Are you listening?

 “An appreciative listener is always stimulating.” Agatha Christie

 

Punch, a British weekly magazine of humor and satire published a spurious conversation between British author, Oscar Wilde and American artist, James McNeill Whistler. Not to be outdone by a satirical magazine the article prompted this barrage of telegrams between the two famous men.

  Wilde: “Punch too ridiculous. When you and I are together we talk about anything except ourselves.”

  Whister: “No, no, Oscar, you forget. When you and I are together, we never talk about anything except me.”

  Wilde: “It is true, Jimmy, we were talking about you, but I was thinking about myself.”

  No wonder James 1:19 insightfully commands us, “Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak…” Listening, not talking, is the most vital part of communicating. If you truly listen, you’ll begin to deeply understand what the other person is saying. You build the foundation for an intelligent, meaningful conversation and a true relationship. Yet, when you listen superficially, it opens the door for miscommunications and shallow discussions, one very likely to frustrate both the one speaking and the one hearing. You leave the one speaking feeling misunderstood and alone. No wonder the Bible continually encourages us to listen more and talk less. “When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent” (Proverbs 9:10).

  Though the Lord Jesus had more to say and far wiser words than any other person who has ever walked this earth, He was also an avid listener. Often we’re so focused on the words of Jesus, we overlook how attune He was and that He was actively listening. Take a moment and read chapters 3 and 4 of John’s Gospel. In John 3 Jesus converses with a wealthy and well-educated theologian, Nicodemus. In John 4 He converses with a poor, immoral woman, the woman at the well. Though what Jesus says is so striking. His intent, gentle and kind listening must not be overlooked.

  If we want others to listen to us, we must first learn to listen to them. Others tend to listen when they feel valued and listened to. They try to understand when they feel understood. Our Savior was a master in making people feel listened to, understood, cared for, and affirmed. Jesus was a great communicator because He was a great listener. And if you and I are going to be Jesus in this world, we must learn to be good listeners. As we page through the four Gospels we find some key traits of Jesus’ listening skills that as His followers we must emulate.

  Jesus asked questions. Throughout His ministry, Jesus asked questions, often very tough questions, as a means of opening the door to communicating truth. When our children were young when meeting someone new, we taught them to ask vital questions: Who, What, Where, How, and Why? Most people want to share their stories and are eager for someone to listen.

  Who? Who are you? What’s your name? What do you prefer to be called? How do you pronounce your name? Are you named after anyone?

  What? What do you do for a living? What are your interests/hobbies? What do you do in your spare time? What’s your background and history?

  Where? Where do you live? Where are you from? Where have you been? Where is the most exciting, interesting place you have been?

  Why? Why do you work where you work? What got you interested in that? Why did you attend that school? Why do you like that sport/hobby?

  Everyone we meet has a story. Knowing their story helps us better communicate the most important Story to them. A friend truly listens. If we’re going to befriend people, we must first learn to truly listen.

  Jesus was never rushed. Jesus models for us many things in growing in our listening skills. This one hones in on our core problem on why we’re often such poor listeners – Jesus was never in a hurry. There was never a bad time to talk to Him. No matter what was going on, He made time to listen. He was never too busy. He never rushed a conversation to score favorite points, or to get to what He really wanted to talk about. He was patient and communicated that He cared while building rapport.

  Jesus listened with respect. A good listener recognizes how important it is to communicate that what the one speaking has to share is valuable. When you show respect for the ideas and thoughts of others, they’re much more likely to respond respectfully to yours. They’re also more likely to continue to communicate honestly with you. Being a respectful listener involves drawing out important key thoughts and information. This can help to uncover feelings and needs that are unclear. By using statements such as, “Tell me more,” or, “That sounds important,” you let the other person know that you’re fully engaged in the listening process. Jesus didn’t arrogantly shame people or make them feel ignorant or stupid.

  Jesus listened with empathy. Empathy is the capacity to share and understand the experiences and feelings of someone else. Empathetic listening involves listening and responding to another person in such a way that you grow and improve mutual understanding and trust. It’s the ability to fully understand another person with all their feelings, thoughts, and opinions. When someone needs empathy and understanding, it’s very frustrating to talk to someone who doesn’t engage with them or who only offers fix-it advice. As you seek to listen with empathy, learn to listen for what’s not being said, for what’s missing, for what’s needed right now, and what’s important to the speaker?

