Kindness

“Cold words freeze people, and hot words scorch them, and bitter words make them bitter, and wrathful words make them wrathful. Kind words also produce their image on men’s souls; and a beautiful image it is. They smooth, and quiet, and comfort the hearer.” Blaise Pascal

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon.com, was ten years old when he saw a commercial stating that every puff a smoker took on a cigarette shortened his or her life by two minutes. Even back then he was quite a math whiz, so he began adding up how many minutes a long-time smoker like his grandmother had lost to cigarettes. To his surprise, Jeff’s grandmother began to cry when he announced that she had lost sixteen years of her life to smoking.

  His grandfather took him aside for a talking to. To Jeff’s surprise, his grandfather was not angry, nor did he attempt to punish him. He simply said, “You’ll learn one day that it is much harder to be kind than to be clever.”

  My mentor and quasi adopted Dad, Pastor David Cummins, taught me a lot of things. His investment helped prepare me for ministry. One thing he said has always stuck with me and I’ve often shared it with others. On one occasion he told me, “Scott, I’ve never regretted being too kind.”  

  That’s stuck with me for over four decades. I can attest to the accuracy of those words – I’ve never regretted being too kind. To be sure, there have been a few times that I have been taken advantage of and that’s okay. And more than I want to remember, there have been too many times when I was unkind. Yet, in all of my life, I have never regretted being too kind.

  Kindness is so rare today. We value toughness and meanness. Rarely, do we value kindness. Our culture emphasizes self-promotion and achievement rather than being kind and caring for others. Showing kindness isn’t seen as a priority. It’s often viewed as a weakness. Even for those of us who believe that kindness is a good thing, we’re so preoccupied with our own problems and priorities to make time to invest in and show kindness to each other.

  Perhaps the most surprising aspect of God is His kindness. Kindness doesn’t line up with our preconceptions of a Supreme being or the Creator of the universe. We’d expect that He would be powerful and all-knowing, and maybe even have a mean side. Afterall, many powerful people that we know are known more for toughness and meanness, not kindness. We foolishly equate power and even being a leader with toughness and meanness. Kindness is reserved for Mother Teresa types or Boy Scouts, not those who want to have power or lead.

  A perfect example of true kindness was the Lord Jesus. Huge crowds followed Him and traveled miles just to hear Him speak. Healing the sick, feeding the hungry, teaching the people, caring for the widow, and defending children, Jesus lived 33 years of perfect kindness.

  He doesn’t ask any more of us than what He willingly practiced when He walked this earth. Even on the cross, He displayed compassionate, merciful kindness praying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Defending the weak, poor, and needy, He stated, “As you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”

  Jesus was perfectly selfless in everything He did. Flowing unceasingly from Him, kindness was His lifestyle. He took notice of the cause of the needy, intentionally, and consistently seeking them out, even when He was tired and weary. Without partiality, He was kind to everyone, even if they didn’t “deserve” it. He turned no one away. And by the shedding of his blood on the cross, He demonstrated His love for the entirety of humanity – the ultimate act of kindness. Christ is the perfect role model of kindness.

  Too many of His professed followers though are unkind. Is it any wonder that those outside the Church don’t want our faith? If our Christianity hasn’t radically changed us, what have we got to offer them?

  What does biblical kindness look like? It looks like Jesus. Not for just a season or one day of the year, kindness is for every moment of every day; it’s a habit, a lifestyle, a continual practice. It’s intentional, taking time and patience, a giving of ourselves in “the busy,” even when we’re “too tired.”

   Just being nice for many would be a great starting point. It would entail friendliness, politeness, personal warmth, thoughtfulness, respectfulness, courtesy, and consideration of others. It would mean more smiles than scowls, more laughter than anger, more encouragement than scorn. Most of us could benefit from striving towards the baby steps of the “nice-ness” level of kindness.

  Most of us need to practice kindness so that it becomes our default setting. There’s no better place to start practicing than at home. It begins with our words and tones. As we practice kindness and thoughtfulness with our families, it becomes easier to share when we leave home. Maybe our motto should be: “Kindness – don’t leave home without it.”  

  Kindness can be as simple as a smile (or in our mask times), kind words to a clerk as we check out. It’s a gentle question, “How are you today?” even with complete strangers. It’s holding open a door for someone.

  It’s rarely the big things. More often it’s the little acts that are like oil for smooth relationships. We’ve all experienced them. They warm our hearts, bring a smile to our face and stick with us all day, sometimes for years.

  As you and I intentionally choose to show kindness, the light of the Lord Jesus shines out of us to a harsh world in desperate need of our Savior, a generation in need of love, grace, and kindness. If others talk about us, may it be that they talk about us being filled with kindness. Please be Jesus to someone today and every day. Make the Savior your role model and kindness your lifestyle.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.