A Christ-follower with a limp: December 2017

Sunday, December 31, 2017

Some Righteous Resolutions

“Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” Carl Bard

Every year, around 45% of Americans seize upon the desire for a fresh start at New Year’s and make one or more resolutions. We determine to lose weight, exercise more, quit smoking, or get out of debt. We feel determined. We join a fitness center or a 12-step program. We create a plan for change. Yet every year, 97% of us fail. Early efforts prove to be a flash in the pan. In the end, we forget and quit. It’s over and nothing changes.

Please do make some of those needed changes and stick with them. Yet, let me add to that – consider what really counts, the eternal and spiritual. If you get out of debt, lose weight or stop smoking – it only counts for this short life. Changes though in our spiritual life make a difference in eternity. It’s the difference between buying a gift for someone at the Dollar Store or at Neiman Marcus. Which would you rather have? So let me share some suggestions on eternal changes to consider.

Reading your Bible daily. This is one of the most important commitments a Christian can make. Each day we must make decisions and want to accomplish something. If you begin your day with the Bible, you’ve already accomplished one of the most important things you’ll do that day. You’ve spent time with your Heavenly Father who loves you and knows exactly what you’re going to face that day. It’s best to start small and be systematic. If you’ve never done this before, begin with one of the Gospels. Read a chapter or least half a chapter a day. I’d consider adding a chapter from Proverbs. The book of Proverbs has 31 chapters and you can easily read the chapter that coincides with the day. Perhaps you’ve never read the Bible through. There are several Bible reading plans available. We have one on the back table available and a link at the bottom of this week’s Sword Challenge that will direct you to four different options.

Committed prayer time. Reading our Bible is allowing our Father to speak to us through His love letter. Prayer is our conversing back with Him. Too often our prayer life is little more than a grocery list. How would we feel if the only time that we heard from a friend was when they needed something? God wants us to talk to Him. But it’s normal to struggle with what to pray about. I love this simple approach called A.C.T.S. Adoration: Give God praise and honor for who He is as Lord over all. Confession: Honestly deal with sin in your life. Thanksgiving: Verbalize what you're grateful for. Supplication: Pray for the needs of others and yourself.

Commit to worship and community. God designed us for worship and community. Our struggle is that there are so many options and we seemingly have so many things to do. It’s easy to deceive ourselves in to thinking that we’re faithful in worship if we attend once or twice a month. Let me encourage you to commit to attending every Sunday unless you’re providentially hindered. And determine to make some type of Grace Group part of your life, whether it’s one that meets on Sundays or one that meets every other week on a weeknight. Since sin entered the world, we’re resistant to community. We like to keep others, even brothers and sisters in Christ, at a safe distance and not let them glimpse into our souls. Community is essential to our spiritual health and growth. You will never grow spiritually and have all that God has for you ALONE.

Grow past that sinful habit that keeps throwing you spiritually. For some it may be something overt like substance abuse, porn addiction, anger or materialism. For most of us though, it’s an attitude which pops up as a sinful behavior. First, remember that it’s already paid for and conquered at the Cross, and your Heavenly Father already knows about it. But you can never just stop something. Scripture teaches the principle of godly replacement. Check out Ephesians 4 for a wonderful model of leaving something and replacing it with something godly, eternal and better. This might be one where you ask a mature Christian friend to help and share with you where he/she thinks that you most need to grow. Most of us are blind to our own spiritual weak spots. Our attitudes are usually the biggest barriers to a vibrant relationship with the Lord and with others. Some of the more common sinful attitudes are arrogance, a critical or negative spirit, a selfish one, or even a fearful or doubting spirit.

Grow in generosity. If you focus on the other four, the Spirit will make this one nearly happen spontaneously. First, praise God each day for His countless blessings. Then, most of us need to grow and learn to be lavish in our praise toward those closest to us. Praise and affirm the ones that God has brought directly into your life – your spouse and children. For many of us, one encouraging word a day would be a huge step forward. How sad that we often are kinder and more gracious with a clerk in a store.

Then, be generous in sharing your faith. Everyone that you meet will spend eternity somewhere. Ask the Lord for daily opportunities to share the gospel and seek to build gospel bridges. Finally, be generous with your time and money. Ours is a narcissistic world, but we are not of this world. Those who are spiritually mature and love the Lord are always generous. You can’t be close to a generous God without becoming generous as He is.

Finally, write it down and date it. Writing it down helps keep us accountable. You might ask a godly friend to be your accountability partner. As you look back at it at the end of 2018, it will encourage you. You probably won’t get as far as you desire, yet you’re headed in the right direction! And God is more interested in our direction than in our distance.