  The need to listen well and communicate touches every area of our lives. All that we do requires communication with others. In our early years of life, we learn to speak. It’s an essential developmental and a sign that a child is developing normally. Active listening is a vital skill that our Lord modeled and that His followers must learn. Failing to listen can result in a communication disaster. Disagreements, frustration, and discouragement are frequently an outcome of being self-oriented and failing to really listen.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

Choosing Your Battles

 

“You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks.”  Winston Churchill

 When I was a child we often visited my grandparents who owned a small farm in South Georgia. There wasn’t a lot to do and being a typical kid, I’d get bored. So, I’d borrow Ma Ma’s flyswatter and I’d go outside to swat flies. Remember this was a farm with farm animals. Can you imagine how foolish it was to attempt to kill flies outside on a farm? 

  Because we live in a “cancel culture,” sometimes Christians are as foolish. We become so defensive and so caught up in the battle that we miss that sometimes there are things that should be canceled. 

  Recently, the media reported that they’re canceling Dr. Seuss. That’s not completely accurate. Of the sixty children’s books that Dr. Seuss wrote, six of them will no longer be published, But maybe they should be canceled.  

  Dr. Seuss’s real name was Theodor Seuss Geisel and Dr. Geisel became famous, first of all, as a cartoonist of political cartoons and only later more famous and much more wealthy as the bestselling author of children’s books known as the Dr. Seuss books. He took his pen name Dr. Seuss by taking his middle name and using his doctorate in order to identify as Dr. Seuss. His books, his stories, and poetry include unusual rhyme which was a delight to children. His storylines became part of American culture. 

  Why are these six Dr. Seuss books not being republished? Because Dr. Seuss wrote for his day and in them, he used what today is considered offensive and insensitive imagery. The historical context of so much of the controversy has a great deal to do with World War II and with the fact that before he became a children’s author and illustrator, Dr. Seuss was a political cartoonist. In his cartoons that were published before, during and after World War II, there were racist depictions. Many fueled by the war. 

  During World War II propaganda took place on all sides of the war, particularly in the Axis powers, Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan, but also by the allies fighting against the Axis powers. In the United States, even the war posters, the propaganda posters, the advertising that would have been quite familiar to Americans during World War II would be quite concerning to Americans today.  

  That’s what’s really important for us as Christians – the historical context. While that doesn't mean the historical context justifies any kind of artistic misrepresentation, it does mean the historical context helps us understand it. With the attack at Pearl Harbor, Japan became the great enemy. 

  The Bible teaches that every human being is made in the image of God, even the ones who attack us. Christians are commanded to love God and love their neighbor. Every human being is Imago Dei and we’re to celebrate what God has given us in humanity. We’re to treat all people with respect. It’s biblically wrong to dehumanize other image-bearers of God, even in wartime, even in a cartoon or a children’s book. That should caution us from immediately becoming defensive every time there’s a suggestion of cancel culture. Yes, cancel culture is a contemporary reality, but we’re wasting energy to “swat” at all of it. Let me highlight some considerations that may help you navigate these difficult waters. 

  In an extreme culture, the only way to garner attention is to be more extreme than the already extreme. New York Times columnist,  Charles M. Blow, did that when he wrote recently that Pepé Le Pew “normalized rape culture.” Such silliness should have been met with a yawn. Seriously, Pepé Le Pew? Has Mr. Blow watched the music videos by Kool G,  Nicki Minaj, Cardi B and countless others? Can we start with rappers “normalizing rape culture” and violence against women before we target a cartoon skunk? 

  The media loves to manipulate more than they do to report the news. Increased ratings mean increased revenue. Compare the teaser or headline to the actual “news” report. Often it’s a lot of smoke with no fire. Yet, it’s not just secular media that does it. Some Christian organizations are masters of using liberal attacks on our “cherished values” to increase their following and fundraising efforts. 

  Big business cares more about profits than morals. The toy company, Hasbro, received millions of dollars of free advertising when they canceled Mr. Potato Head. The move wasn’t ideological but fiscal. How can a company suggest that they care about human beings, much less sexual “rights” when a large percentage of their factories are in China (over 40 according to a 2018 report). 

