“Unless
you're in a James Bond movie, it's really unlikely that the pressure that
you're feeling is anything but self-induced.” Seth Godin
For many, Christmas, and being with family is
one of the highlights of the year. Yet, for many others…it’s anything but
“Peace on earth.” Already, you’re dreading the obligatory holiday gatherings.
Hopefully, most of that dread is not within your own family but with extended
family.
Yet, some of the tension is self-induced. Some
of us have watched too many sappy Christmas movies. We’ve allowed ourselves to
succumb to idealism and need to
replace it with a healthy dose of realism.
If you and your spouse tend to periodically squabble the other 364 days, like
most married couples, it’s highly possible that you’re going to have a
disagreement on December 25th, too. If your children fight, complain
and whine the other 364 days of the year…like most children, it’s nearly
guaranteed they’re going to do that on December 25th, too. Our sin
natures don’t go comatose just because it’s Christmas. Why is that?
Many of us overextend ourselves financially,
particularly at Christmas. When we give a generous gift to someone,
particularly one of our children, and they’re not overjoyed with our gift, we
may be hurt…offended. But is it truly a gift? Or, is it a gift with strings in
that we expect appreciation?
When a gift is truly a gift, there are no
expectations. Gratitude is just an extra blessing. We also need to honestly ask
ourselves if we model gratitude. If our children do not see us thankful for
God’s blessings, His salvation, forgiveness, our church, job, home and
countless other blessings then what are they learning from us? It’s a reminder
to us to be continually thankful to our Heavenly Father for His constant bounty
of blessings in our lives. With knowing all that God has given me, shouldn’t my
life be filled with continual thanking of Him?
Many of us overextend ourselves physically, particularly
at Christmas. If you’re not getting adequate rest, you’ll have
difficulty controlling your spirit. Most of us find carnality more quickly
rises to the surface when we’re fatigued. If we’re biting off heads or finding
ourselves on the verge of an emotional meltdown, we’ve missed God’s plan of
“peace on earth.” We probably need to cut back on our obligations and be
willing to disappoint or irritate a well-meaning relative who insists “everyone
has to be there for Christmas.” As an adult or married couple, you need to wisely
do what’s best for you (and your family) both physically and spiritually.
And since Jesus wasn’t actually born on
December 25th, do we have to actually celebrate on December 25th?
If another day would make the time of getting together more pleasant for most, why
not schedule it for another day? The specific day isn’t the point, it’s the
getting together that’s important. While Christmas is an opportunity to
encourage family gatherings, it’s not a biblical command.
Many of us foolishly think it will be
different this time. If Uncle John drank too much last Christmas, he’ll
probably drink too much this year. If Aunt Martha was inappropriate last year,
she’ll probably be inappropriate this year. If Cousin Bob bragged about his new
car, new house, Harvard bound kids, etc., things aren’t likely to change. But
you can. You have the Holy Spirit indwelling you. You should be growing in your
Christian walk and can choose how you’ll respond. Romans 12:18 commands us, “If possible, so far as it depends on you,
live peaceably with all.”
Many of us are the only Christians at our Christmas
gathering. Some will be visiting family members who are contemptuous of
Christianity and even hostile to the gospel. Christmas isn’t the time to argue whether
Christ was born of Virgin or if the Bible is truly God’s Word.
The Holy Spirit brings peace (Gal. 5:22), and
believers are to be peacemakers (Matt. 5:9). Sometimes the divisiveness that
happens at extended family dinner tables isn’t because an unbelieving family
member decides to persecute a Christian, it’s because a Christian is a Crusader
rather than a missionary. While it’s true the gospel exposes sin, the gospel
does so strategically, in order to point the lost to Christ. Antagonizing
unbelievers at a family dinner table (or even a company Christmas party) because
they think like unbelievers isn’t the way of Christ. Some believers foolishly think
their belligerence is actually a sign of holiness. It’s not. Your presence
should be one of peace and tranquility. The gospel you believe ought to be what
disrupts, not you’re your own obnoxious argumentativeness. There’s a big
difference between the two.
And please keep the main thing the main
thing. Our country today is polarized on political differences and ideology. No
one is going to Heaven or Hell because they’re a Democrat or Republican,
because they’re a Liberal or a Conservative, or even a member of the Tea Party
or a card carrying member of the ACLU. Amazingly, Jesus had those who were
ardent supporters of the Roman government and those who were fanatical revolutionaries
seeking to overthrow Rome
among His disciples. He taught and modeled for them to keep the main thing the
main thing. There is only one Government that ultimately matters – that’s His reign.
All of the rest are merely re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic of a doomed world. Personally, I
want to rescue as many as I can off this sinking ship as I can, don’t you? Christmas
with unsaved friends or family members isn’t the time for a political debate
that’s not going to make any ultimate difference whether it’s in DC or Madison. We must be
focused on eternity.
Jesus is the Prince of Peace and came to
bring “peace on earth.” He gave us the responsibility to share His message of
how to have peace with God. By His grace, let’s choose to let Him fill our
hearts with His peace so we can share it with those who don’t know Him. We’re
His ambassadors in a world that knows little of true peace. Jesus brought peace
through His humility, love and grace. That’s the starting place for us as well.
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