Can we help you spiritually? Can we help you know Jesus better? Please check out more resources on our church's web page, Gracechurchwi.org. Or, call us at 262.763.3021. If you'd like to know more about how Jesus can change your life, I'd love to mail you a copy of how Jesus changed my life in "My Story." E-mail me at Carson@gracechurchwi.org to request a free copy. Please include your mailing address.

Sunday, December 24, 2017

I'll be Home for Christmas

“I’ll be Home for Christmas, if only in my dreams.”

Have you ever noticed that many of the Christmas movies center around home and family? Most of us have a mental picture of the perfect Christmas scene – a peaceful picture of home with loving family gathered together for the holiday. Yet, even when everything is seemingly perfect, there’s still some dull nagging in our hearts that there’s something more. Even when we’re home, in an ideal, nearly perfect home…there’s an innate longing for something else, a longing for the perfect home.

Home has a powerful influence on us. Billions are spent annually by those retracing their ancestry. Those who were foreign born long to return home, even if home is continents away. Home is such a powerful part of our make-up that children who never find a place where they feel they belong struggle with an incapacity for attachment into their adult lives.

Most of us have had the nostalgia longing for a special place from our youth…the family home or annual vacation place. It carries a very special spot in our hearts. Yet, if we have the opportunity to return to the actual place, it’s filled with disappointment. It doesn’t live up to our expectations. The reality of actually being there leaves us with a sense of loss.

That song, “I’ll be home for Christmas” has long been one of my favorites. Originally recorded in 1943 by Bing Crosby, it became a top hit. It was written to honor American soldiers overseas who longed to be home at Christmas. It’s sung from the point of view of a soldier stationed on a foreign battlefield during World War II, writing a letter to his family. In the message, he tells his family he’ll be coming home and to prepare the holiday for him. He requests snow, mistletoe and presents on the tree. It ends on a melancholy note, with the soldier saying, “I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams.”

The U.S. War Department released Crosby’s performance of the song in a December 7, 1944 broadcast. It touched the hearts of Americans, soldiers and civilians alike, in the midst of World War II and became the most requested song at Christmas U.S.O shows. GI magazine, Yank, said Crosby had “accomplished more for military morale than anyone else of that era.”

It wasn’t until college that I recall ever hearing that song but it became very special to me my junior year. That year, I had no Christmas plans and was staying in the dormitories for the entire holiday season. On Christmas Eve, I worked a 16 hour shift through Christmas morning as a security guard at Brownberry Ovens in Oconomowoc. It was one of the few times that they shut down all year and they needed someone in the plant. Needless, to say it was a very lonely Christmas.

Yet, even in the most idyllic home and Christmas gathering, the child of God still senses it. We are not Home yet. The Apostle Peter refers to us as “sojourners and exiles” (1 Peter 2:11). Add to that, believers in Christ are soldiers engaged in spiritual warfare (Ephesians 6:10). Deep within us there’s a longing that nothing on this side of eternity can satisfy or suppress. We want to be Home. It’s great to know that we’re on the winning side, but we often grow weary of the battle.

Home, then, is a powerful but elusive concept. The strong feelings that surround it reveal that deep longing that we all have within us for a place that suits us, where we can be or perhaps find, our true selves. Even with the very best Christmas, there’s a sense of “Is this it? Is this all there is?” No place, home, or actual family satisfies those yearnings, though many situations arouse them. The concept of home awakens a desire that just can’t be totally fulfilled, so we end up disappointed under the weight of our own impossible expectations. Why? We are made for another Home.

As we turn to the pages of Scripture, Hebrews 13:14 encourages us to remember and find strength in the fact that “For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come.” It’s a losing battle to pursue lasting satisfaction in this life. The words, “here we have no lasting city” drive us to the only source of contentment on this side of Home: the promise that Christ is always with us (Matthew 28:20) on our journey because we’re not Home yet. He’s bringing us home to a place where love, joy, and satisfaction never end. As Randy Alcorn writes, “Things won't always take a better turn on an Earth that is under the curse. Sickness, loss, grief, and death will find us. Just as our reward will come in Heaven, laughter (itself one of our rewards) will come in Heaven.” Christmas, then, is a reminder that Jesus, in the Incarnation, left His Home in Heaven for us so that we could have a true Home.

In another December, December of 1903, after multiple attempts, the Wright brothers were finally successful in getting their “flying machine” off the ground. Thrilled, they telegraphed this message to their sister Katherine: “We have actually flown 120 feet. Will be home for Christmas.”

Katherine hurried to the editor of the local paper and showed him the message. He glanced at it and said, “How nice. The boys will be home for Christmas.” He totally missed the big news, man had finally flown.