  China has a consistent history of being repressive of all human rights. Their genocide of the Uighurs is a confirmed fact. It’s hypocrisy for Hasbro to suggest they care about human rights and freedom while the majority of their manufacturing takes place in China. The same is true of most other major corporations who wring their hands publicly in the States about racism and sexual rights, yet are in bed with evil totalitarian states. 

  Politicians care more about power than ideology. While there is always the wonderful exception, in general politicians will do what it takes to stay in power and keep their party in power. While as Christians we must hold to moral absolutes, politics is the world of compromise and cutting deals. 

  Where does this all leave us? The Bible prophesied that this would happen. “Evil men…will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived” (2 Tim. 3:13). Our Heavenly Father is not surprised by any of this. The Lord Jesus said, “even so, when you see these things happening, you know that the kingdom of God is near” (Luke 21:31). 

  Because we’ve been blessed by God with religious freedom in America, we need to seek to protect it while we can. Yet, even if we lose it, God’s mission has not changed. In a world intoxicated by anger and fear, we’re to live differently. God has called us to be people of grace, faith, and peace.   

  Those 1^st century Christians are our model. They, too, lived in tumultuous times but refused to be distracted from the mission. What our world desperately needs is the gospel, to know that God loves them, that Jesus died on the cross for all of our sins and the only hope is to surrender to King Jesus. God has not called us to be cultural warriors but sharers of the cure, the heart cure – new life in Christ. Let’s not swat at flies when we’re commanded to be sharers of God’s wonderful grace (2 Cor. 5:14, 21).  

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.  

 

 

Gratitude: The Gift that Keeps on Giving

 

“If you can’t be thankful for what you receive,
be thankful for what you escape.”

  Matthew Henry, an 18th-century Puritan preacher whose Bible commentary is one of the most popular of all time, was once accosted by robbers while living in London. Being robbed, having something stolen, or having your home or car broken into is a horrible feeling. You feel so violated. It’s among the most unsettling things that can happen to a person. I’m sure it was, as well, for a quiet, thoughtful pastor and man of letters like Matthew Henry. Yet, somehow, as he reflected on it (as he wrote in his diary), even in that invasive act, Matthew Henry couldn’t help but find something to be thankful for as a result of his misfortune.

  He wrote: “Let me be thankful. First, because I was never robbed before. Second, because although they took my wallet, they did not take my life. Third, because although they took my all, it was not much. Fourth, because it was I who was robbed, not I who robbed.” 

  Wow! I hope my growth in godly gratitude reaches that pinnacle someday. God has worked in my life and I’m so much further than I was, yet I have so far to go. A spirit of thankfulness isn’t something you can check off your “To Do” list and you’re done. It’s an area that you and I will need to continue to work on and grow in until we’re Home. 

  So, how are you doing with gratitude? Hopefully, our series, Thank-full, has helped you. I know it’s helped me. Early in this series, I mentioned Ann Voskamp’s powerful book, One Thousand Gifts. As Ann began to record God’s blessings in her life, others noticed. Before recording God’s blessings in her life she’d struggled with depression and sadness. Writing down God’s blessings revolutionized her life. 

  Are you becoming more grateful? Have others noticed? Have they said anything? If not, let me encourage you to ask a godly friend to let you know how you’re doing in gratitude. We all need the encouragement. And if they honestly share that we’re known more for griping than our gratitude, then we need to repent and grow in thankfulness. 

  Today is our last sermon in this series, but it must not be the end of growing in gratitude. Individually and as a church we must continue to grow in gratitude. It must be part of our spiritual DNA. We have so much to be thankful for. Growing gratitude carries with it countless blessings. 

  Gratitude draws us closer to our Father. All of us love to be thanked. Recently, I took a box of donuts to a local group that I support and someone on their staff took the time to send me a thank you note. It made my day. I took the donuts because I wanted to encourage them. Their thank-you note encouraged me! God designed us that way. Our Father loves it when we sincerely and habitually thank Him. 

  Do you long for a greater sense of God’s closeness? As stress intensifies, when nighttime worries seem to magnify in strength, when days are piling up one after another, or when life simply feels dull and routine, do you crave the assurance of His presence? The Bible says that God inhabits the praise of His people (Psalm 22:3). God lives in the place of praise. If you and I want to go where He is, we must go to His address. 

