.
So how’s your week looking? Have you allowed
yourself to become so busy that you can’t see straight? Are the days ticking by
without you reaching your goals? Or, are you consciously prioritizing your life
so you can focus on the most important? “So
teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalms
90:12).
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