BUSY - the worst 4-letter word!

 

I’m so busy, I don’t even have time to think about being busy.

I’m so busy, my to-do list has a to-do list.

I’m so busy, I don’t know if I’m coming or going.

I’m so busy I make time fly.

I’m so busy even my dreams have deadlines.

I’m so busy I’ve invented my own time zone.

 
Time is the great equalizer. We all make or have different amounts of money. Each of us have different talents and abilities. We come from different backgrounds and live in different family dynamics. One thing though is consistent. We all have 24 hours every day and 168 hours every week. Nothing more, nothing less. Most of us feel very busy, but have you thought about why we are so busy?
  We let the urgent take priority over the important. Date nights with your spouse are important. Sleep and kids’ sports games are important. Yet, the phone call at work, the emails that need to be returned, the desire to make more money and achieve more at work, and the extra practices for our kids become much more urgent. We let the urgent steal our time.
  We’re people pleasers. We don’t want to let others down, so when a “need” arises, we jump in. Sometimes it means we choose time away from our families because we don’t want to tell someone, “No.” Too often it means that we don’t spend time with the Lord in reading our Bible or prayer. Proverbs 29:25 says, “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe.” We’re trapped when our lives are contaminated by what we want others to think of us. A solution is that we must accept the fact that we’re going to let some people down. That’s tough for people pleasers, yet vital so we can invest in what’s important.
  We don’t want to miss out! Do you have FOMO (fear of missing out)? We don’t want to miss out on anything, so we fill our calendars until they’re brimming over. We forget that God created us to be human beings, not human doings. Sadly, too, we miss out on what truly matters.
  John Rossman says that we’ve created “frantic family syndrome” We’ve succumbed to social peer pressure and think our kids need to be involved in everything – music lessons, dance lessons, t-ball, soccer, karate, scouting but our relationship with them suffers. Relationships are built on t-i-m-e. That can’t happen as you rush from commitment after commitment. It’s a common cultural lie that we’re neglecting our children if they’re not involved in nearly everything. We wouldn’t let them eat everything, so why do we feel that they must be involved in everything? 
  What’s the solution? PRIORITIES. You can’t do everything, so you must choose what’s vital and the most important. The good things in life are the worst enemies of the best things in life.
  One wise university professor would begin his first class each year by saying, “I am about to teach you the most important thing you’ll learn during your entire stay at this institution.” He then pulled out a large glass jar and set it on a table in front of him. Then, he produced about a dozen fist-sized rocks and carefully placed them, one at a time, inside the jar. When the jar was filled to the top he asked, “Is this jar full?” Everyone in the class said, “Yes.” Then he said, “Really?” He reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel, dumped some gravel in and shook the jar causing pieces of gravel to work themselves down into the spaces between the big rocks. Then he smiled and asked the group once more, “Is the jar full?” By this time the class was onto him. “Probably not,” one of them answered. “Good!” he replied. And he reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in and it went into all the spaces left between the rocks and the gravel. Once more he asked the question, “Is this jar full?” “No!” the class shouted and again he said, “Good!” Then he grabbed a jug of water and began to pour it in until the jar was filled to the brim. Then he looked up at the class and asked, “What is the point of this illustration?”
  One student raised his hand and said, “The point is, no matter how full your schedule is, if you try really hard, you can always fit some more things into it!” “No,” the professor  replied, “that’s not the point. The point is this: If you don’t put the big rocks in first, you’ll never get them in at all. Make sure you get the big rocks into your life first.”
  Personally, I try to never say that I’m “busy.” That seems to infer that I have less time than others, which isn’t true. What is true is that each of us chooses how we will use our daily 24 hours. If you own a business, then it’s wise to spend your time on what will make your business most profitable. The same is true of life. If you’re wise, you invest your time where it is best used and most profitable.
  Our responsibilities fall into one of four categories. Knowing where something fits helps us determine its priority and the time to invest in it. They are - Not urgent and not important. Then – Urgent but not important. Another is - Important but not urgent. Finally - Urgent and important.
  For example, if you’re married, how long do you plan to be married? Hopefully, you said “for life” (those vows before God do mean something). So, if I’m going to spend time with my spouse long after my work career is complete and the kids are grown, shouldn’t I make that relationship a top priority now and invest time in it so it’s healthy in the future?
  Here’s a reality check – you can fill your life with work, hobbies or activities, but if you’re in the hospital or really sick, your fellow employees and golfing buddies might send you a card…maybe. But the ones who will be there will be your family, unless you failed to invest in those relationships early on.
  So, if I’m going to spend eternity with One who loved me so much that He sacrificed His Son to die a horrible death for me, shouldn’t I get to know Him now? How can I rationalize that I’m too busy and never crack open my Bible or pray…unless I have an emergency? Do I only see God as some divine EMT or as my Abba-Father? As the Westminster Catechism notes fulfillment and purpose only comes from “Man’s chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy Him forever.” Spend time enjoying Him now so that you’re preparing for that relationship that will last all of eternity!  