  Expressing gratitude to our Father makes Him more real in our lives. It increases our depth perception of the One who knows our name, loves us, and knows all about us. He knows our deepest wounds, vilest sins, and failures and still loves us. Intentional gratitude transports us nearer to Him! 

  Gratitude is the path to deep, soul peace. Peace is not a change of scenery. Prayer, peace and thanksgiving all go together. As I pray and leave my burdens with the Father, He floods my soul with peace. And then I thank Him over and over again (Philippians 4:6-7). They’re interrelated. 

  When prayer tag-teams with gratitude, when we open our eyes to see God’s grace and mercies even in the midst of pain and trials when we exercise faith and thank Him even in the storm when we can’t see blue sky anywhere, He meets us with indescribable peace. Praise and prayer are vital. Yet, to really experience His peace we must come to Him in gratitude. Hard gratitude. Costly gratitude. The gratitude that trusts that He is working for our good even in the midst of the fire. It’s the kind that garrisons our hearts with His unexplainable peace. 

  Gratitude is the yardstick of our hearts. When you ask friends over for a meal or out to dinner, it’s a sure sign that you like them and enjoy their company, and are comfortable spending time with them. 

  One common trait of those in the pages of Scripture who were close to the Lord is gratitude. All the other traits of godliness are connected to it. When we’re grateful to God for His obvious and even more subtle (or hard to understand) forms of blessing, it’s a measure of the condition of our heart. It reveals you believe that He is good, faithful, and can be trusted. 

  Complaining, negativity, and pessimism are sadly measures of our heart, too. They may even indicate we don’t really know the Lord. Christians have been rescued at the expense of God’s only Son from Hell. We’ve been forgiven freely because of the cross though we’re absolutely undeserving. The very worst in this life is truly a pittance of pain compared to an eternity separated from God. Stop and think about what Jesus really did for us on the cross. How can we not continually praise Him? 

  In May of 1915, the British passenger ship, Lusitania was torpedoed by a German submarine. When the Lusitania was hit, there were 1,962 people on board. In a matter of minutes, the huge ship began to come apart. In the next few hours, 1,201 passengers and crew died. One of those who went down with the ship was American millionaire, Alfred Vanderbilt. Survivors reported that he spent his last moments helping others to safety. He rounded up as many children as he could and got them into lifeboats. Just before the ship went down, Vanderbilt handed his life jacket to a young mother with a baby in her arms. 

  While it was a brave and noble sacrifice, the Lord Jesus did so much more for us! He took upon Himself all of our sins and died our death, our spiritual death. Without Jesus, we were going down for all eternity. Now we’re going to spend eternity in heaven with Him because of His sacrifice. How can we not overflow with gratitude?

  The forgiven must be known for being thankful! It’s obedience. It’s God’s will. Are you? Let’s grow in gratitude!

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address. 

 

What's the world coming to???

 

“Things fall apart; The center cannot hold;

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world.” William Butler Yeats

 

  There’s a difference between being educated and inundated. There’s a difference between being informed and intimidated. Because much of the news today conflicts with a biblical worldview, personally, I think that we are wise to limit our news and media intake. 

  This may surprise you, but I even limit my intake of Christian media. Too many Christian television and radio shows, blogs, and podcasts perpetuate a gloom and doom, “What’s the world coming to?” attitude.

  Not only do they paint a bleak picture of our world, but they’re “Debbie Downers” or perhaps Christianized “Karens.” They stand on soapboxes to announce to all who will listen how bad it is and it’s getting worse.  Well, “Duh!” Isn’t that what Scripture prophesied? Isn’t that what we find in Matthew 24, 2 Timothy 3, and the book of Revelation? I’ve found that two things are typically true of these prophets of doom and gloom. 

  They’ve idealized the past. They tip their hand with phrases like, “when I was growing up” or “in the good old days.” But you can’t go back far enough to find those “good old days,” unless you go all the way back to the Garden of Eden. Though it may have been in a more infantile form, the same evil we face today was there then. Jews in Germany during the mid-1900s didn’t think that those were the “good days.” Ecclesiastes 7:10 warns us, “Say not, ‘Why were the former days better than these?’” 