Many at Christmas miss the biggest news. They’re looking for Home here but Jesus came so we could have a Home there, a perfect and everlasting one. Jesus came to this earth, took on human flesh, lived a perfect life, died for us thus paying our debt of sin so that we can have a Home where there’s no more pain, dissatisfaction or death. It’s His Christmas gift to us. Your name is on the tag (John 3:16). So have you accepted God’s Christmas gift to you so that you can have a real Home for all eternity?

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Real Royalty!

“He was created by a mother whom He created. He was carried by hands that He formed. He cried in the manger in wordless infancy, He the Word, without whom all human eloquence is mute.” Augustine

Maybe I’m missing something but I just don’t get it. Personally, I don’t see why it even made news, but it did. I’m referring to the recent “history-making announcement” that Prince Harry and his American girlfriend, Meghan Markle, are engaged and will wed in the spring (Uhm, should I stop yawning now?). But don’t we celebrate every 4^th of July about getting free from royalty, for something like 240 years now? Didn’t that mean we switched tea for coffee? Soccer for a man’s sport, like football? Stopped talking funny and all proper? Replaced tiny cars with big ones? (They don’t even drive on the right side of the road.) And who wants to live on an island when you can have a continent?

Yet, in spite of all the reasons that we’re glad that we’re not British, countless Americans still treat British royalty like royalty…even though in the U.S. of A, we don’t have royalty. And if Meghan and Harry get married at 3 am, gazillions of Americans (particularly those of a certain gender) will get up to watch the whole affair.

Have you ever noticed that the very ones who should have sought out royalty at Christ’s birth didn’t? In the narrative of His birth I find one part that always leaves me bewildered. It’s in Matthew’s Gospel. When the wise men came to Jerusalem looking for the “King of the Jews,” the theologians and professional clergy all knew, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for so it is written by the prophet: ‘And you, O Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; for from you shall come a ruler who will shepherd my people Israel’” (Matthew 2:5-6). So since they all knew, why didn’t the religious leaders go to Bethlehem? After all, it was so close, a mere six miles. If they knew that the Messiah was to be born there, why didn’t they go and check it out for themselves?

Comparatively, the Magi knew so little, yet came so far and gave so much. The priests and teachers of the law knew so much but did so little. If Jesus came to Milwaukee, would we go and see Him? What if Jesus came to Chicago, would we be too busy to check it out? But they didn’t.

Why not? It’s the age-old problem, good people, nice ones, and particularly religious people don’t think that they really need Jesus. In spite of those silly Facebook quizzes about who is naughty or nice, most of us believe we’re on God’s “nice list” and Jesus didn’t come for “nice people.”

Nice people think that ultimately their niceness will pay off, that in a sense God owes them. Good people are fastidious in their compliance to ethical norms. They faithfully fulfill all the traditional family, community and civic responsibilities, but it’s often a slavish, joyless drudgery.

The word “slave” has strong overtones of being forced or pushed rather than drawn or attracted. A slave works out of fear—fear of consequences imposed by force. This goes to the root of what often drives the “good” and religious crowd. Ultimately, good religious people live good lives out of fear, not out of joy and love…and certainly not freedom.

The bottom line is that though they may be kind to others and even helpful to the poor, at a deeper level, they’re doing it either so God will bless them, or so they can think of themselves as nice, virtuous, charitable people. They’re not really doing things for other people or even for God. They’re not feeding the hungry and clothing the poor for the poor. They’re feeding and clothing themselves. The heart’s fundamental self-centeredness is not only kept intact, it’s nurtured by fear-based moralism. Religious and moral duties are an incredibly heavy burden. Emotional frustration and inner boredom with life is repressed and denied. Good people are under extreme pressure to appear, even to themselves as nice, happy and content.

But the greatest loss though is a lack of assurance of God’s love and acceptance. What are some signs of a lack of that assurance? Every time something goes wrong in their life or a prayer goes unanswered, they wonder if it’s because they aren’t living as morally or upright as maybe they should. Theirs is a “hope so” religion. “I hope God really loves me.” “I hope I’m forgiven.” “I hope I’m on my way to heaven.”

Jesus came to give us assurance and true hope as part of God’s forever family. He came to be our Savior, “For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior” (Luke 2:11). The religious leaders in Jerusalem were ignorant of their greatest need. Though they were good and religious, it wasn’t enough – they needed a Savior, and so do you and so do I.