Can we help you spiritually? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Making a Reset

“The greatest power you possess in life is your understanding that each day life gives you a fresh start any moment you choose to start fresh.” Guy Finley 

  Timanthes was an aspiring Greek artist during the Roman era. While studying under a well-respected tutor, he was nearing completion of a major painting. Upon arriving in the morning, he found the canvas blotted out with paint. Enraged, he confronted his teacher who admitted to destroying his work. His tutor said, “You were spending so much time admiring what you had done, that you were no longer improving. This was a great painting for some, but not for you. You can do much better.”
  So, Timanthes went to work again, energized with anger. But his mentor was right. The new and improved product became one of the most famous paintings of antiquity, Sacrifice of Iphigenia. Thanks to a little-known art teacher who insisted that his student do a reset and start over.
  This time of year, we reflect a lot on the past and the future. Networks carry programs reviewing highlights and low points from the past year. People talk about resolutions and goals for the coming year. It would be wise if we used this time as an opportunity for a reset.
  Now I’m not suggesting that you quit your marriage, your job, or ditch your kids, but you can have a new marriage, new kids, new job, etc., by resetting yourself. Reset being the husband/wife you are, reset your parenting, reset your reputation at work, reset your walk with the Lord.
  Making a reset takes something few are willing to invest. Many have a sense of dissatisfaction with the state of their life, yet they’re so busy doing that they fail to take the time to evaluate what they’re doing.
  2,500 years ago the great philosopher, Socrates warned: Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” Most of us are so busy that we fail to take the time to evaluate our lives. Or, worse we justify what we’re doing because it must be right because “everyone else is doing it.” But what if all of the birds are flying in the wrong direction. Your Mom was right, “just because everyone else jumps off the roof, doesn’t mean that you should too.”
  Making a reset requires taking time for evaluation. For the Christian it means taking some time alone with the Lord, praying, and asking for the wisdom that He’s promised to supply (James 1:5).
  Making a reset requires vulnerability with those who love you and are spiritually mature. For most of us our spouse is our greatest source of insights on where we need a reset. Those who love us the most usually know us the best. Ask these questions: If I could grow in one area this year, what do you believe I should grow in? If I made one change to improve our relationship this coming year, what would it be?
  Then, each of us needs a godly friend who will honestly speak into our lives. Just a word of caution. Sometimes our contemporaries and close friends are just that because there is no friction between us. Either they won’t risk confronting us or they think, value and look at life the same way we do. In others words, they don’t rock our boats. For a reset though we need spiritually mature friends who are willing to rock our boats.
  Solomon had such a friend in mind in Proverbs 27. In verse 5 Solomon writes, “Better is open rebuke than hidden love.” Verse 6, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend” and verse 9, “the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.” Having this kind of friend means having our world rattled and moving outside of our comfort zones.
  Making a reset requires having an eternal perspective. At this time of year, we’re blitzed with commercials about diet programs and fitness clubs.  Getting fit and physical exercise is important, but it will only help you for this brief life.
  The Bible compares our physical bodies to tents. If your neighbor had a tent in their backyard and spent tons of money redecorating, patching, and changing the colors to keep up with the latest trends, you’d think, “what a poor investment.” Most of us focus on the maintenance of our “tents,” yet neglect our souls.
  1 Timothy 4:8 says, “for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.” Making it a priority to daily spend time in your Bible and in prayer is an investment, not just for this temporal world, but for eternity.
  The average person spends a couple of hours on social media every day, yet we somehow rationalize that we don’t have time for God’s Word and prayer. What’s more important? The latest news or trends or God’s eternally good news that can change your life?
  The Lord Jesus gave His life for us and wants what’s best for us. He wants our lives to count for this world and for eternity. So, like an exercise program start small. If you begin with a Bible/Prayer marathon, you’ll soon quit. Consistency is more important than quantity. Determine to take 10 or 15 minutes a day with the Lord.
  Most find that starting in the morning is best. Otherwise, you find by the end of the day you’re just too tired. The reset many need is to simply start.
  Making a reset requires continually exercising your mind. Wise parents know that they have to teach their children to love more nutritious food than Happy Meals. God gave us our minds to be used. They need to be stretched and prodded.
  The average American reads four books a year. Most of us could easily read a book a month. It would only take 10 minutes a day. You probably spend more than that waiting for trains at railroad crossings. Stretching in our reading helps us reach this world. It helps us think more clearly and have a larger worldview.
  Before we blink we’ll be ringing in 2023. Let’s do a reset and wisely invest this year, making it the best year ever!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

I'm so busy....

“We all have one life to live, but if we are too busy to notice the world revolving around us, then we are not living.”  Rexon Wilson

Sometimes I’m concerned about ticking people off with what I write, but not this time. The ones that might be ticked off with my words here will probably never get around to reading it – they’re just too busy.