  They’ve idolized politics. On September 30, 1938, British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain returned from meeting with Hitler and declared to the world, “Peace for our time” and then the Nazis goose-stepped over Europe. History was repeating itself. Sixty years earlier another Prime Minister, Benjamin Disraeli, upon returning from the Congress of Berlin stated, “I have returned from Germany with peace for our time.” It was the beginning of the end for Russia, followed by World War I. 

  During my lifetime leaders have declared war on poverty, drugs, terrorism, etc., and we haven’t won a single one. It’s foolish to place our hope in politics or government. The Jews made that blunder prior to the exile before the Babylonian invasion. They looked to Egypt to rescue them. 

  As Christians, our hope is not in this world. We’re not to be handwringers or just survive. God has called us to thrive even in a morally decaying world. This isn’t thriving in temporal world values. It’s so much better and greater! God empowers us to thrive in the spiritual and eternal. All that this world considers thriving will be gone in 100 years, if not less. We thrive not because we have it so good but because our God is so awesome! 

  Jesus isn’t wringing His hands about what’s happening at the United Nations or D.C., or the debauchery of Hollywood. He will build His church and absolutely nothing can stop Him. We’re to live for something that matters, that has eternal significance. It begins with an attitude: Are we going to interpret and respond to our current circumstances through the lens of faith or are we going to interpret our God through the lens of our current reality?   What will it take for us to thrive? 

  Knowing and Obeying God’s Word. The Bible prepares us for this spiritual onslaught but you have to know the strategy. In the middle of a firefight, there’s no time for hesitation or discussion. The time for preparation is today so that we’re prepared for whatever comes tomorrow…and it will come. Obedience doesn’t come naturally though. It must be learned. It’s learned as we dig in deep into Scripture. We prepare for whatever may come tomorrow by being people of the Word today! 

  An Eternal Perspective. Without perspective, things are blown out of proportion. We catastrophize. Any encroachment on privilege becomes persecution. Opposition becomes hatred. Political setbacks become a cause for anguish and despair. In short, we evaluate and extrapolate without putting God into the equation. Seeing life from God’s perspective changes everything. Marines who retire and enter the workforce seldom complain about office politics, workplace inequities, or the things that send others for a loop. They’ve developed a bigger perspective. 

  Endurance. You will never thrive without it. You’ll miss out on God’s rewards if you lack staying power. Scripture continually admonishes us to stick to the stuff, to not throw in the towel when stressed or pushed to the limits (James 1:12). The ones who cross the finish line win, not the ones who bailed and quit halfway. 

  Confidence and Courage. “The righteous are as bold as a lion” (Proverbs 28:1). The dictionary defines courage as “the ability to face and deal with a dangerous or difficult situation.” One of my favorite quotes is that “Courage is fear that has said its prayers.” Or as, General George Patton defined it, “Courage is fear that holds on for one more minute.” 

  Confidence and courage that comes from God is what we need for the trials of this life. It’s the needed power for a family dealing with terminal cancer, or a single parent, struggling to raise their family. It’s the needed power for a widow or widower facing the last years of life without a beloved spouse. It’s the needed power for a child of divorce, struggling to win over doubt, anger and feelings of rejection. It’s the needed power for someone who moves into a high crime, urban area to be light in a dark place. It’s the needed power for an employee who sees evil, greed or corruption, and has the courage to blow the whistle. It’s the needed power for the student who’s unintimidated and asks questions from a biblical worldview when Scripture is being ridiculed in the classroom. 

  Confidence and courage are bravery in the face of danger. Steadfastness in the face of opposition. Action in the face of resistance and optimism in the face of despair. The first says I won’t be afraid. The second says I won’t give up. The third says I won’t be intimidated and the fourth says I won’t lose heart. God’s faithful ones throughout the ages weren’t handwringers. They’ve been Josephs and Daniels and Esthers. They chose by God’s grace to thrive not merely survive. They’re the contemporary Corrie ten Booms and the Richard Wurmbrands. They’re the many Christians sharing Jesus in Iran, China, and North Korea. They all know that it’s not look what the world is coming to. It’s look WHO  is coming to the world! “Even so come Lord Jesus!” (Rev. 22:20).

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.