Perhaps you’re very nice, religious and believe in Jesus, but for far too many that belief has never led to a point of personal commitment. You know Him intellectually, but not personally. And we all have the same great need. It’s the one that the angel told Joseph about, “you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins” (Matthew 1:21). We all have a sin problem. It’s one that we can never solve ourselves. It’s why Jesus came. But we must come to Him, like the shepherds and Magi. Christ never turns away any heart that’s open to Him. Those who seek Him find Him. The wise still seek Him. Have you sought Jesus as your Savior?

If you want to watch the royal wedding next year, go ahead and enjoy it. Yet, whatever you do, please don’t miss out on the real King and true royalty that can make a difference in your life now and for eternity. Crown the one true King, King Jesus, as King of your life today.

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Blessed are "The Silence Breakers!"

“The silence was killing me. And that's all there ever was. Silence. It was all I knew. Keep quiet. Pretend nothing had happened, that nothing was wrong. And look how well that was turning out.” J. Lynn

I can’t remember the last time that a Time magazine cover caught my attention, particularly in a good way. Yet, their “Person of the Year” cover did just that. Not only did it catch my attention, but I commend them for it.

This year’s person of the year are a group of women that Time called “The Silence Breakers.” Finally, after decades of the exploitation of those less famous and powerful, it’s coming out that Hollywood has had a long vile and hidden history of rape, sexual exploitation and harassment. While it’s true that a case can be easily made that the Hollywood culture has encouraged this dehumanization and exploitation with its movies and TV shows, but that’s drama and fiction, not real life. What is coming out is real life, true victimization, criminal and inhumane.

Personally, I think it will sadly be a temporary noise that will all be soon forgotten. The reason that I say that is because from what I can see, rappers and star athletes not only have long exploited women but continue to do so with little accountability. Add to that, the inherent hypocrisy of the Hollywood culture. That’s evidenced by two other recent magazine front covers – one with a picture of Harvey Weinstein condemning his actions and the other, right next to it, with Hugh Hefner’s picture applauding his life. It's the natural outcome of a culture with no moral compass.

While those in the limelight have long been purported as being nothing like the rest of us in that they wear clothes we can’t afford, drive cars and live in houses beyond our dreams, yet it turns out that—in the most painful and personal ways—celebrities are more like us than the public ever knew.

And when celebrities don’t know where to go for justice, what hope is there for the average person? What hope is there for the secretary who repeatedly fends off her boss who won’t take no for an answer? For the hotel housekeeper who never knows, as she goes about cleaning rooms, if a guest might corner her in a room that she can’t escape? For the high school athlete who doesn’t want to be a labeled a tattletale when his coach attempts sexual advances on him?

The Church of Jesus Christ must be that safe place! Our church must be that safe place. While we have little control over the Church universal, you and I are accountable for this local church body and family of believers.

Tragically, in some churches, because of the predator’s position or finances or power, it’s swept under the rug. That must never happen at Grace. How can we expect God’s blessing if we fail to live by God’s standards of holiness and integrity? Even if it’s the pastor, a church leader or the biggest donor in our church – if there is a violation of biblical commands or moral integrity, it must be dealt with.

Over the years I’ve told some spouses, that if I learn that they are physically abusing their spouse, their spouse will not have to call law enforcement because I’ll be making that phone call. But it’s not just the pastor who carries that responsibility, it’s everyone in our church family, because too often the pastor is the last to know.

As brothers and sisters, if we observe someone being sexually inappropriate, we need to confront them and hold them accountable. By that I mean, if you notice someone flirting with someone other than their spouse, or putting themselves in situations where there could be questions about their moral integrity, they must be held accountable.

Then, if someone confides in you that there has been sexual abuse, it must be dealt with. It’s not only sin, but it is criminal behavior. Periodically someone will say something silly like, “Well, I promised not to tell.” So if they’d confided in you that they were going to murder someone or harm themselves, would you keep it a secret? My practice is that if someone comes to me and says, “I need to tell you something but you have to promise not to tell anyone,” I respond, “I’ll try but I won’t promise.” What if someone tells me something that needs to be shared? I don’t want to be locked in by a foolish promise…and neither do you.

Sometimes it’s verbal abuse. If someone is demeaning or speaking cruelly to their spouse or child, they need to be held accountable. Proverbs 27:6, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend…” And there is no place for locker room talk, even when those of the other gender are not present. Off-color jokes are never funny and God is always listening and will hold us accountable for every word we speak. Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

As believers, it is vital that we are pure, respectful and kind in our words toward everyone. Just because we have the power to verbally brutalize someone like a spouse or child, does not mean that it can be justified. No one should ever be shamed, just because someone has the power or position to do so. If it happens, other believers should graciously hold the “shamer” accountable. Galatians 6:1 encourages us, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.”

