I'm so busy....

“We all have one life to live, but if we are too busy to notice the world revolving around us, then we are not living.”  Rexon Wilson

Sometimes I’m concerned about ticking people off with what I write, but not this time. The ones that might be ticked off with my words here will probably never get around to reading it – they’re just too busy.

  What is it about “busyness” and American culture? Unfortunately, I have to confess that I’m a fellow sufferer. Some how we find value in being busy but it’s a skewed yardstick of significance. If you ask the average person, “How are you?” if they don’t mumble the obligatory “fine,” they nearly always hone in on our cultural default, “busy” or “I’m just so busy.”

  Sadly, it’s not just adults. A long, long time ago in a galaxy far away, kids actually got together after school or on weekends just to – play. Not any more, if a kid drops by a neighbor kid’s home to see if they can come out to play or just “hang,” if they’re even home, it has to be scheduled. And it’s not for a day or even a morning or afternoon, it’s perhaps half an hour or hour to just play. (Not to mention that play is often a video game requiring little creativity or imagination). Then, between sports, music lessons and homework – add a whole other factor with a blended family and rotating weekends – children are nearly as exhausted as their chauffeurs, I mean parents. From the CEO to grade school students, everyone talks about their packed schedule. There’s just no room for anything else.

  Yet, perhaps we should delete the word “busy” and replace that whole concept with something a lot more honest. Instead of the word “busy,” what if we used the term “prioritizing my time.” We don’t somehow squeeze events or people into a frantic schedule, instead we must make a choice to consciously schedule time. On a larger scale, let’s stop complaining we’re too busy. Let’s tell the truth instead, which is: “I haven’t prioritized my time for that.” “Busy” is something that happens to us; prioritizing our time is something we make a conscious decision about.

  Rather than looking at your schedule and thinking “I’m too busy,” instead, look at your schedule and ask yourself, “How am I prioritizing my time?” For most of us, this one change will cause us to think differently about our schedule. We can then move forward and begin looking for better ways to control our schedule, instead of acting like we’re puppets on a string, even victims, and letting it control us.

  Horribly destructive time use habits start early, very early. It’s so much a part of our culture that we never consider that something might be wrong. How did we end up living like this? Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we do this to our children? When did we forget that we’re human beings, not doings? Whatever happened to a world where kids get dirty, messy…even bored? Do we have to love our children so much that we over schedule them, making them stressed and busy — just like us? What happened to a world in which we can sit with the people we love and have slow conversations about the state of our heart and soul, conversations that slowly unfold, conversations with pregnant pauses and silences that we’re in no rush to fill? How did we create a world in which we have more and more to do with less time for leisure, less time for reflection, less time for community, less time to just be? As Socrates said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” Yet, how are we supposed to have time to even examine our lives when we’re already so inordinately busy?

  Everyone has the same amount of time – 24 hours a day. To break free from the prison of the overly busy, you must first have an escape plan. It’s not going to be easy. There will be peer pressure, criticism and even perhaps shaming. You must persevere and determine to be a little ruthless.

  Where do we start? We must determine to ruthlessly cut unnecessary stuff out of our lives. Before we can determine what’s necessary and unnecessary, we must have a biblical worldview because what’s valuable to an unbeliever and what’s valuable to a Christ-follower are very different.

  For example, to a non-believer, material things and position have great value. Yet, to have things and position demands more hours working to pay for those things and to maintain that position, not to mention the potential opportunity of moving up the ladder. But then you’re often so “busy,” you rarely have time to enjoy those things you’re working so many hours to pay for. The position that you thought that you needed often becomes a ball and chain, rather than a springboard to fulfillment.

  A believer realizes that things, position, etc. are merely tools. They’re to be managed for God’s glory and purpose, to be enjoyed as gifts from a loving Heavenly Father. To get though to that position is going to require being a bit ruthless. One of the most dangerous American myths is that “you can have it all.” You can’t. You must choose. To have the best, you must be ruthless and determined in your choice.

  How do we accomplish this? First, we must be very acquainted with God’s instruction Book, the Bible. You’ll never have the right values if you’re using the wrong playbook. Then, pray and ask God for wisdom in choosing and evaluating (James 1:5). After you have done that…

  Begin to set your priorities. This isn’t all that complicated: God, marriage, family, church family, vocation, community, personal space, etc. Those are basic for everyone. With those priorities in mind, what do you want to accomplish in your life? Where do you want to be in a month? Six months? A year? What do you need to do each day to get there? Put daily and weekly time blocks in your calendar. Begin with the non-negotiables, then fill in any time left with the non-essentials.

  Plan ahead. Life is a lot like building a house. You start with a set of plans. Then, you secure the materials and workers to begin the project. If you have no plan and are unprepared, that house is going to take a long, long time to build.   

  Change the way you describe your time. Instead of saying to yourself or others that “you’re just too busy,” instead say “I’ve chosen not to prioritize that” because that’s the truth. Whenever you don’t do something in your life, it’s because you’ve chosen not to prioritize that activity. But choosing to prioritize useless activity over active steps that coincide with your values and towards your life goals is a choice you’ll regret.

  So how’s your week looking? Have you allowed yourself to become so busy that you can’t see straight? Are the days ticking by without you reaching your goals? Or, are you consciously prioritizing your life so you can focus on the most important? “So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalms 90:12).