  What is it about “busyness” and American culture? Unfortunately, I have to confess that I’m a fellow sufferer. Some how we find value in being busy but it’s a skewed yardstick of significance. If you ask the average person, “How are you?” if they don’t mumble the obligatory “fine,” they nearly always hone in on our cultural default, “busy” or “I’m just so busy.”

  Sadly, it’s not just adults. A long, long time ago in a galaxy far away, kids actually got together after school or on weekends just to – play. Not any more, if a kid drops by a neighbor kid’s home to see if they can come out to play or just “hang,” if they’re even home, it has to be scheduled. And it’s not for a day or even a morning or afternoon, it’s perhaps half an hour or hour to just play. (Not to mention that play is often a video game requiring little creativity or imagination). Then, between sports, music lessons and homework – add a whole other factor with a blended family and rotating weekends – children are nearly as exhausted as their chauffeurs, I mean parents. From the CEO to grade school students, everyone talks about their packed schedule. There’s just no room for anything else.

  Yet, perhaps we should delete the word “busy” and replace that whole concept with something a lot more honest. Instead of the word “busy,” what if we used the term “prioritizing my time.” We don’t somehow squeeze events or people into a frantic schedule, instead we must make a choice to consciously schedule time. On a larger scale, let’s stop complaining we’re too busy. Let’s tell the truth instead, which is: “I haven’t prioritized my time for that.” “Busy” is something that happens to us; prioritizing our time is something we make a conscious decision about.

  Rather than looking at your schedule and thinking “I’m too busy,” instead, look at your schedule and ask yourself, “How am I prioritizing my time?” For most of us, this one change will cause us to think differently about our schedule. We can then move forward and begin looking for better ways to control our schedule, instead of acting like we’re puppets on a string, even victims, and letting it control us.

  Horribly destructive time use habits start early, very early. It’s so much a part of our culture that we never consider that something might be wrong. How did we end up living like this? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we do this to our children? When did we forget that we’re human beings, not doings? Whatever happened to a world where kids get dirty, messy…even bored? Do we have to love our children so much that we over schedule them, making them stressed and busy — just like us? What happened to a world in which we can sit with the people we love and have slow conversations about the state of our heart and soul, conversations that slowly unfold, conversations with pregnant pauses and silences that we’re in no rush to fill? How did we create a world in which we have more and more to do with less time for leisure, less time for reflection, less time for community, less time to just be? As Socrates said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” Yet, how are we supposed to have time to even examine our lives when we’re already so inordinately busy?

  Everyone has the same amount of time – 24 hours a day. To break free from the prison of the overly busy, you must first have an escape plan. It’s not going to be easy. There will be peer pressure, criticism and even perhaps shaming. You must persevere and determine to be a little ruthless.

  Where do we start? We must determine to ruthlessly cut unnecessary stuff out of our lives. Before we can determine what’s necessary and unnecessary, we must have a biblical worldview because what’s valuable to an unbeliever and what’s valuable to a Christ-follower are very different.

  For example, to a non-believer, material things and position have great value. Yet, to have things and position demands more hours working to pay for those things and to maintain that position, not to mention the potential opportunity of moving up the ladder. But then you’re often so “busy,” you rarely have time to enjoy those things you’re working so many hours to pay for. The position that you thought that you needed often becomes a ball and chain, rather than a springboard to fulfillment.

  A believer realizes that things, position, etc. are merely tools. They’re to be managed for God’s glory and purpose, to be enjoyed as gifts from a loving Heavenly Father. To get though to that position is going to require being a bit ruthless. One of the most dangerous American myths is that “you can have it all.” You can’t. You must choose. To have the best, you must be ruthless and determined in your choice.

  How do we accomplish this? First, we must be very acquainted with God’s instruction Book, the Bible. You’ll never have the right values if you’re using the wrong playbook. Then, pray and ask God for wisdom in choosing and evaluating (James 1:5). After you have done that…

  Begin to set your priorities. This isn’t all that complicated: God, marriage, family, church family, vocation, community, personal space, etc. Those are basic for everyone. With those priorities in mind, what do you want to accomplish in your life? Where do you want to be in a month? Six months? A year? What do you need to do each day to get there? Put daily and weekly time blocks in your calendar. Begin with the non-negotiables, then fill in any time left with the non-essentials.

  Plan ahead. Life is a lot like building a house. You start with a set of plans. Then, you secure the materials and workers to begin the project. If you have no plan and are unprepared, that house is going to take a long, long time to build.   

  Change the way you describe your time. Instead of saying to yourself or others that “you’re just too busy,” instead say “I’ve chosen not to prioritize that” because that’s the truth. Whenever you don’t do something in your life, it’s because you’ve chosen not to prioritize that activity. But choosing to prioritize useless activity over active steps that coincide with your values and towards your life goals is a choice you’ll regret.

  So how’s your week looking? Have you allowed yourself to become so busy that you can’t see straight? Are the days ticking by without you reaching your goals? Or, are you consciously prioritizing your life so you can focus on the most important? “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalms 90:12).