It’s imperative that the Church be a place of safety. That begins with me and you. We’re on the front lines. We must trust God and have the spiritual courage to do the right thing even if it costs us, because some day King Jesus will hold us accountable for what we did or did not do.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

David Cassidy and the Tragedy of Deja Vu

“So much wasted time…” David Cassidy’s last words

David Cassidy, known primarily for his role in the 1970s musical-sitcom, The Partridge Family, died on November 21^st. He was 67. Born into a show business family, he rocketed to stardom on The Partridge Family. As eldest son “Keith Partridge,” he became a global heartthrob as the face – and voice – of the Partridge Family’s biggest hit, “I Think I Love You.”

After the show ended in 1974, he devoted himself to recording and songwriting, but struggled to match the success of his early-20s. Late in life, he struggled with numerous personal problems. He was charged with driving under the influence on three separate occasions. His third wife, Sue Shifrin, filed for divorce in February of 2014 after 23 years of marriage. In 2015, he filed for bankruptcy, listing assets and debts of up to $10 million. That September, he was cited for leaving the scene of an accident.

David Cassidy is survived by two children, musician Beau Cassidy and actress Katie Cassidy, with whom he acknowledged having a distant relationship. “I wasn't her father. I was her biological father but I didn't raise her,” he told an interviewer earlier this year. “She has a completely different life.” Yet, David Cassidy himself was estranged from his father, actor Jack Cassidy. He often expressed regret about Jack being mostly absent from his life after David’s parents split up when he was 5. He stayed with his mother and by the early 1960s had moved to Los Angeles.

As I read articles about his death, I felt very sad. What saddened me the most was that though David Cassidy personally knew the pain of being estranged from his father, he repeated that terrible wounding in the lives of his own children. They needlessly became victims because of his failure to change generational family patterns from which he himself had so terribly suffered. Sadly, it’s a common pattern and one we often find in the Bible.

If we do not determine to be proactive, we too will face the consequences of generational sin. Sin always has consequences. Many of us are familiar with the law of the harvest that we find in Galatians 6:7-8a, “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption…” You reap what you sow. There’s no escape from this law. If you sow carrots, you get carrots. If you sow strawberries, you get strawberries. If you sow good things in your life, you reap good things. If you sow sin in your life, you reap the consequences of that sin.

David Cassidy passed down family sin generationally. It’s a common cycle – sin patterns are passed down from parents to children and then to their children. For example, Abraham passed down the sin of lying to Isaac, who passed it on to his deceiving son Jacob. A study of Israel’s kings show how one king after another was influenced by his father’s sin. Let me share just one example. “Ahaziah the son of Ahab began to reign over Israel…and he reigned two years over Israel. He did what was evil in the sight of the Lord and walked in the way of his father and in the way of his mother…He provoked the Lord…to anger in every way that his father had done” (1 Kings 22:51-53).

We see this law at work within our own families and in society around us. Prejudice is passed down. Alcoholism runs in families. Children of divorced parents are more prone to divorce. This law of the generational harvest should sober us when we ponder the implications for our children and grandchildren.

When I counsel a young couple in our pre-marital sessions, I warn them that unless they are biblically pro-active, their marriage and parenting will repeat the patterns of their parents. Recently, I saw a picture of a family gathering. The grandfather had a reputation for being surly and negative. It was very disheartening to see that same spirit reflected in the countenances of his grandchildren. Yet, the opposite is often true. If parents are kind and thoughtful, the adult children will often be kind and thoughtful.

Any pastor who has been in the ministry for at least a generation can fairly accurately predict the spiritual aptitude of the next generation. If the parents were casual about spiritual things, haphazard about church attendance or the application of spiritual truth, their adult children will often only increase in those sad patterns. Many times they completely drop out of church and have little or no fruits of Christlikeness in their lives.

So what can we do? Be honest with ourselves, God and our children. The wrong tendency is to rationalize and justify ourselves. The solution is to instead confess our sin and humble ourselves. Then, we need to ask the Lord to reveal secret sins to us and sinful patterns. After we confess them and ask for God’s grace, we must be honest with our adult children and take responsibility for our failures. I appreciate that David Cassidy was honest and admitted that he blew it. Unfortunately, he waited until nearly the end of his life to do it.

Finally, we need to faithfully study God’s Word and look for spiritually healthy patterns. As we see them, we must cry out to God for grace and the Spirit’s power to replace our sinful patterns with the successful, godly ones that we see in Scripture.

As I look back on my countless failures as a husband and father, the truth of Proverbs 18:13 encourages me, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” We all blow it but God loves to pour out His mercy and grace on us. But someone needs to stop and break the evil pattern. Will it be you?